Broken Wings
by DwellerinDarkness
Summary: When J.D. McCoy winds up in the hospital, the Taylors are once again pulled into the family's drama. Tami does her best to make things right, but some wounds run too deep.
1. Pinpricks

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:** This story is set in a fictional version of season four (mainly because I have only seen portions of the first half of the season) where the Taylor's are still at odds with the McCoys but Eric is still the head coach of the Dillon Panthers.

**SUMMARY:** When J.D. McCoy winds up in the hospital, the Taylors are once again pulled into the family's drama. Tami does her best to make things right, but some wounds run too deep.

**BROKEN WINGS**

**CHAPTER 1: PINPRICKS**

A voice on the intercom kept cutting into the comfortable, warm darkness of J.D.'s mind. He wanted to block the voice out for it wasn't saying anything that made sense and was sending pinpricks of consciousness into his slumber. The growing awareness of self made him wonder why he was hearing an intercom in the first place and he worried that he had fallen asleep in class. He tried to open his eyes but couldn't, and realized that his lips and nose were burning. Was he at home with the furnace on too high? What was the air seeping up through his cheeks? Trying again, he forced his eyes open and blinked. When he saw the speckled tiles of the ceiling, his mind tugged with familiarity that he couldn't place.

His chest felt tight, like something heavy was sitting on him, so he tried to take a deep breath and winced, screwing his eyes shut at the fire that spread from his lungs. The pain was as distantly familiar as the ceiling tiles, and a bespectacled woman's face drifted into his mind. The woman had her hair tied back in a green cap and she wore scrubs and gloves. She had asked him to do something. What was it? She had asked him to count back from fifty...

Surgery. He had been going into surgery. That's why his chest hurt and why he had a breathing mask on his mouth and nose, drying him out. He remembered that he had arms and legs and as his consciousness surged through his body, he moved his toes and fingers. If he was still whole, why did he feel so hollow? The twitch of his right thumb sent a tingling numbness through his forearm and he realized how cold the limb was. Blinking again to try to clear his vision, he lifted his head off the pillow a little to look down at his arm. But as soon as he shifted, his head swam and pulsed with a dull ache that permeated his brains, and his abdomen shot out a vein of searing heat, churning his stomach. Gently leaning his head back down, he closed his eyes and lay as still as he could, waiting for the nausea to pass and the world to stop spinning from the rush of his blood.

When he felt more stable, he opened his eyes again and looked at what he could see of the hospital room. He was in a bed surrounded by machines either on carts or mounted on the walls. One was blowing air into his mask and another was wired to his chest, monitoring his heartbeat. Other machines surrounded him, as well, but as far as he could tell, they were turned off. His arm and chest felt tight, and when he angled his chin to look down, he saw that his right hand was bound in bandages and that a red tube was sticking out of his elbow. After a moment, he realized the tube itself wasn't red, but rather that it was feeding him blood. As soon as he registered what he was seeing, the place where the needle entered his arm felt very cold and foreign and he didn't dare move his arm at all.

Why did he need extra blood? He couldn't remember losing any. In fact, he couldn't remember even coming to the hospital at all. Someone had bumped him in the hallway at school, and he'd known the bump was intentional but ignored it because a teacher was nearby. He had gone to practice and... in the back of his wandering memory with the image of the night sky with stars just out of reach. They had reminded him of the glow in the dark constellations he had on his ceiling before his dad tore them down, claiming he was too old for stickers.

He thought of school and saw his breath clouding above him, he thought of practice and smelled dewy, cold grass. Then he thought of lying on the hillside yards from his house, so cold that he was numb, watching the stars appear one by one, and realized that the cold and the grass belonged to that memory. After a while, the stars had drifted closer and became blurry, and he had felt so very sick inside, like he was growing heavy and turning into a rock. But the memory of lying and stargazing felt like a fever-dream and was as nebulous as it was tangible. More than anything, it made his skin crawl.

He tried to remember anything else that felt recent but he couldn't, and the pinpricks of consciousness were beginning to seal back up. All that remained was the memory of the woman with the glasses and the soothing voice, asking him to go to sleep, and the blur of lights on the ceiling as he drifted. His mind began to sway, and he felt unsteady, like he was falling, and the burning in his mouth and nose began to feel comforting for it anchored him to his bed. He focused on the sensation, and soon his own breathing lulled him to sleep.

* * *

Coach Taylor chomped on his gum as he surveyed his players while they exited the locker room and headed for the field. Several of them were laughing and joking around which was always a good sign. As much as he didn't allow mischief at practice, their energy and upbeat attitude was exactly what he liked to see. Turning away from them, he headed up to the field and stood by his assistant coaches, overhearing the end of their discussion about the homecoming game. It wasn't terribly important to the rest of the season, but Coach Taylor was certain it would be a big boost to his team's morale, especially the seniors.

Several of the younger players were missing Saracen, Riggins and the rest of the upperclassmen who were now gone, but homecoming would prove to the new crop of seniors that they were just as talented and valued. Landry had already been stepping up as a leader, which seemed less expected by him than by Eric, who had always seen great potential in the kid, not only on the field, but off, as well.

"All right, let's get moving," Eric said, tucking his clipboard under his hand to clap. "Give me three laps."

The players started jogging, and as they ran, Eric scanned their ranks and realized one of them was missing. He waited until Landry jogged past on his second lap to call out to him.

"Hey, Landry!"

The redhead peeled off from the group and jogged over to the coach, pulling off his helmet.

"You seen J.D.?"

He shook his head. "No, sir. But, I mean, it's not like I have any classes with him or anything."

Eric chomped on his gum for a few moments before slapping his shoulder. "All right." Landry stuck his helmet back on and jogged back to rejoin his teammates as Eric peeled away from the group and pulled out his cell phone to call his wife. It wasn't like J.D. to miss practice, but the kid had been acting a little headstrong lately, picking fights with his teammates and blaming everyone for interceptions and fumbles but himself. As a coach, Eric tried not to cut the sixteen-year old much slack just because he knew more about his personal life than he did about most of the other players. It wouldn't be fair if he let the kid mouth off just because his dad was nearly crushing him with pressure, so he slapped him on the wrist just as he would with any other player.

But if the kid was flaking on practice or sick and didn't even bother to warn his coach with even a text, he better be on his deathbed. Eric had scheduled a session today with Wade Aikman so that J.D. could get some one on one throwing practice. In fact, he was surprised Joe McCoy himself hadn't shown up to make sure the training was to his liking. The kid needed to learn that no matter how talented or rich he was, there was no excuse for wasting other people's time.

The phone began to ring, but before Tami answered, Eric caught sight of Buddy Garrity getting out of his suburban across the field.

"Hey, babe," Tami answered.

"You've got to be kidding me," Eric muttered, watching Buddy frantically wave and start to jog.

"What is it, hun?"

"Buddy Garrity is trying to run." He could hear Tami snort on the other line.

"Eric!" Buddy yelled through his huffing and puffing, still half a field away.

Eric sighed. "Can you do me a favor?"

"Sure, what do you need?"

"Can you check the attendance records for me? I wanna know if J.D. McCoy is sick or if he's pulling some sort of power trip with me. He knew he was supposed to have a special practice today and he ain't here."

"All right, let me –" She cut herself off as her office phone rang. "Just a sec, babe, I've gotta take this."

"Yeah, all right." Eric chomped away at his gum, grateful for his sunglasses that disguised the direction of his eye, pretending he hadn't yet seen Buddy.

"Oh my God," he could hear Tami gasp, though her voice was muffled since her cell was sitting a ways from her. "Oh my God, that's terrible. No, I had no idea."

"Coach Eric," Buddy called, getting closer. Eric was forced to give him an appeasing smile of acknowledgement as he heard Tami say goodbye to the other line and pick up her cell again.

"He's in the hospital," Tami said.

"Who?"

"J.D. McCoy. He's in the hospital."

Eric's lips parted slightly as he was about to ask "what," but as Buddy Garrity's flushed and frantic face neared him, he realized the older man had been hurrying to bring him the same news. A cold, sick feeling twisted in his gut as Buddy shook his head, his mouth a grim line.

**PLEASE LEAVE COMMENTS!**


	2. Cold Dread

**BROKEN WINGS**

**CHAPTER 2: COLD DREAD**

Eric sat in the waiting room of the hospital, holding a bouquet of flowers and watching as his wife spoke to the nurse supervisor who had come to the front desk. He was close enough to hear what they were saying but was keeping his distance as he texted Julie to tell her where they were and why she'd have to watch Gracie a little longer.

Tami shook her head, adjusting her purse on her shoulder. "I don't understand, we can't even –"

"I'm sorry," the nurse supervisor said. "But only family are allowed to visit patients in the ICU."

"All right." Tami sighed and returned to the lobby, taking a seat next to her husband.

"She say how he's doing?"

Tami shook her head no. "'Only family,'" she said, mimicking the nurse's tone. "I think we ought to wait here for Katie or Joe. His room's just down the hall so they're bound to walk by, and you know, we ought to give them –"

"Yeah, I'll tell you what we oughta give them. I oughta call the cops on Joe McCoy right now is what we oughta do."

"Honey, we have no idea if he had anything to do with this. If he did, Child Protective Services would be all over him."

"Yeah, well I don't trust him one bit. Not after what he's pulled." He sent the message then tucked his phone away.

"I know, I know, I'm just saying..." She lowered her voice as another woman took a seat in the lobby. "I'm just saying that we shouldn't go around accusing people when we don't know all the facts."

Eric sighed through his nose, setting down the flowers and staring at the armchair in front of him. "You know, I don't even know why we're waiting around here. The McCoy's have made it very clear that they don't want anything to do with us."

Tami shook her head. "What if it was Julie in there?"

Eric looked at her.

"He's just a kid, he doesn't know what to think. And if it was our daughter, it would be a kind gesture to –"

"What're you talking about? If that was Julie in there, I wouldn't want Joe McCoy within a mile of her."

She half rolled her eyes and looked away. "You know what I mean. It ain't his fault his parents are losers. He sure as hell didn't pick them."

Eric sighed again and slumped in his seat. "I hope he's all right."

"I do, too."

After a few minutes, Eric started shaking his leg and Tami had to rest a hand on his knee to make him hold still. About a half hour passed and there was no sign of either parent, so Eric got to his feet and began to meander about, peering at the various pieces of mediocre watercolor art on display. He scowled at one that was a series of blue streaks suggesting the ocean. Grace could paint better than that. Tami was distracted by her phone, probably texting Julie as well, though she looked tired. "Hey, I'm gonna go get us some coffee, all right?"

"All right," Tami replied, her voice distant as she squinted at her phone screen.

He tried not to smirk at her expression and wandered to a hall and peered down, looking for the elevator. Realizing that he'd been turned around on his gallery tour of crappy art, he found the right hallway and started down, only to stop in his tracks when he found a police officer taking down a statement from none other than Joe McCoy. He was torn between turning around and eavesdropping, so instead he did both. The elevators were at the end of the hall and as he strolled towards them, he could hear what was being said.

"I was inside, watching a game," Joe was saying. The tall man was so focused on what the cop was writing down that he didn't notice Eric coming.

"And when did you first find out that your son had been injured?"

"I heard a car peeling out," Joe said, rubbing one of his eyes with his hand. "And then I remembered J.D. was supposed to be on his way home. When he didn't come in right away, I checked outside for his car. Instead, I... I found him..." Joe's voice cracked with tears.

Eric looked at the ground as he strode past, but when he glanced up, he found Joe staring at him with a sour look.

"And what was his condition at that time?" the officer asked, his voice soft.

"Unconscious," Joe replied, composing himself.

Eric paused outside the elevators and pressed the button.

"Just a moment," Joe said to the cop before stepping over to the coach. "Coach Taylor, what exactly are you doing here?"

"I didn't want to interrupt you, but Tami and I heard the news," Eric replied, forcing himself to meet Joe's gaze. "I'm real sorry, Joe. Truly."

Joe's brow was furrowed as he nodded, sizing Eric up. "Uh-huh. I don't want you anywhere near my kid. You got that?"

"Mr. McCoy?" the police officer prompted. "If you don't mind?"

Joe nodded and stepped back over to the cop as the elevator light glowed.

"You said you think a Mexican gang attacked your son. Do you have any evidence to support that?"

The elevator door opened and Eric stepped in, shaking his head.

"Look, my son is white and was alone. He might as well have had a target on his –"

The rest of Joe's answer was cut off as the doors to the elevator swished shut. His stomach tightened as he recalled Joe's warning to keep away from his son, as if he'd somehow had a hand in harming him. All he'd ever done was try to help and he was getting more than sick of the man's smug face leering at him. He knew the coach had a certain affection for his son outside of his talent on the field, for the boy and his mother had spent a weekend staying with them. And now Joe was trying to use his worry against him, as if J.D. was a pawn.

Not a pawn, but a knight, he thought as the elevator slowed. And Joe McCoy was a chess player. Eric knew enough about the other man to know that the story he'd just told the cops wasn't the truth. Joe was far too controlling to not be checking up on his son the moment the boy was late. If he suspected any tension on J.D.'s leash, he always yanked hard.

Eric returned several minutes later with two cups of coffee and Joe was no longer in the hallway. Heading back towards Tami, he glanced into J.D.'s room, but all he could see was a form in the bed, turned away from the door. "Hey," he said as he reached his wife.

"Oh, thank you, hun," Tami said, looking up from her phone to take the offered cup of coffee. "Did you just see Joe?"

"Yeah, I did."

She lowered her voice so they wouldn't be overheard as he sat back down. "CPS just showed up and requested that he be taken to the police station for questioning since he's got no alibi for where he was last night or some thing like that."

"I heard him telling the cop that he thinks J.D. was attacked by a Mexican gang."

Tami let out a disapproving sound. "Jules just told me that the rumor around school is that it was players on a rival team."

Eric raised his brows. "A rival team?"

"Yeah, trying to take down the Panthers' star quarterback."

"That's ridiculous. He isn't that high-profile."

Tami shrugged. "He's well off, too. Could've been a mugging."

"Yeah, well, it could've been a whole lot of things but I just passed by his room and his mom isn't in there so I think we should go."

"Katie's not there?"

Eric shook his head.

"All right, give me a second." Tami rose and meandered to the corner of the room where she clicked through her contacts on her phone. After pressing on one, she held it to her ear. "Hey, Katie, it's Tami Taylor."

Eric watched his wife intently as she grimaced at the other woman's reaction, but the expression was more one of empathy than offense.

"I am so sorry, sweetie... I know, I know... Eric and I are at the hospital right now and we just thought – I don't know... oh... all right. Oh no. All right. Well, I'm not really supposed to see... yeah. Yeah, I can do that for you. Sure thing, sweetheart. I'll tell him. And again, I am so sorry." She made a funny face then looked at her phone as if she thought she'd lost the connection, only to flip it shut and walk back over to Eric with a sigh.

"How's she doing?"

"Not good. She's all the way in New York, visiting her mother. All the flights are grounded because of a snow storm so she can't leave any time soon."

"And Joe's being held for questioning."

Tami locked gazes with him with sad brown eyes.

"Doesn't he have any other relatives or something? How can no one be here to see him?"

Tami pursed her lips, glancing at the nursing station. "Katie asked me to tell him she'd be here as soon as she could."

"Well, we're not supposed to go in there."

"I know. But what they don't know won't hurt them."

"Now, listen, honey –"

"His dad isn't around and he needs to hear it from someone," she said as she picked up the bouquet from the coffee table. "I'll slip in and out before anyone notices."

"I don't think this is a good idea. They have these rules for a reason."

"Stand guard," she muttered, her eyes on the nursing station. She waited until the man on call turned his back to the room to put away a file. Striding quickly, she slipped into the hallway, grimacing from the click of her heels and ignoring her husband's sigh. She lightly knocked on the door to J.D.'s room before entering.

His back was to her and he was breathing slow yet steady. Her flowers were the first, apparently, for his room was void of get well gifts, which made her heart sink a little. Realizing that he was probably asleep, she bit back her greeting and tip toed over to his window, feeling slightly awkward for intruding. She set the flowers down on the sill then glanced over to him and was glad that his eyes were shut, for the pleasant expression immediately left her face.

A darkening, motley bruise marred the left side of the boy's face by his eye, and in the center of the bruise was a row of sutures in a half circle. Though he was in a hospital gown and she couldn't see his chest, she could tell by his awkward position that he was terribly stiff. His skin was ashen and when she noticed two emptied bags of blood hanging on an IV stand, she knew why. His right arm was bandaged and in a brace, yet more bruising was creeping out from underneath. She let out a soft sound of disbelief. That was his throwing arm.

He looked so peaceful and weak that she held a hand to her mouth, for in his soft features she could still see so much boy in him. How anyone could do this to another human being, to another mother's child was beyond fathom. There were red indentations on his cheek from a breathing mask that he appeared to have tugged off his face to fruitlessly blow air against his neck, and his heart monitor beeped in a slow, peaceful tone. Despite the rude words of his parents, despite his father's unabashed attempts to force her husband out of his job, never in her life would she have hoped to make them suffer by their child being in such a state. "I'm so sorry," she whispered, wishing there were something she could do to help heal him.

She didn't dare wake him when he looked so fragile and instead rummaged through her purse to try to find a pen and paper to leave him a note, glancing at the door to make sure she hadn't been spotted as she did so. Her phone vibrated as she received a message, and the insistent sound made the boy stir. Tami hastily grabbed her cell and turned off vibrate before shooting J.D. an apologetic look to find that his eyes had opened to small slits. She smiled as she tucked some of her blond hair behind her ear, but his eyes were so unfocused that she wasn't even sure he was actually awake.

"Hey sweet pea," she whispered and at her voice, he opened his eyes as much as he could with his left eye being half swollen shut from the bruising. His blue gaze became sharper as he focused on her, and she felt her armor slide into place as she worried that he would be upset at the sight of her. Despite how well he and Katie had got along with the Taylors while they stayed with them, she knew that J.D. was still upset with her and Eric for having called CPS on his father, and the few occasions she had seen him since, he had been distant, which she knew was about as rude as he would get to an adult. But there was no anger in his eyes as he looked at her, and she realized that his gaze was glassy and sluggish from painkillers and sedatives and that he might not even recognize her at all. "J.D., it's Mrs. Taylor," she said, taking a step towards him. "Can you hear me?"

He nodded but didn't lift his cheek off the pillow, and his expression hadn't changed so she figured he wasn't about to scream at her to get our just yet.

"I just wanted to bring you this," she said, gesturing to the flowers. "And to let you know that Eric and Julie and I hope you heal real quick. Okay?"

"Okay," he whispered, his voice hoarse from disuse and dryness as his eyes drifted to the flowers.

Tami smiled at the soft reply and felt her armor fall away. "I am so sorry, sweetheart. You don't deserve this. Not one bit." She stepped right up to his bed and watched his eyes track her without lifting his chin, and she knew from his reluctance to move and the blood he'd received that his injuries were much worse than she had thought when she had first heard that he was in the hospital. "But they're gonna take real good care of you here, okay?"

He sighed nearly inaudibly and let his eyes drift away from hers, and as he cast them downwards, she wondered if he was falling asleep again.

"J.D., I talked to your mom."

His eyes suddenly brightened and he looked to her. "Where is she?" he asked.

"She's still in New York with your grandma, but she's gonna be here real soon. There's a snowstorm and once the runways are clear, she'll be on the first flight to Texas. She said to tell you that she loves you and wishes she was with you right now."

J.D. pressed his lips together tightly as he swallowed, and she felt something in her chest constrict as the hope that had lit his eyes began to fade away.

"I know y'all have probably already answered this, but do you remember what happened? Do you remember who did this to you?"

His eyes narrowed as they began to shimmer and she worried he was in pain as the heart monitor began beeping faster, but after a few heartbeats, his lip trembled and she realized he was crying.

"Oh," Tami sighed, cocking her head. "You don't have to say a thing, hun."

"I want my mom," he said as tears brimmed over his eyes and slipped onto his cheeks, and the youthful crack in his voice made her throat tight.

"Oh, sweetheart." She rested her hand over his and squeezed it, surprised by how cold he was.

He let out a soft sob, closing his eyes. Tami felt her own eyes beginning to mist over. Just moments before, she'd been tense and worried that he'd lash out at her, that he would try to blame her for his parents not being with him. But as he sobbed again, she realized that he was too weak to even care about crying in front of her, much less to wear the mask of the cocky athlete that his father had taught him to be. The layers of pretending were stripped away, and all she saw before her was a quivering child who had looked into the precipice of death and was filled with cold dread. "I want my mom," he whispered again before taking a hiccoughing breath.

"I know, baby, I know. And you know what? I'm gonna stay right here, okay?" She reached up to tuck a curl off his forehead and he flinched at the brush of her fingers. She tried to ignore his response, even as it made one of her own tears fall. "I'm not going anywhere, all right?"

He nodded minutely, trying to blink away tears that clung to his lashes.

"And your dad's gonna be back real soon. He just had to go away for a few minutes to answer some questions."

J.D. took a deep, shuddering breath, making him wince as he tried to stop crying.

"Do you need anything? Can I get you anything?"

"How long will it take her to fly here?" he asked, and she had to blink to clear her eyes.

"Um, a... few hours, I'd say."

He clenched his jaw at her response, his eyes welling up with tears again, and she had to wipe at her eyes to keep her make-up from smearing at the sight of such raw misery and yearning. She tried to force a laugh. "My make-up's gonna get all funky." She plucked a tissue from a nearby box and wiped under her eyes before folding the tissue and gently wiping off his exposed cheek, mindful of the bruise, and this time he didn't flinch. "I know you're afraid. I would be, too. But everything's gonna be okay. All right? Don't you worry about it."

He nodded a little then screwed his eyes shut as his breath hitched in his chest, letting out an involuntary whimper.

"Are you all right?" she asked, looking him over. "Can you breathe okay?"

He reached up his left arm with half the speed of a functional person and couldn't seem to get his fingers to work around his breathing mask, so Tami helped him slip it back over his mouth and nose.

"Want me to go get a doctor?"

He shook his head no, his eyes still glistening. "Can you please tell my mom to come?" he asked, his voice muffled as his breath fogged the mask.

Tami nodded, swallowing hard. "She knows. She knows, hun, and she'll be here as soon as she can. And until she does, I'm gonna come here to visit you, okay?"

He nodded, but as he did so, his eyes lost focus again for a moment and she wondered if he was asking her the same thing for reassurance or because he couldn't remember asking before.

"You just get some sleep, all right?" She squeezed his hand again. "I'm gonna be right here. I won't let anything happen to you."

She thought she saw his shoulder's relax, though he didn't verbally respond. After a short while, his eyes slipped shut and his breathing became even, if a little wheezy. Tami stood where she was, holding his cool hand in hers, wishing that Katie was on her way already and feeling a burst of anger flare up at the other woman and at Joe. She knew it wasn't her place, but she didn't feel that either parent was capable enough to help their son through this.

Listening to his steady, wheezing breathing and feeling his fingers twitch in hers every now and then as he slept, Tami vowed to do everything she could to protect him. Things would be better once Katie was home, but something in the other woman's voice had unsettled Tami when they spoke earlier. Katie had kept mentioning how upset and worried she was, but never once said anything about how tortured her child must be feeling. It was in the woman's vein nature to spin every situation to get attention for herself, but Tami had been wrong to think that she would stoop so low as to try to gain sympathy for her son's fight to live. Her selfishness and Joe's history of abuse rendered both parents incapable in Tami's mind, and she knew that while Katie's presence would bring J.D. comfort, it would bring him just as much tension as she manipulated the situation to her benefit.

Tami had seen glimmers of both Joe and Katie's manipulation in J.D.'s personality, but she knew that he was so young that he was mimicking his parents without thought. The fact that he tried so hard to make them proud on the field, to win their approval told her that at his core, the boy was seeking to good in whatever way he had been directed.

Tami remembered being unsettled by the starkness of the McCoy's home. Katie was a kind and sweet woman, but she spent more time framing pictures of her son than spending time with him. The photos and trophies that adorned the walls seemed invisible to J.D., but Tami saw them for what they were: Thinly-veiled reassurance to the outside world that Katie and Joe were good parents, rather than an actual celebration of their child. Joe had proven that much to be true when Tami and Eric had seen him hit his son all those months ago.

The memory of that night and the swelling bruise on J.D.'s cheek made her heart begin to race. Drugged or not, the teen had just laid bare his fear and anguish and she took the gesture for what it was: a plea for help. Her throat tightened as she thought of how little she could actually do to protect him, and how his parents would do all they could to push her away again. Her frustration frothed over into her chest and she knew at that moment that if Joe McCoy was found guilty, she would give him a shiner to match his son's, or worse. "I'll be right back, hun," she whispered, even though she knew the boy couldn't hear her.

She gently let go of his hand and tip toed from the room to find her husband. Eric was slumped in an armchair in the lobby, looking half asleep, but roused himself when he saw her emerge and wave to him. Making sure the nurse at the front desk was busy writing down a phone message, he rose and met her in the hallway. He furrowed his brow at the tightness of her face, and without a word, she wrapped her arms around him and let out a sob into his shoulder.

**PLEASE LEAVE COMMENTS :)**


	3. Mask

**BROKEN WINGS**

**CHAPTER 3: MASK**

Tami sighed as she and Eric lay in bed, staring at the ceiling. "You need to stop thinking about it, babe," Eric finally said, snaking a hand over to hers to squeeze it.

Tami shook her head. "I can't. I can't just... get something like that out of my head. All I keep thinking is that he's terrified and he's completely alone."

"His dad will be out on bail tomorrow morning."

"Eric, they know he's lying. CPS won't let him within a hundred feet of J.D.," she said, lolling her head to the side to look at him.

Eric shrugged. "Good."

"Good? You think a father practically beating his son to death is good?"

Eric furrowed his brow. "Of course not. You know that's not what I meant."

She sighed and rubbed her eyes.

"Listen, I know how you're feeling. It's frustrating as hell. But we've just got to accept it."

"I can't accept it, hun. You should've seen the look on his face. He looked like he was five-years old."

Eric was quiet for a long while. "What're you suggesting we do?"

"I don't know. I mean, there isn't much of anything we can do. I'm gonna go back there tomorrow after school and visit him again."

"Have you heard anything yet from Katie?"

Tami shook her head. "What I can't figure out is if Joe did it, why on earth would he break his throwing arm?"

"Maybe he was jealous."

"Jealous?"

"Or angry or something. Did you know he and Katie were getting a divorce?"

Tami furrowed her brow. "Really?"

"Buddy Garrity claims that she went off to visit her mom for support while she hired a lawyer."

Tami stared at the ceiling, her tone taking on a hint of annoyance. "She left her son with the man she was divorcing, who she knows is abusive, and ran off to –"

"Well, she left him so he could keep playing football. He was gonna start the Homecoming game on Saturday."

"He'll be lucky if he's able to play for Homecoming next year."

Eric was quiet and she knew she'd struck a chord. Looking over at him, she found him staring at the ceiling. "He doesn't deserve this."

"No, he doesn't."

* * *

When J.D. awoke again, his room was dark but there was a rectangle of shrinking light on the wall as the door was eased shut. Blinking, he realized that a nurse had been checking on him as he slept. He tried to find his voice to ask her or him to stop and to see if his mom was there yet, but his throat was dry and the effort was making his chest hurt so he gave up. Closing his eyes, he let out a soft sigh, filled with the sensation that time had passed.

He knew something had happened while he was awake but had trouble sorting through his jumbled thoughts until he alighted upon the kind smile in Tami's eyes. Their brown hues were warm and genuine and strong and made him feel safe. He wanted to feel safe again. But Tami was gone and his parents were gone and he was alone again.

The darkness of the room felt palpable, and as he opened his eyes again, he thought he saw shadows shifting and coming towards him. One was shaped like his father. He tried to tell himself that they weren't real, that it was just his eyes playing tricks on him, but they shifted and fled and flickered so much that he closed his eyes again. He was safer in his own darkness. Where no one could abandon him, for no one else was there. And he wondered if this was what the rest of his life would be like. He'd rather die than spend the rest of his days imprisoned by shadows.

* * *

Tami let out a deep breath as she signed a form and handed it to her admin with a smile before leaning back in her chair and folding her arms over her chest. After the man slipped out, Tami got up and eased the door shut, sidestepping the box of cards and well wishing gifts the teachers had gathered from the students for her to take to the hospital that afternoon. Grabbing her cell, she scrolled through her contacts and selected "Katie McCoy." She had talked herself out of this several other times during the day, but it was past lunch, she was hungry, and her sense of propriety was fast crumbling at the thought of J.D. having been alone all day. She texted Katie, asking the other woman if she was on her way back to Texas yet. She didn't get a reply until three that afternoon when Katie said that the planes were still grounded.

Switching on her monitor, Tami did a quick internet search and furrowed her brow when she saw that the snowstorm in New York had cleared up and that flights were leaving at regular intervals. "You've got to be kidding me," she muttered then called Katie before she thought twice about it.

"Tami, now's not a good time," Katie said as she answered the phone.

"Alright, I'm sorry, it's just that I was checking the weather reports and the runways in New York are clear."

Katie was quiet.

"Hun, are you there?"

"Yes, I'm here."

"Well are y'all gonna head out soon or what?"

"How's J.D.?"

Tami furrowed her brow at the strained tone of the other woman's voice. "Not good. He's hurting for you. What's going on?"

"This is just... this is really hard for me."

"I can only imagine."

"I'm not ready for this yet. I just... it'll break my heart to see him."

"It'll break your heart to see him?" Tami repeated, incredulous. "My God, will you listen to yourself right now? How the hell do you think he feels?"

"You don't understand."

"You're right, I don't," she said, not even bothering to keep her voice from rising. "Look, I know you're going through a difficult time right now but come on. Grow up. He is your son and he needs you. I don't care if you're going through a divorce or if you're parting the Red Sea – your son was nearly beaten to death and you can't even take the effort to come home?"

"Don't you dare judge me, Tami. You have no idea what life has been like ever since you stuck your stupid nose in our –"

"Oh, please, spare me the lecture."

"Don't call me again."

There was a clicking sound then Katie hung up. Tami pulled the phone away from her ear and glared at the screen. "That self-centered bitch."

She slid the phone across the desk away from her as the bell rang, sounding the end of the school day. She stood and faced the window, peering at what she could see through the blinds, trying to calm her pulse and accept her anger at Katie before trying to let it go.

There was a quiet knock at the door and Tami turned back around. "Come in."

A young redhead peeked in, offering her a small smile as she tucked her hair behind her ear, a book bag slung on one shoulder and an envelope in her hand. "Um, hi," she said quietly. "I heard you were taking stuff to the hospital for J.D. so I just wanted to give you this for him." She held out her card but didn't cross the threshold of Tami's office, as if afraid of being in the same room as the principal.

Tami smiled. "That is so sweet of you, hun, thank you." Stepping over to the girl, she realized that she'd seen her with J.D. before, walking to class and sitting together at lunch. She wasn't a striking beauty like Lyla Garrity or Tyra Collette, but her brown eyes were warm and the dusting of freckles across her cheeks gave her a friendly, open appearance.

She fidgeted with her bag after she gave Tami the card and watched the older woman set it in the box of gifts for the boy. Her voice was timid. "Do you know how he's doing?"

Tami sighed as she straightened. "Yeah, I went to see him yesterday. He's not doing too great but I think he'll be all right."

The teen nodded and averted her gaze, but her mouth was tight as if she was trying to hide her reaction from Tami.

"Once he's out of the ICU he can get visitors, you know."

"Yeah," she said, hesitantly meeting Tami's gaze again. "Well, could you tell him... could you tell him that Madison says hi and that I hope he gets better soon?"

Tami nodded.

Madison let out an uneasy laugh. "I guess it says the same thing in my card, but –"

"I'll tell him, hun. I'll let him know that you came by just to make sure he got your card, too."

Madison smiled. "Thank you, ma'am."

"You're welcome. Take care."

The redhead smiled, and Tami thought the expression brightened her face more than one on the face of a young lady with striking features. "Thanks, you too."

She turned and left and Tami shot the card in the box an amused look.

* * *

The nurse at the desk told Tami that J.D. had been moved to a private room and out of the ICU, which meant he was recovering well. Visiting hours were over in an hour and a half, so she wrote down his new room number and headed for the elevator. She knew J.D. would ask her about his mom again and what was she supposed to tell him? That his mother was a flake and wasn't coming any time soon? That she was so selfish that she couldn't put his needs before hers? Stepping out on the correct floor, she scanned the numbers for his room.

She raised her fist and knocked on the door before entering and smiled when she saw that not only was J.D. awake today, but he was sitting up a little more, his expression alert. Almost normal. A corner of his mouth lifted a little in a return smile, but the gesture was as awkward as it was genuine. Tami cleared her throat as she stepped in, frowning when she saw that his left eye was now completely swollen shut. "How're you doing, hun?"

"I'm tired," he said, and his voice had lost the hoarseness of the day before. Glancing to his bedside, she was happy to find a small pitcher of water and a glass and knew that if they were letting him drink on his own, he must be getting stronger. But the pitcher sat beside a tray of food that looked untouched.

Setting down her purse, she sat down in a tattered armchair beside his bed. "You're out of the ICU. That's good."

He nodded a little, watching her with eyes that dulled, and she realized that he had appeared so alert when she first came in because he was hoping that she was Katie.

"Well, now that you're upstairs, you can have visitors who don't have to sneak in. Has anyone come to see you yet?"

"Just nurses," he said.

"Well, we're all really worried about you at school," she said as she took off her coat. "Just about everyone's worried about you." She held up the box of gifts. "Madison says hi and that she hopes you get better soon."

He brightened then tried to damper his expression and she turned her back to him to unpack some of the gifts, hiding her smile.

"Who told people to send that stuff?"

"No one. Well, the teachers announced that they'd be happy to take stuff to you." She glanced at him over her shoulder and saw him scanning the cards she was pulling out.

"Everyone at school hates me."

"J.D., you know that isn't true." She finished unpacking and turned to face him.

"The only people who are my friends like me because I can play football and my dad has money," he said, meeting her gaze with his one functional eye.

Tami sighed. "Hun, I really don't think that's true, but even if it is... teenagers can be cruel. People can be cruel. They get jealous and tease and do all kinds of stupid things."

"Were you teased when you were in high school?"

Tami pressed her lips together and hesitated. "No, I was a cheerleader." She wrinkled her nose. "I was the one doing the teasing."

A small smile curled his lips. "You? Teasing?"

She nodded, her nose still wrinkled. "I know. It's awful, isn't it?"

"You're lying."

"No, I'm not. I was a stuck up, pretentious bitch in high school. I'd make fun of people and talk behind their back and spread rumors because there were just some people that I..." She sighed. "I was jealous of them. And I was so stupid and self-absorbed at the time that I didn't realize that was why I didn't like them."

He was quiet as he swallowed and let his eyes drift away from hers for a while, contemplating what she had said. "Yeah," he sighed, the huskiness returning to his voice as he lowered it. "I guess I'm that way sometimes, too."

"Hun, what do you have to be jealous of?"

"Lots of things."

"Like what?" She knew the answer, but she was also a trained counselor and knew to wait and see what his response would be.

He shrugged one shoulder.

"You're the star quarterback of one of the best high school football teams in the country. You're smart and get good grades and stay out of trouble. You're handsome."

He cringed a little at that last claim and she thought she saw him blush. "I don't..." he began quietly. "I mean... I've asked my parents for a dog for as long as I can remember but my mom doesn't want to have to clean up the hair. So after she left to visit Grandma last week, I brought one home from the pound. It had really short hair and everything and wasn't gonna make a mess. But my dad made me take it back."

Tami nodded, her brow furrowed as she listened. "You're jealous of people who have dogs?"

A corner of his mouth lifted again in a crooked smile. "No. That would be dumb."

She shook her head. "No, it wouldn't."

He met her gaze again when she agreed with him, and she had to fight to keep the same expression on her face when she noticed how painfully fragile his composure was, as if his face was full of tiny little cracks that might shatter at any sudden movement of thought. "Julie's pretty lucky to have you as a mom," he whispered.

"J.D.," she said with a sigh, reaching out to rest her hand on his. "I'm your friend. You know that, right?"

He nodded.

"I might not be part of your family, and I know your folks are still real mad at me and Eric, but I wanna be here for you. Your dad's not allowed to see you right now and your mom's still across the country. You shouldn't be alone."

His brows twitched together the tiniest bit. "Mom's still in New York?"

Tami hesitated and squeezed his hand. "Yeah, they're having really bad snowstorms up there. She hasn't been able to fly out yet," she lied.

She watched his eyes slide away from hers and harden, and she realized he was trying to put on a mask to hide his disappointment and seal the cracks in his facade. The shift was practiced and she knew he'd done it a thousand times before, and the fluidity of the change unsettled her as much as his will to put on a brave face before her. She wondered if he even remembered crying in front of her not twenty-four hours ago.

"Hey," she said softly, drawing his attention back to her. "She loves you very much and is very worried about you."

"Then why hasn't she called?"

Tami glanced at the phone sitting by his bed and straightened. "You mean you haven't even talked to her?"

He shook his head no. "Someone called a few hours ago, but it was some old lady trying to reach her husband. She kept calling me Alfred."

"Maybe they've given out the wrong number, then."

"No. The cops keep calling to talk to me, too."

Tami sighed. "Then the phone lines must be down in New York –"

"Not cell phones."

Tami bit her lip for a moment, feeling his hand tense slightly beneath hers. His sky blue gaze was hungry for any explanation or excuse that would exonerate his mother's cruel behavior, but Tami had nothing to offer. "You have every right to be angry. Okay? Every right. But if your mom isn't here, I'm sure she has a damn good reason." She blinked a few times as her vision blurred unexpectedly at the way she was twisting the truth. "Because I know what it's like to love your child, and there ain't no way she'd willingly leave you here alone."

His eyes were beginning to glimmer, as well, even as he fought valiantly to uphold his facade. "Then why won't she call?"

She shook her head. "I don't know, sweet pea. I don't know, but I do know that it's nothing you did."

He searched her misty eyes as his shimmered. He looked as if he was trying to tell her something, something he didn't yet understand, for there was a yearning in his gaze that dug straight to his tumultuous core. He parted his lips to speak but just then, someone knocked on the door.

Tami wiped at her eyes as two detectives entered. Sniffling, she glanced back to J.D. and saw his mask slide back into place at the sight of the two men. "Are you Mrs. McCoy?" one of the detectives asked as he entered.

"Um, no," Tami said, letting go of J.D.'s hand as she rose. "I'm Tami Taylor. Principal of Dillon High." She held out her hand and each detective shook it in turn.

"It's a pleasure. I'm Detective Hertzer and this is Detective Malone." He looked to J.D., who swallowed hard as he fought to look impassive. "How're you feeling, J.D.?"

"Okay," he said.

"You remember anything yet?"

The boy shook his head no.

"Just hang in there, kid." Detective Hertzer looked to Tami. "Mind if we ask you a few questions outside?"

"Not at all." She shot J.D. a parting smile as she followed the two men out into the hallway and waited until the door was shut behind her before speaking. "How can I help y'all?"

Detective Malone pulled out a notebook and pen. "Our records indicate that you were the one who first placed a call to CPS several months ago."

Tami nodded. "Do you really think Joe did this?"

"We're exploring all options, Mrs. Taylor," Hertzer explained. "J.D. doesn't remember much about what happened. Temporary amnesia is common among victims of violent crimes. Especially attacks of this nature."

She shook her head. "I'm sorry. 'This nature?'"

"J.D.'s father didn't find him until a few hours after the boy had been attacked. If he hadn't called an ambulance right away, J.D. would've bled to death internally."

"Oh my God," Tami breathed, holding a hand over her mouth.

"Broken ribs had pierced his organs and they did emergency surgery. The anesthetic probably didn't help his memory at all, either," Detective Hertzer said. "And frankly, we're looking at Mr. Joe McCoy as suspect number one. Since you were the one who placed the call to CPS, we realize that you were aware of, or at least suspected abuse?"

"Yeah, I mean..." She pulled her hand away from her mouth. "I know the man can be a controlling, emotionally abusive prick but J.D. said that last time was the only time he'd ever hit him. Do ya'll think he'd really go this far? I mean, this isn't just an argument. This is..."

Detective Malone glanced up from his note-taking. "He could be charged with attempted murder."

**PLEASE LEAVE REVIEWS :)**


	4. Heartbreak

**BROKEN WINGS**

**CHAPTER 4: HEARTBREAK**

Tami blinked at the detectives, shock warring with satisfaction over the thought of Joe McCoy paying his dues. "What about... what about what Joe said himself. That he thought it was a Mexican gang? Because I don't understand why Joe would break his arm. That's his throwing arm and football's about all that matters to that man."

"There were no stab wounds that are consistent with Mexican gang attacks. Nor do they usually occur so close to the victim's home. J.D.'s also right handed, so he could've been injured in self-defense."

Tami let out a sigh. "God... Is Joe out of jail?"

"He posted bail this morning," Hertzer said. "But he's not allowed to visit his son right now. CPS is working with us on the case. They've brought in a psychologist who has already spoken to Mr. McCoy. Being that J.D. is a minor, she can't speak to him until his mother is present, so we're waiting for Mrs. McCoy before we continue."

"Does she know that?" Tami asked.

Hertzer nodded. "We've left her several messages but she hasn't called us back in twenty-four hours. If she doesn't cooperate soon, we'll have the NYPD step in."

"Has your school received any threats from rival football players?" Detective Malone asked.

Tami shook her head. "No, no... that's ridiculous. Wait, are you telling me that you've already arrested this boy's father and now you're going to arrest his mother?"

"No, however her behavior is suspicious and we'll want to ask her a few questions."

"Well to be honest, I talked with her briefly this afternoon and she just sounds... overwhelmed. I think she feels like if she stays far away, all of this trouble will disappear."

Hertzer furrowed his brow. "Interesting."

Malone flipped his notebook shut. "Thank you very much for your time, Mrs. Taylor."

"If you think of anything," Hertzer said as he tugged out his card and handed it to her. "Give us a call."

She nodded and read the card as the two men headed back down the hall. She stuck the card in her pocket, letting a sigh hiss out through her teeth as she thought of how much worse both of J.D.'s parents were making the situation. She wondered if she should warn Katie that the NYPD might show up at her mother's house, but the woman had dug her own grave and Tami was so angry with her for not helping her own son that she figured the woman deserved whatever wake-up call she could get. Knocking on the door, she came back inside the hospital room to find the teen watching her with his good eye keen. "What'd they say?" he asked.

"Oh, they just wanted to know a few things, is all," she replied with a smile as she headed back over to her purse on the armchair by his bed.

"Like what?"

She shook her head as she shrugged. "Technical stuff."

"Because you called CPS before," he said, and as she looked to him, she realized that there was no use hiding the truth from him. He was old enough to hunt out answers on his own, and living with a father as unpredictable and controlling as his had undoubtedly taught him the art of reading people at a young age. Gauging his father's mood in a given situation was probably how he had avoided more outbursts of violence in the past.

She grabbed her keys out of her purse the sat down on the arm of the chair, resting her hands in her lap. "All right, J.D., I'm just gonna be honest with you. You're gonna learn this sooner or later."

He shrugged slightly but his gaze was tinted with the tension of anxiety. "Okay."

"They think your father attacked you."

It took a heartbeat, but a corner of his mouth lifted in a practiced, incredulous smile. "He wouldn't do that."

"He's telling some story that you were attacked by a gang and they don't believe it."

He shook his head. "He wouldn't lie to the police."

"Hun, I'm just telling you what they told me."

He diverted his gaze and picked at the blanket with his uninjured arm.

Tami cocked her head. "You really don't remember anything about that night?"

"No," he snapped. "I don't remember."

"Nothing at all?"

He pressed his lips together and focused on the pieces of lent he was plucking.

"Because if you remember anything at all, even if it doesn't make sense, it might help the detectives help you."

"They're not gonna help me," he muttered, looking back up at her. "They just want to get someone in trouble because a rich quarterback got beat up. That's not supposed to happen, right? I'm supposed to be the one beating other people up."

Tami furrowed her brow. "No one's supposed to be beating anyone up. Why would you say that?"

"So what if it was my dad? If I told the cops that, they'd send him to prison. He and my mom are already getting divorced because of me. I'm not gonna ruin his life even more."

"You haven't ruined anything, J.D."

"I'm not blind."

"No, you've just got blinders on," she replied, raising her voice.

J.D. shook his head and looked away from her.

"Listen to me, J.D. I know this is hard but if your father did this to you, then you need to speak up. Do you know why?" When he refused to look at her, she sat down on the chair. "Because it will happen again, that's why." He shook his head and looked in the opposite direction as her. "Yes, it will. You know it will."

"Just shut up," he muttered.

"He needs help, and he ain't gonna get that unless you speak up. Unless you tell them what he did. I'll help you if you want, hun, but –"

"You're not my mom," he said, looking her in the eye. "I don't owe you anything."

"This isn't for me, J.D., don't you see that?" She narrowed her eyes and a part of her made note of how easily he was diverting the conversation. "That man has got you brainwashed. You don't even have your own name."

His mocking, incredulous fake smile was back. "I don't have my own name?"

"Doesn't the J in J.D. stand for Joseph?"

The smile slipped from his face.

"He nearly killed you. He nearly killed you and if that isn't a red flag to you, then I don't know what is. He treats you like a god damn football."

J.D. pursed his lips, struggling to maintain his composure. She saw his jaw quiver as he clenched it and recognized a chink in his armor. She didn't want to hurt his feelings any more than they already were, but if she had to make him hurt to realize that he was being hurt, then she was more than willing, so she attacked the crack her words had chipped.

"You're not a football, honey, and you're not just a football player. You're phenomenal, everyone can see that, but that's only a part of who you are. You've let that man define you for too long. You've gotta spread your wings and find what it is that you want out of life."

"You're just saying this because I'm not gonna be able to play again."

"No, J.D. I'm saying this because you're living your life for someone else. And that's not all right. You have so much to offer and it's not fair for you to spend so much time with your wings pinned to your side like this. You've spent so much time trying to please your parents that you forgot about yourself."

"There's nothing wrong with making my parents proud."

"There is when it's costing you. You're young, you should be making mistakes and growing up. Not trying to fit into the little peg your parents have cut out for you. I know they think they're doing well by you but frankly, they're both selfish people."

He blinked several times and shook his head. "Don't talk about them like that."

"I spoke to your mom this afternoon," she said quietly, feeling sick to her stomach as his expression shifted from defensive to open, and she knew she was about to crush his hope. "There is no snow storm."

A thin line formed between his brows. "What?"

"The runways are clear. Your mom's not coming because... she's just not coming. She's got some issues she needs to sort out and I think she's terrified of seeing you hurt and knowing that she put you in that position in the first place."

"I don't understand," he said, and his shoulders fell as he gave up the fight against the tears trying to pool in his good eye. "What do you mean she's not coming?"

Tami shook her head. "She's not coming, baby. She's... being selfish."

He blinked and a tear fell as he studied her, breathing shallowly as he tried to think up an ulterior explanation and failed. "Why... why would she do that?"

"I can't understand it any more than you do and it really ticks me off."

He took in several strained breaths and for a moment, she was worried he would hyperventilate. "She must hate me."

"No, J.D. this is –"

"They both hate me. And no matter how hard I try, I'm never good enough. If it's not how I throw the damn ball, it's how I dress or what I say or..." He shook his head, trailing off as his lip trembled and another tear escaped. "I just feel like they never hear me, no matter how loud I shout. She won't even come see me?" He asked again, a sob distorting his sentence and Tami rested her knuckles against her lips, trying to keep her own emotions in check. "Then I should've just died. I'm so disappointing that my dad wants to hurt me and my mom can't even look at me anymore. I should just kill myself."

"Don't you dare talk like that," she said, her voice firm with conviction. "Don't you dare."

He screwed his good eye shut as he shook with a silent sob, then reached behind him and yanked a pillow over his face, trying to hide. Trying to block out what his armor couldn't.

"Hey," she said quietly, but when he didn't respond, she rested her hand on his injured one. "There's no shame in crying."

J.D. let out a loud sob from behind the pillow as his shoulders shook, and the sound was so awful and made her heart feel so sick that Tami couldn't take it anymore. Getting up, she sat down on the mattress beside him then lay down on her side and wrapped her arm around his shoulder in a gentle hug. She could feel him tense at her touch but as she slipped her other arm under his neck, he turned towards her. The pillow slid off his face and he leaned against her shoulder, hugging her back as best he could as he let out another sob ridden with heartache.

"It's gonna be all right, honey," she whispered as she rubbed his back, but when she felt ribs then a layer of bandages, her throat tightened so much that she felt like she had swallowed something bruising and bitter. She let her own soft sob escape as she felt the fingers of his good hand clutch the back of her shirt, clinging to her as his tears wet her shoulder. "Shh."

She tried not to think about the fact that she'd been the one to reduce him to tears, but the thought was persistent and fought its way to the surface, bringing with it dangling chains of guilt that tried to coil around her heart. She had done what she thought was right, but feeling the boy's quivering form pressed up against her made it feel as if the world was upside down and that there was no right anymore.

After several long minutes, his sobs quieted and his breathing was interrupted by hitches in his chest from crying so much. She sniffled and gave him a gentle squeeze. "You know what?" She waited a few seconds but he didn't answer. "I think this was meant to happen. I do. As awful as it seems right now... I think this is God's way of teaching us who we really are. I think He or Fate or whatever you want to call it brings people into our lives who will upset things, because every time something is upset, we pick up the pieces and know more."

He loosened his grip on her shirt. "I'm such a coward," he whispered hoarsely.

"Honey, you are hardly sixteen-years old. I know you think you're old and tough but you are so very young, and if you weren't scared shitless right now, I'd be worried."

He sniffled a little she imagined that he might be smiling. "This really hurts," he said after a pause.

"I know. It hurts me, too."

"No, I mean, my ribs."

She let go of him and slowly sat up, mindful of where his body was as she gave him room to straighten again. "I'm sorry, hun."

He shook his head and grimaced as he tried to get comfortable again before wiping at his cheeks with the back of his good arm.

"Here." She offered him a glass of water and watched him drink the whole thing while she remained seated on the edge of his bed. "Gotta replace what you just lost," she said with a small smile, and when he didn't crack a smile of his own at her corny joke, she shook her head. "You're right, that was bad."

"I want everything to go away," he whispered as she returned the cup to his nightstand.

"I'm gonna do everything I can to help you."

"You don't have to."

"I care about you, hun. I care about you a lot, and so does Eric. And I know he feels the same way I do. So we're all gonna work together and we're gonna figure this out, okay?"

He nodded, tears clumping his lashes even though his eyes were clearing.

"You're not alone. Ever. And you are more than welcome in our home any time."

He wiped at his cheeks again. "Thank you."

"I know I'm not the same as having your mom around, but I'm in this for the long haul, and whatever you need, just ask. I ain't going anywhere until I know you're safe and cared for."

J.D. nodded and took in a shuddering breath, the skin around his eyes red from tears, looking exhausted. Tami knew that she didn't look much better with her mascara having stained her under eye, but she couldn't much find it in her to care right now, for the trust he had wept into her was making her heart brim with affection.

**PLEASE REVIEW :)**

**Reviews make me get excited and write faster, and since this is my first FNL fic, I am very anxious to hear opinions (especially since it is focused on a character most people don't like) so _please, please, PLEASE_, take a few seconds to let me know how I'm doing and share your thoughts! I'm trying to keep this as plausible as possible. Thank you! And to those who have already reviewed - _thank you so much!_ :)  
**


	5. The Chance to Make it Right

**BROKEN WINGS**

**CHAPTER 5: THE CHANCE TO MAKE IT RIGHT**

Eric Taylor leaned against the wall in the back of the room, keeping a small smile on his face as he watched J.D. laugh at Landry as the redhead accidentally unplugged something important. Or rather, tried to laugh. The poor kid's face was so swollen on one half that he could hardly smile. Seeing the cocky quarterback black and blue and using his all just to sit up and chat with his teammates was gutting the coach.

Tami had warned him that when she'd left earlier that afternoon, J.D. had been a weeping mess, so he'd been sure to call to give him some time to pull himself together before he brought over a hunk of the team and a few alumni to visit after practice. And if this was J.D. put together, he didn't want to see the teen falling apart. The boy was pale and holding himself unnaturally, as if trying to hide his discomfort, and there was something in the way he was observing his teammates that made Eric worry that the kid was afraid of them. Not of them, per se, but of their sudden movements.

"Seriously," Landry said. "The last thing I need right now is to get kicked out of this hospital."

"Then stop unplugging shit," Riggins said.

Landry gestured to the cord. "It was an accident."

"They shouldn't just leave important equipment out when they ain't using it," Matt said, peering at the heart monitor. "I think my grandma had one of these once."

"Oh, great," Landry said with mock disapproval. "That's really gonna make J.D. feel better. To tell him that he's as far gone as your grandma."

"I'm just saying, I recognize this thing is all."

"All right, y'all," Eric said, peeling away from the wall as the boys continued to joke around but the youngest among them didn't say anything. "Let's just leave the hospital gear alone. Can we do that?"

"Sure thing, Coach," Landry said with a little salute.

"How you doing?" Eric asked J.D., meeting the teen's gaze. "You doing all right? You need a break from these monkeys?"

J.D. shook his head no and shrugged at the same time, and Eric had no idea what that meant and smiled the tiniest bit.

"You trying to kick us out, Coach?" Rigging asked, sweeping his hair out of his eyes. "Seriously? We got here, what, five minute ago?"

"You guys can stay," J.D. finally said. "I don't mind."

"Yeah? You don't want some private time with all these love letters from your little girlfriends?" Landry asked as he picked up one of the cards Tami had displayed on the windowsill. Riggins and Matt let out conspiring whistles and J.D. shook his head but had enough sense to not show any hint of annoyance, or else the other boys would've teased him more.

"Hey," Eric said, drawing the boys' attention. "One of those cards is from me."

"Oh, shot down," Matt said with a laugh and Landry slowly nodded in agreement as he returned a card to its place.

"Hey, how 'bout that," Riggins said. "You like the card we picked out? It's got a chick in a bikini on the front."

"I haven't had the chance to look at any of them yet, actually," J.D. said, so Landry grabbed the one from the team and handed it to him. J.D. took it in his good hand, which was shaking, and Eric saw Landry and the other two teens pretend not to notice, even as they exchanged a glance when J.D. was busy reading what they had written. "You jerk," J.D. said with a crooked smile as he glanced up to Riggins.

Riggins shrugged. "Hey, I call it like I see it."

"What?" Matt asked. "What'd he write?"

"Wait, what?" Landry said, looking to Riggins in feigned shock. "You can write?"

"Shut up, ginger," Riggins quipped.

J.D. handed Matt the card and the older blonde read aloud. "J.D., hope you live it up at the hospital. Eat lots of jell-o and screw a nurse for me. #33." Matt shook his head as he returned the card. Riggins chuckled at his own joke.

"Really, Riggins, why you always gotta be so crass?" Landry asked.

"It's not crass, it's a joke because J.D. is so not..." Riggins blinked as he caught himself. "Well, I mean, no offence, kid, but you're so proper. That's why it's funny."

"Ain't nothing wrong with being proper," Eric said, unfolding his arms from over his chest.

"I don't care," J.D. offered, sounding pathetically earnest. "You can make fun of me."

"I wasn't trying to make fun of you," Riggins replied. "I just thought a joke might make you feel better."

"Don't listen to him," Landry muttered. "He's an insensitive jerk."

Eric was happy to see that the amused expression on J.D.'s face had lingered. While there was once a time when he'd seen the boy struggle to adjust to being around older kids and their sense of humor, he now fit in with their rapport.

"Seriously, Landry," Riggins said with a thinly-veiled smirk. "Why you gotta throw me under the bus like that?"

"All right, gentlemen," Eric said, stepping towards the group. "Let's give this boy some space. C'mon." He waved his arms to usher the teens towards the door.

"All right," Landry said, holding out a fist which J.D. matched with his good hand. "Seeya on the field, man."

"Yeah, seeya," J.D. replied, lightly bumping his fist with his.

Matt did the same. "Take care, all right?"

"I will."

"Hey," Riggins said, leaning over to whisper. "Get that nurse's number for me."

J.D. merely shook his head with a small smile as Riggins exited and Eric walked past. The older man paused by the door. "You need a break before I send in the next group?"

The smile faded from the teen's lips. "Who else is here?"

"Luke Cafferty, Vince, Julie. Some other girl I don't know with red hair. They're all out in the waiting room."

He nodded minutely and Eric couldn't tell if the boy's expression was one of timidity or if he was just overwhelmed.

"J.D., you okay? You don't have to see anyone else right now if you don't want to."

J.D. shook his head but didn't meet his gaze. "No, I'm all right."

"You sure?" Eric asked, unused to seeing the boy so deflated.

"Yeah," he nodded and looked up.

"Well all right then. I'll send them in for a few minutes."

"Okay."

As Eric slipped out of the room and headed for the waiting area, he knew that J.D. was trying to shove aside his exhaustion and shame. Tami had told Eric that the boy hadn't received any visitors yet, and he wondered if bringing such a pack with him was too much too soon. He found Julie chatting with the redheaded girl in the corner and waved them both over along with Cafferty and Vince.

He waited outside the door so that the room wouldn't be too crowded, and he could see both Julie and the redhead offer J.D. gentle hugs while the boys stood by awkwardly, offering smiles and trying not to stare at the black mark on their teammate's face. Vince looked particularly tongue-tied and seemed eager to get out of the room. After a few minutes, the boys filed out and Julie tailed behind them, coming to stand by her father while the redhead lingered inside. "Where's your friend?" he asked.

"That's Madison," Julie explained, hugging herself. "They sort of dated last year until his dad made them break up. But now his dad's not here..." She flicked her bangs out of her eyes and stared ahead.

"I see."

"I hope he dies, Dad. Is that so terrible for me to think?"

Eric tried to look her in the eye but she was staring ahead, shaking her head.

"I hope he dies."

"Hey." He rested a hand on her back then pulled her into a hug. "It's all right."

She pivoted so that she could hug him with both arms and pressed her face against his chest. It took Eric a moment to realize she was crying. "If he could do that to his own kid, what could he do to you? I know he hates you and I'm scared, Dad."

"Hey, don't even think like that, all right?"

"But it's true, you know it's true," she said, pulling away to look up at him. "You think I don't hear you and mom talking about him and –"

"The man is an asshole, all right, don't get me wrong. But he would never do anything to harm any of us, all right?"

"How can you know that? Look what he's already done."

"I know... but men like that hurt their children because they're cowards. They feel like they're not good enough so they pick on the people weaker than them, I guess. It ain't got nothing to do with us or how much he wants my job or anything, all right? He's smarter than that so don't even worry about it."

She sniffled as she pulled away, wiping at her eyes. "I feel so bad for J.D."

"Yeah," Eric sighed. "Me too." He rested a hand on her shoulder, silently asking with his gaze if she were all right and she nodded.

A moment later, Madison slipped out. She offered the two a strained smile that Julie saw right through before tugging the other girl into a hug.

* * *

Tami tried to force herself to focus as she examined the steaks on sale at the grocery store. Eric could eat a whole one on his own, but she and Julie could split one with some to spare, so was it really worth buying two? Realizing that she'd been staring at the value pack for over a minute, she stuck it in her basket and moved on, heading for the fresh fruit and vegetables. She was looking forward to coming home and curling up with a glass of wine while Eric barbecued. She wanted to forget the stress of the day and her anger towards the McCoys, but she couldn't shake her desire to find a way to ensure that J.D. would be safe and watched over. Of course, she knew he was safe at the hospital, but he was alone in an impersonal space where his body was treated and his emotions and sense of worth were left to atrophy.

After buying some zucchinis to sauté and a box of macaroni, Tami headed home. Julie practically shoved Gracie into her arms as soon as she walked into the door then shouted something about going out with Matt in five minutes. Tami kissed her youngest daughter and sat down on the couch, realizing that she should've just bought one steak after all. Julie left the house in a blur of rattling keys, promises to be back by ten and a flash of blond hair before Eric entered from the backyard, holding a beer.

"You better not be getting any ideas," he said to Gracie with a quirked brow as Julie slammed the front door shut and didn't bother to answer their goodbyes. Gracie merely sucked on her lip and stared up at him with big eyes, making him smile. He crossed the room to the couch and smooched Tami before sitting down beside her. "How was work?"

"Fine. Just... you know. The usual." She sighed and let Gracie down to color at the coffee table.

"I brought the team by to visit J.D. after practice today."

She shook her hair out of her eyes as she looked to him. "How'd that go?"

He shrugged, pursing his lips as his brown eyes fixated on the opposite wall. He was quiet for several long breaths. "I had them visit three or four at a time since there wasn't much room."

"I'm sure he liked that."

Eric shook his head slowly. "He ain't gonna be able to play again. Not this season." He took a swig from his bottle.

Tami sighed and shifted to rest her head on his shoulder. "Don't remind him of that."

"I didn't. But I guess it didn't set in for me until I saw him."

The clock on the wall ticked away and Gracie scribbled with her crayons. The two sounds were the only noises for several long seconds. "I bought us steak for dinner," Tami finally said.

"How could anyone do that to another human being?" Eric burst out.

"I don't know."

"The poor kid couldn't even smile properly because half his face is busted and all swelled up."

"I know. It was like that when I saw him earlier."

Eric shifted to look at her. "How was he? He seemed... I dunno... jumpy."

She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Heartbroken. He was heartbroken. I talked to Katie today and she's not coming because she feels guilty or some excuse like that. She's not talking to the police, either."

"That's ridiculous."

"She's just leaving him there. I spoke with two detectives and they said that if she doesn't return their calls soon, they'll take her in for questioning."

Eric let out a noncommittal grunt then took another sip of beer. "She ought to be put in prison for negligence."

"That poor boy." Tami shook her head. "When I told him that his mom wasn't coming he just... broke. He told me that he should've died if his parents didn't want him. I can't even imagine how hard this must be. I mean, if it's this hard for me..." She sighed again.

"I know it ain't any of our business, but I feel like there's gotta be something more we can do."

"I know, and I've thought about it, hun, but there isn't. I mean, if Joe's not allowed near him and Katie is found unfit to parent, he's gonna either be sent to live with relatives or become a ward of the state."

"Or go to a foster home," Eric said, and something in his voice made Tami straighten and look him in the eye. He met her gaze, looking tired but self-assured.

"Honey, if you're talking about us, it's not possible. There's a whole process you gotta go through to become certified as a foster family, and –"

"Then let's get started on the red tape."

Tami blinked, her lips parted and her brow furrowed. "Babe, are you serious?"

"It'd only be temporary. He's lived here before and it was fine. And it's a hell of a lot better than leaving the hospital to go live with strangers or a group home."

Tami sighed and rubbed her face. "I don't know. We need to talk to Julie."

"It was her idea."

"What?" She let her hands fall away.

"She came by the hospital when I was there with the team. She was pretty upset."

"Wow," Tami stared ahead, impressed by her daughter's generosity. "And you would really be okay with that?"

He shrugged. "It would only be until his mom got her act together."

"Which would probably be for longer than a weekend."

"Look, I've got a feeling that the moment we called CPS, things got a lot tougher in that house. His parents are getting a divorce and Julie said his dad threatened his girlfriend's dad and made them break up or something."

Tami blinked. "You're kidding."

"No, I'm not. That man is a regular Machiavelli. And I can't shake the feeling that we had a hand in making J.D.'s life a whole lot worse so I'd like the chance to make it right."

Tami smiled, her eyes tracing the lines of his face.

Eric furrowed his brow slightly. "What?"

She shook her head, her smile broadening. "I'm just remembering why I married you."

"Yeah, and why's that?" he asked, a coy smile forming on his lips.

"Your big ole heart." She leaned over and kissed him, and he wrapped an arm around her waist as he kissed her back.

**PLEASE LEAVE COMMENTS/REVIEWS. :) Thanks!**


	6. Negotiating

**BROKEN WINGS**

**CHAPTER 6: NEGOTIATING**

J.D. had dozed off after the excitement of so many visitors in one afternoon. When he realized that it was Friday, he felt very small, for he knew that today was the last day of practice before the Homecoming game and that instead of spending every minute on the field, Coach Taylor had ended practice early so that they could visit with their teammate. He knew what a sacrifice the lost time was to the coach and team and as much as it made him feel special, it made him feel sad, as well. He didn't feel like he deserved any special attention, and if the Panthers lost tomorrow, he'd feel awful.

His good hand was resting on the mattress beside his face and he watched it as he curled in his fingers. Madison had been holding it not that long ago. As happy as he was to see her familiar face, he was ashamed that she had to see him so weak and ugly. She wasn't his girlfriend anymore but they'd tried to stay in touch and remain friends after they were forced to break up, and he had always enjoyed her company. She was quick to laugh, generous, and quirky, on top of being smart and pretty. But something changed in her that afternoon.

She had looked at him with something strange and strained in her eyes, and when they were alone, the expression had become more intense. It had made him uncomfortable enough to mumble a joke about how the side of his face must look like an eggplant, but instead of laughing, she had leaned over and gently kissed his bruised cheek. When she pulled away, her eyes were open and kind and almost looked like someone else's, and he realized that it was because he'd just glimpsed the woman Madison and not the girl.

The strength he saw in her gaze made him feel important and lucky to know her, but it made him frightened, too. She was so confident and fiery and shone with an inner light that he didn't think he could ever match. What happened when she realized how ugly and weak and hollow he was? What happened when she couldn't look at him anymore because he couldn't hold up his mask?

A rectangle of light appeared on the wall across from him as a nurse stepped in with a tray of food. He closed his eyes and pretended he was asleep, knowing that if he did, she wouldn't ask him why he didn't eat a bite of his previous meal and wouldn't have the chance to try to tempt him with the new one. She set the plastic tray down as quietly as she could then paused and he could hear the roll of a pen on paper as she recorded something before slipping out with the cold food. He waited until he heard the door shut before opening his eyes.

He thought he could smell mashed potatoes and green beans on the tray, but the scent made him as sick as it did hungry. He'd tried to eat a little bit of bread the day before and it had made his stomach hurt so bad that he never wanted to eat again. Of course he knew he had to eat but he couldn't bring himself to willingly go through that pain. He was convinced the surgeon had accidentally stitched his stomach shut when he or she was patching him up inside.

Letting out a quiet sigh, he wondered what his mother was doing and if she missed him, then stopped himself. He had spent too much time that day wondering about his mother and what could be so awful about him to keep her away, and every time he wanted to cry. So instead, he redirected his thoughts to Tami Taylor and wondered what she was doing. It was about eight at night, so her family had probably already eaten dinner. Maybe they were even getting ready for bed or finishing up their chores for the day. Maybe Tami would come to see him tomorrow afternoon. Maybe his mom would come home. Maybe Tami would visit...

He drifted off to sleep with little resistance, for he was hungry and tired and weak and the effort of thought was becoming harder and harder for him to maintain. He just wanted to fade away into his pillows. Everything else was too much, and he just wanted to disappear.

* * *

Tami walked down the hospital hallway towards J.D.'s room, carrying a gift basket from the admin staff at Dillon High. Someone was yelling and the sound was so desperate that she felt her guts grate at the noise. Quickening her step, she realized the screams were coming from J.D.'s room. Several nurses stood outside the door, looking worried, and Tami glanced at them as she neared the entrance and peered in.

J.D. had his good arm out, trying to ward off a doctor and a nurse with a nasty looking tube and apparatus similar to an IV. "You'll be sedated," the doctor was explaining, though his voice was strained as if he was trying to keep his patience. "So you won't feel a thing."

"What is going on?" Tami asked, taking a step into the room and setting down the basket.

J.D. immediately sat up straighter when he saw her. "Tami! They're trying torture me –"

"No one is torturing you, J.D.," the doctor said before turning to Tami. "Are you his mother?"

"No, I'm his – I'm a family friend."

"I'm going to have to ask you to step outside."

"Don't go," J.D. shouted, and the desperation in his voice made Tami want to step between him and the doctor.

One of the nurses was readying a syringe.

"Hold on now, just a minute," Tami said, raising her voice. "I'm not going anywhere until I know what the hell is going on."

The nurse stepped towards J.D. to adjust something on the apparatus and the boy screamed at her to get away. Tami had never seen him in such wild panic.

"When a patient refuses to eat we speed up the healing process by –"

"Y'all are trying to force feed him?" Tami interrupted, then straightened. "I don't think so."

"It's not force feeding, Ma'am. It's a medical procedure common for patients who have sustained injuries to the walls of their stomachs like J.D. has. We insert a tube through the nose all the way into the large intestine, bypassing the problem area while it heals."

Tami blinked. "You _what_?"

"Get away!" J.D. yelled when the nurse pivoted to face him. He held his elbow out in front of him, as if expecting her to attack. The nurse looked to the doctor, who nodded, so she pulled out her syringe and emptied the contents into the IV bag. "Stop!"

"Hey, can't you see that now isn't the best time?" Tami asked.

"We're on a schedule here and –"

"I don't care about your damn schedule, this is someone's life."

"Hey!" the nurse shouted, drawing Tami and the doctor's attention but it was too late. Blood was slithering down J.D.'s arm where he had yanked out his IV in an attempt to keep the sedative from affecting him. Yet judging by how he was swaying, some had already entered his bloodstream. Tami held a hand to her mouth and stepped out of the way as the doctor pushed past her.

"Damnit," the doctor muttered then yanked open a drawer and grabbed a handful of gauze before pressing it against the wound.

J.D. grabbed the doctor's wrist and tried to shove his hand away but the nurse pressed on his shoulders and forced him to lie down. J.D. complied and looked as if he couldn't resist any more if he wanted to, but was glaring at the doctor and nurse with all of his remaining strength. "Get away from me, you bastard," he said to the doctor through clenched teeth.

"Here," Tami stepped forward. "I'll hold it. Y'all just take a minute, all right?"

The doctor held up his hands, clearly on the verge of losing his temper, and walked out of the room with the nurse, lecturing her about how from now on, gavage patients were to be sedated before he was even in the room.

Once they were alone, Tami lifted the gauze enough to peer at the hole in the boy's arm, glad that the bleeding was slowing. She replaced the gauze and continued to press against the hole as she searched J.D.'s expression. He looked a little loopy from the sedative that had gotten into his system, but he was fighting hard against it to remain lucid. "Can we leave?" he whispered.

She shook her head. "Not until they say you're well enough, hun. Why'd you have to go and make a mess of your arm?"

"Yes, we can. You have a car, right? Let's just walk out right now. I feel fine."

Tami sighed and glared at the door where she could see the doctor talking to the nurse outside. "I don't blame you for wanting to leave, J.D., but I really don't think that's a good idea. If you can't even eat on your own –"

"I can eat. I'll eat anything you want me to. Just not here."

She looked back to him and noticed that the bruise on his face had lessened enough for his left eye to open a little, though she doubted he could see much through the slit. "If they think you need to be fed through a tube, they have a good reason –"

"No they don't," he said, his voice beginning to shake. "It's my fault. I tried to eat yesterday and it hurt really bad but I don't care. I'd rather go through that then have them stick a tube into my stomach."

"You don't have a choice, J.D. If your stomach needs time to heal, then –"

"I'll be fine. Just can't we go? Please?"

Tami parted her lips, wishing she could give him the answer that he wanted. Instead, she checked on his wound again. The gauze was nearly soaked through with blood but the hole itself was drying up. The nurse came back in and Tami could feel J.D. tense at the slight woman's presence. She grabbed a sterile bandage and silently swapped places with Tami so that she could tape it to J.D.'s arm. "Thank you," Tami said as she threw away the extra tape. "Hey, is there any estimate on when he can go home?"

The nurse shook her head. "I don't know that, Ma'am, but I can ask the Dr. Ryan for you."

"That'd be great."

The nurse nodded and slipped out.

J.D. inspected his bandage with a pouting expression that suddenly brightened when a thought came to him. "Hey, they can't give me another IV. This arm's all cut up and the other one is in a bandage." He cautiously lifted his broken arm. "There's no reason for me to stay here."

Tami folded her arms over her chest. "Where're you gonna go?"

"What?"

"You're so anxious to go home but where are you gonna go? You can't go stay with your dad. Have you heard from your mom yet?"

The hopeful look faded from his face as he shook his head no.

"Do y'all have any relatives around here? Relatives you might like to stay with?"

He was quiet for several long breaths and for a moment, she was worried the sedative had made him fall asleep. "Only my grandma," he said hoarsely. "But she lives in New York."

"That's where your mom is."

J.D. nodded. "I've never met her."

Tami raised her brows. "You've never met your own grandmother?"

"Well, I have but it was when I was really little. I can't remember what she looks like."

Tami just stared for a few moments. "How could you have never met your grandma? What do y'all do for Thanksgiving? Christmas?"

"I think she got mad at my mom," he said quietly. "And my mom got mad at her. Grandma didn't like my dad and they would always fight so she just figured it was easier if she stayed away, I guess."

Tami shook her head. "But what about you? She never visits her grandson?"

"She's sent me birthday cards and stuff. But my cousins live up there so she has other grandkids nearby."

Tami sighed and rubbed her face. "Okay, look. Here's what we're gonna do. Eric and I have been talking and we're gonna apply to become foster parents. So when you get released from the hospital, if your mom still ain't ready to take care of you again, you're more than welcome in our home, all right? It'll probably just be for a little while, but it's better than going to live with strangers or –"

"Can we go right now?"

Tami slowly smiled. She had expected him to have resistance to the idea, even if only for the sake of denying that his mother was having problems. She hadn't expected him to be so comfortable with living with his coach and his wife. Then again, there was a slightly manic light in his good eye, and she figured he'd say or do anything at the moment to try to get out of the hospital. "Sweetie, you know we can't go right now."

"All I do is lie here all day. I can do that somewhere else."

Tami sighed. "Well, they need to monitor your progress, give you physical therapy, help you with your pain medicine, all that stuff."

"I can take care of all that."

Tami studied him, her eyes sad. He had the look of a child trying to barter to go to a slumber party. "We'll see what the doctor says, all right?"

"Not that doctor. That doctor hates me."

"He doesn't hate you, J.D."

"I hate him."

"Well, regardless, we have to trust his opinion."

J.D. glared at the door. "I wouldn't trust his poo."

"Come on, now."

"Sorry."

The nurse stepped back in and ignored J.D., making direct eye-contact with Tami instead. "Dr. Ryan estimates it will be about a week. Maybe a little less. But the physical therapy sessions will continue for a few months."

"A _week_?" J.D. asked, earning him a quick glance from the nurse.

"Well, in situations like these," she began delicately. "We try to accommodate for the patient as long as possible so that when they're released, they're self-sufficient."

"Situations like these?" Tami repeated. "You mean because he has no home to go home to right now."

The nurse hesitated before nodding. "It's best if the child is in a controlled environment for as long as possible while they heal before dealing with the stress of a new living situation."

J.D. narrowed his good eye. "What child?"

"You, hun." Tami quipped then continued before he could deny his legal status. "What if he already has a place set up for him to go home to? We can help out and take him to physical therapy every day."

"Um, we can't really discuss anything like that until you or whoever has been certified."

"All right, fair enough. Thank you."

The nurse nodded and stepped back outside.

Tami looked back to J.D., who looked like he was facing his executioner. "A week isn't that long," she said quietly.

"Yeah, it is," he whispered.

"As soon as I get home, I'm gonna make some phone calls, all right? I looked into it last night and there're a few classes I need to take and our home has to be inspected, but that's it. We can get the ball rolling and maybe, by this time next week, you can come on home with us."

The expression he had fixed her with was as skeptical as it was hopeful until something shifted in his eyes and he looked panicked again. He grabbed the phone on his bedside and started dialing.

"What're you doing?"

He didn't answer, but in a moment, she heard the voice of Katie McCoy on her voicemail, prompting the caller to leave a message. "Mom, it's J.D. Will you please answer? Will you at least call me back? I've been stuck here this whole time and they won't let me go because you're not here to take care of me." His voice cracked and he frowned, taking a breath to try to check his emotions but he soon realized the task was futile and gave up. Defeat crept into his tone. "I hate you." He hung up and tossed the phone aside.

Tami rested her fingertips against her temple. "I hope you don't really hate her, J.D."

"I do."

"You can be mad as hell at her, but you shouldn't hate her."

"You're not the one stuck here because of her," he snapped. "People trying to shove tubes down my nose. Everything hurts and all these strangers keep coming in and poking at me and I just want to be left alone. I hate it here. I hate it! And it's all her fault!"

Tami nodded, knowing that more than anything, he wanted to be heard and he wanted to know that someone agreed with him. And it was a pleasant change to see him so animated, even if it was from adrenaline.

"She never stood up to him. She never should've married him. She's just stupid and mean and... and..." His lip trembled as he lost his steam. "And no wonder she hates me so much because I hate her."

"She doesn't hate you, J.D."

"Then why isn't she here?"

Tami stepped towards him. "I know this is killing you inside but you've got to try to understand that it's her problem and not yours. There is nothing you could've ever done to deserve this, hun. Nothing."

He screwed his eyes shut and leaned his head back, taking a few steadying breaths. "I want to go home," he whispered. "But home doesn't exist anymore."

"It will, sweetheart. It will someday soon. It'll just be a little different."

"Have you tried calling her?" he asked, opening his eyes.

Tami sighed and realized she should've known better than to expect him to accept his mother's failings so easily. Especially when he saw Katie as a way out. "Okay, J.D. – first things first. Can you eat or can't you?"

He nodded. "I don't want that tube down my throat. That's what they did to torture people in Guantanamo Bay."

She furrowed her brow. "Really?"

"Yeah, when they went on hunger strikes."

"I didn't know that. But anyway, if you promise to eat something, I will tell this Dr. Ryan and maybe he'll hold off on the feeding tube thing. All right?"

J.D. nodded.

"Okay. Perfect." She bustled to the door and found Dr. Ryan down the hallway, on the phone. He held up a finger to her, gesturing that he'd be with her in a minute, so she nodded and stuck her head back into the teen's room. "He's on the phone," she mouthed to J.D., making him furrow his brow as he tried to decipher what she'd mouthed to him.

"What bone?" he whispered back but Tami had to ignore him as Dr. Ryan hung up and strolled over.

Stepping outside, Tami offered him her best fake smile. "Hey, sorry to bother y'all."

"It's no bother," Dr. Ryan said, though his expression and tone suggested otherwise. Tami was tempted to ask him if he was an asshole by nature or if he practiced.

"Okay, so the deal is, J.D. will do his best to eat if you hold off on the feeding tube. Is that possible with his condition?"

The doctor shrugged. "Sure. But if there are complications, we'll do what we need to do, of course."

"Excellent. Thank you so much for being understanding." She tried not to narrow her eyes too much as she noticed just how red and puffy the man's nose was. "Okay. If y'all could get some applesauce in here or something, that would be great."

Dr. Ryan nodded and shuffled off.

Tami furrowed her brow then went back inside with J.D. "Well, he agreed to it but he sure isn't pleasant."

J.D. sighed.

"Son, did you hit him in the nose, by any chance?"

J.D. slowly smiled.

**PLEASE REVIEW. :) I've been trying to incorporate readers' suggestions into the story, so don't be shy to speak up!**


	7. Awkward

**BROKEN WINGS**

**CHAPTER 7: AWKWARD**

"What do you mean he punched the doctor in the nose?" Eric asked as he set the table.

Tami shrugged as she chopped carrots. "I mean the man got too close and he punched him. I don't blame him. They were trying to stick a tube all the way down his nose and into his intestine."

Eric paused in what he was doing and stared at her. "Are you serious?"

"Yeah, I'm serious."

Eric furrowed his brow. "That must be a long tube. How do they aim that thing?"

"I don't know, hun, but I got J.D. to promise to try to eat something in exchange for them holding off on torturing him."

"Wow."

"Yeah. Wow."

Eric resumed setting the table. "Well, if he's well enough to be punching people, why can't he leave the hospital?"

Tami sighed and scraped the carrots off the cutting board and into a glass dish. "I don't know. They need to keep an eye on him and all. But he did eat a whole cup of applesauce so maybe that will change their minds." She added some water to the carrots, stuck the lid on, then placed the dish in the microwave and set it for a few minutes.

Eric shook his head. "This whole situation is just ridiculous."

"Don't tell J.D., but I tried to call his mom again after I left the hospital. She must have her phone off and it said her inbox was full so I couldn't leave a message. I think I'm gonna call the police and see if they'll tell me anything. I'm getting worried about her."

"Honey, that woman ain't worth wasting worry on."

"Even just for his sake. He deserves to know what's going on with her." She folded her arms over her chest while she waited for the carrots to cook.

"While I remember," Eric said. "Joyce from TARA or something like that left a message today."

Tami tucked her hair behind her ear as she headed for the answering machine. "TARE? That's the Texas Adoption Resource Exchange."

"I knew that."

Tami pressed play and listened to the message. Eric locked her gaze as the woman on the machine spoke, sounding bubbly as she informed them that there was an informational meeting that weekend that they were welcome to attend and that she would be faxing the forms she needed to fill out to her office the next morning.

Eric blinked. "How the hell are they so on top of things?"

"My word, I thought this was gonna be like the DMV."

Eric smirked. "Honey, kids are different than cars."

"Yeah, but with all the red tape..."

"Don't look a gift horse in the mouth," he said as he passed by, stopping to smooch her.

"Yeah?" She caught his belt loop and yanked him over for another kiss. He chuckled as he kissed her back, but just then Julie walked in.

"Hey Mom, can I –" She held up a hand to block her vision and cringed. "Never mind. I'll ask later." She all but ran down the hall. Tami laughed.

* * *

The next morning, Tami stopped by the hospital on her way to the Homecoming game. J.D. had somehow managed to negotiate to get a TV in his room and had it on the local station that was broadcasting the game. She smiled as she entered. "Look at you. You're all set up."

"If I yell, they said they'd take it away from me."

"I do think an old man is in the room next to yours. You might give him a heart attack."

J.D. smiled a little.

"Have you eaten anything today?"

He nodded. "Jell-o."

"That's good. Did it hurt your stomach."

"Yeah."

"Did you tell them that?"

"No way."

She sighed. "All right. Just be careful. I'll stop by again after the game, all right?"

He nodded. "Okay. Thank you."

"You're welcome, hun. Have fun."

He offered her another small smile as she slipped out. Something was tickling her side and she realized it was the phone in her purse. Pulling it out, she saw a number she didn't recognize and answered as she walked down the hall.

"Hello?"

"Mrs. Taylor, this is Detective Hertzer returning your call from last night."

"Oh, hi Detective."

"So you're applying to be a foster parent for J.D.?"

"Yeah, I'm taking my first class tomorrow." She stepped into the elevator and pressed the button for the ground floor.

"Excellent. It's always good when situations like this work out in the best interest of the child."

"Well what's up with his mom? Can you tell me anything about what's going on with Katie?"

"We've been in touch with NYPD and they checked her into the psychiatric ward the other day."

Tami's lips parted in shock. "They what?"

"It's standard procedure, even though it sounds dramatic. Apparently she had a nervous breakdown and was threatening to harm herself, so she's been deemed incapable of caring for her child for the time being."

"Oh my God, that poor woman..." The elevator doors opened and she stepped out and headed through the lobby.

"We'll be sure to notify you if there's any change. In the meantime, I've put priority on your application to get that processed as soon as possible. If you're attending the information meeting on Sunday, then I'll go ahead and schedule an in-home inspection for sometime this week, if that's all right with you?"

"Sure, that'd be great. I mean, any way that we can help out and speed up the process."

"Perfect."

She could hear him writing something down and squinted in the sunlight as she headed out to her car. "Any word on Joe McCoy?"

She thought she could hear Detective Hertzer sigh. "He took a polygraph test and passed with flying colors. That's not enough for CPS to drop their charges against him, but unless J.D. remembers what happened, his lawyers have a strong case to prove his innocence."

Tami furrowed her brow as she hunted for her keys in her purse. "Well, why can't they just wait to make a decision until J.D. is willing to make a statement?"

"Mr. McCoy is threatening to sue for being kept away from his son. He's attempting to prove to CPS that he's capable of taking care of J.D. once he's released from the hospital. CPS is more than willing to grant him that so long as he is innocent."

Tami unlocked her car and sat inside. "But you don't think he is."

"Polygraph tests are far from accurate. My partner and I are going to stop by to visit J.D. again on Monday. In the meantime, you could try to find out what he remembers and prepare him to make a statement."

Tami nodded, running a hand through her dirty blonde hair. "All right. I'll try but he swears he doesn't remember a thing."

"You're someone he trusts, Mrs. Taylor. He'd be more likely to talk to you than to my partner or me. Victims of domestic violence often don't want to talk to law enforcement in an attempt to protect their abuser. It's a vicious cycle."

"All right. I'll see what I can do."

"Thank you for your cooperation, Mrs. Taylor."

"You're welcome."

Detective Hertzer hung up and Tami followed suit before sighing, staring at the water residue on the windshield. The man was right, J.D. did trust her, but digging at an open wound, prying to try to make him remember could break that trust. He had made it clear that he didn't like or trust the detectives, and that he didn't know what to think about his dad. Starting the engine, she knew she'd be spending most of the game trying to think of how to tactfully bring the subject up when next she saw him.

As it turned out, the Homecoming game was so exciting that she didn't have much time to think about anything other than where the ball was. The Panthers were down three points from the start and it wasn't until the last few minutes that they had managed to regain some momentum and tie with the other team. Buddy Garrity was in the stands near her and the man started whooping and screaming when the Panthers scored another two points in the final minutes. She tried not to wince from his cries, and when she cast an amused look to Julie who was nearby with Matt, she caught a glimpse of none other than Joe McCoy watching her from the other side of the stands.

The amused expression faded from Tami's face as she felt a sliver of apprehension shiver up her spine. His expression was smug and arrogant as he locked her gaze then looked back out at the field, clapping, and Tami was struck with a chord of fear. All through the past week, she hadn't once paused to think how Joe would react if he knew she had been visiting his son when he couldn't. Once he found out that she could possibly be J.D.'s foster parent...

Joe McCoy wasn't a monster, at least not to social acquaintances who could do something for him. But if he really had nearly killed his own son, then he was worse than a monster. He was a lying, manipulating, abusive son of a gun. The idea that he could flip a switch and be pleasant to outsiders then turn around and be so horrible at home gave her the chills. Even if he hadn't attacked J.D., he had emotionally abused him for years, and the kid was reaching the age where he either had to break away and experience life on his own terms, or give in and forever be a prisoner of his father's doctrine.

Tami kept her eyes on Eric as the Panthers celebrated their win, then stole another glance at Joe. She felt a little sick to her stomach when she realized that she'd seen J.D. make the same expression Joe was making right now. He had his father's mouth. But the rest of his face didn't bear much resemblance to the older man. J.D. had yet to grow into his features and might look more like his father in time, but for the moment at least, he looked much more like his mother. Or rather, he looked much more like himself, which suited Tami just fine, for she hated the glimpses she saw of Joe in the boy's face.

"Mom. Mom?"

Tami looked away from Joe and found Julie looking at her with an amused expression. "Can we go?"

"Oh, yeah, sure, hun," Tami said, shaking her bangs out of her eyes as she stood up and grabbed her purse, making her way down the bleachers. Julie and Matt followed her and in a few minutes, they were waiting outside the locker room. The players began to exit and chat and receive congratulations from the waiting spectators. Tami tried not to make it obvious but glanced about for Joe McCoy, just in case. The tall man was nowhere to be seen, and she was startled when Eric touched her elbow, snapping her out of her manhunt. Maybe she had been obvious, after all.

"Hey, you okay?" he asked quietly.

She turned to him with a smile and hugged him. "Congratulations."

"Thank you. Everything all right?"

"Everything's fine, hun." She smooched him. "That was some game, huh?"

He chuckled.

* * *

When Tami returned to the hospital that afternoon, she went into the bathroom and closed herself in a stall. She did have to pee, but she also needed a moment to take a few steadying breaths to steel herself for what she was about to do. The last thing she wanted right now was to break J.D.'s trust in any way, and she was worried that by prying into his memories, she'd make him associate her with fear. She knew he already saw her as the bearer of bad news given what she had shared about his mother, but she wanted to try to change that. Once she exited the bathroom, she straightened her skirt and blouse and knocked on his door. She could hear him call for her to come in so she entered with a smile.

"Hey, how about those last five minutes, huh?" she asked as she stepped in.

J.D. looked as if he'd been pouting and didn't crack a smile. "I fell asleep at halftime. I missed the end."

"You're joking."

He shook his head mournfully.

Tami set down her purse and coat and took a seat in the chair. "They scored two points in the last few minutes and won."

"The Panthers?"

She nodded.

"Ugh," he leaned back against his pillows. "I wish I could've seen it."

"Well, you might've been cheering and woken up that old man."

"Yeah, and they might've kicked me out of the hospital and I'd be free."

Tami smiled a little. "How're you feeling?"

He shrugged and didn't meet her gaze, but he could see his reflection in the black TV screen and knew he looked pretty ragged. "How're you?"

Tami furrowed her brow a little. "I'm fine, thanks. How come?"

"You always ask me how I'm doing."

She smiled. "That's sweet, hun, but I'm not the one who just had major surgery."

He sighed and his eyes looked somewhat sad as he studied her face. His vulnerable expression wasn't making the task at hand any easier and she bit the inside of her lower lip.

J.D. furrowed his brow at the change in her demeanor. "What?"

"Sweetie, I need to ask you something."

"Okay."

"You have to promise to tell me the truth, all right?"

He nodded, his eyes now roving her face and she knew he was trying to anticipate what she was about to say.

"What do you remember about the night you were attacked?"

He immediately broke eye contact with her and looked at the wall across from him.

Tami sighed. "I know it's not something you want to think about, hun, but it has been long enough now that the detectives are gonna start bothering you again. If you're willing to tell me, I'll tell them so that you don't have to talk to them any more than to make a statement."

"How many times do I have to say that I don't remember?"

"Do you really not remember or do you just not want me to know the truth?"

He looked at her again and swallowed, and when he spoke his voice sounded hurt. "I would tell you if I remembered. You think I'm lying to you?"

She raised her brows. "No. But I know you're scared all the time. Being scared like that can make little things seem big."

"I'm _not_ lying to you. I don't remember what happened."

She sighed and rubbed her face. "All right. I'm sorry."

His brows twitched as he watched her. "But there is one thing..."

"I'm listening."

"Well... I've remembered it for a while, but I never really understood that it was a memory from the same night."

Tami nodded. "I'm sure it's awful confusing."

He chewed on a corner of his lip, his eyes growing distant in thought before he spoke again. "Since my mom wasn't home, I went out to eat dinner after practice. I met Luke and a couple other guys at Denny's. My dad sucks at cooking... I left early because I have to be home by eight on school nights. And I had to park a few blocks away... so as I was walking back to my truck, I remember seeing white T-shirts on the other side of the road."

He looked to Tami.

"You know how white always stands out in the dark?"

She nodded, listening intently.

"I could hear them talking and realized they were speaking Spanglish, so I started walking faster because of what happened to last month to that kid."

"That was smart of you," Tami said, recalling all too well how a local fourteen-year-old boy had been walking home when he was stabbed to death by gang members because he dared to shout back to their taunts. In some parts of town, being young, white, and male after dark were crime enough Mexican gangs, so Tami couldn't blame J.D.'s parents for wanting him home by eight.

"They started shouting things at me but I just kept going and pretended I didn't hear them. Then traffic slowed and they started running across the street so I ran to my truck and got in before they made it there. I drove away and they were laughing. I remember coming home and telling my dad. He wanted to call the police but I told him not to. I didn't get a good look at any of them."

Tami nodded. "That's must've been scary."

He shrugged. "Yeah... "

She remembered Joe's statement about J.D. being attacked by a gang, and her guts twisted at the idea that he might have been right. "Do you think there's any chance they followed you home?"

"Not unless they knew where I lived. They were on foot."

"You're certain this was the same night you were hurt?"

He nodded, his voice soft. "And I remember the stars."

Tami furrowed her bow. "What do you mean?"  
"I remember feeling very cold and watching my breath make smaller and smaller clouds until it didn't make any clouds at all. And I could see so many stars..." He smiled wistfully. "I used to have stars on my ceiling. Little glow in the dark ones. I used to love space."

Tami smiled. "What changed?"

He shook his head and the wistful expression faded. "I found out I was good at football, I guess."

"Just because you're good at one thing doesn't mean you should give up on the others."

He was quiet for several breaths. "When you put so much time and energy into something, you don't exactly have a lot of room left for anything else."

"Yeah, I suppose you're right," she said, realizing that football had dictated his existence for the past few years whether he wanted it to or not.

He sighed and looked at her tiredly. "That's all I remember. Except for... for pain, and feeling like I couldn't breathe, and drifting up into the stars..."

"As awful as I'm sure it was, you make it sound beautiful. You've got a unique way of looking at things."

His eyes didn't quite meet hers. "Oh..."

Tami realized he had no idea how to take a compliment. That was something they'd have to work on. "Don't you worry about trying to remember anything else, hun. I don't want you to feel pressured at all. That'll only make it worse."

He nodded. "But Tami, I –" He cut himself off at a quiet knock at the door. Madison entered, holding a stuffed panda bear. She looked surprised to see Tami and shifted her smile to greet both of them. "Hi."

"Hi, Maddy."

Tami tried not to stare. The delighted, awkward smiles they were giving each other were adorable. So was the way Madison seemed afraid to get any closer than a few feet within the door. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt anything," the girl began. "I could come back later."

"No, it's fine," J.D. said.

Tami stood up and grabbed her purse. "I was just on my way out, actually."

"You can stay," J.D. said, and Tami wondered if he honestly wanted to visit longer, was trying to be polite, or if he wanted her around as a buffer to deflect some of the nervousness that had suddenly entered the room. Julie had filled her in on the fact that the two had dated a year ago before they were forced to break up, but that they had remained friends. Yet the way they both looked ready to get red in the face at the drop of a hat told Tami that something more significant than friendship was blooming. And things would only get more awkward if she stuck around.

"I'll see you tomorrow, all right, hun?" she asked as she tugged on her coat.

J.D. nodded. "Yeah, sure. Tell the coach congratulations for me."

Tami nodded with a smile. "I sure will." She glanced to Madison as she shouldered her purse. "Did you catch the game?"

The girl's eyes got a little wider upon being addressed, and Tami remembered how she had lingered in the threshold of her office, afraid to come in. She had forgotten that as principal, she was all but horrifying to some students. "Oh, no, actually, I'm not that much of a football fan, but I'm learning."

Tami winked at her as she walked past. "We level-headed women must adapt to our surroundings to survive."

Madison gave her a full smile at the joke, her brown eyes crinkling up, adding warmth to the expression.

Tami glanced to J.D. as she opened the door. "Just give me a call if you need anything, all right?"

He nodded, and she noted how comically stiff he was. "Okay, thank you."

She gave him one last smile then slipped out. She was surprised by her reaction to Madison, for had it been a young woman of a different comport, she might have felt defensive of J.D. But something about Madison felt mature and genuine, goofy, even, and Tami knew she could trust her intentions. She knew there were some girls who would do anything they could to get a football player as their boyfriend to raise their own status, because she'd been one of those girls in high school herself. Thank goodness she had grown up and learned to earn her own respect. But Madison felt different and Tami was happy J.D. had someone else he could talk to about the world outside of football. Someone who didn't seem intent on using him when he was vulnerable.

Once inside her car, Tami couldn't help but laugh over the irony of thinking that she had changed so much since she was a teenager. She had married a football coach, after all.

**Please, please leave reviews! **

**I'm trying to make this as authentic to the world of the show as I can, despite the fact that it's a different plot than the series, and welcome any suggestions for future scenes. Also, from what I remember of Madison in the show, she was pretty cliché, so I've tried to reinvent her as someone more realistic.**


	8. Icy Spiders

**BROKEN WING**

**CHAPTER 8: ICY SPIDERS**

J.D. was dozing when the phone in his room rang, snapping him out of his half dreams inspired by Madison's stories about games she played with her little sister and the ambient noises of the hospital. Reaching out his good arm, he winced as he contorted his torso to grab the phone by his bed. Adrenaline was making his heart race. It was getting late on a Saturday – past the hour when well-wishers would cal – it had to be his mom calling to let him know she was on her way home. He fumbled for a moment, trying to get his stiff thumb to press the answer button. "Hello?"

"Hey sport."

J.D. felt his heart dip at the male voice, but he smiled when he recognized that it was his dad. He hadn't been called "sport" since he was small. "Hi, dad."

"How're you doing?"

"I..." His guts grated as tension pooled in his stomach at his father's question, the familiar voice vibrating in his mind.

_Joe stood several feet from him on the grass, slowly rotating a glass of ice and brandy. The world around them was dark but the lawn was illuminated by the lights from the house. _

J.D. furrowed his brow. "I dunno know. I've been better, I guess."

"I'll bet. How's the staff treating you?"

"Okay."

"Good."

Silence fell on either side of the line and J.D. felt the tension in his stomach begin to form a knot. He felt ill. "Where are you?"

"Back at home."

_J.D. looked down at his hands and saw a scuffed up football. In front of him, yards beyond the crystalline cloud of his breath, was a tire he was throwing the ball through. The tire had been part of his childhood swing until his father had cut it down and set it up as a target for him. His father was behind him and as he burped, J.D. could smell the alcohol on his breath._

"Oh."

The pain in his stomach was growing sharper and making him nauseous, so he pressed his heels against the mattress and tried to shift his position without bending his torso too much. "Listen, son, I spoke with your mother this morning and she's going through a real tough time."

The knots in J.D.'s stomach dissipated into a cold pit as he felt the tempo of his heart rise. His father hadn't spoken to him since he was admitted to the hospital and yet here he was, already making excuses for his mom instead of asking him how he was coping with being away from home, surrounded by strangers all day, doing his best to heal.

"And you know that I'm not allowed to visit you right now, right?"

J.D. nodded, his throat going dry, then reminded himself that his father couldn't see his nod. "Yeah, Tam— they told me," he replied, catching himself before he revealed Tami's involvement.

"It's complete bullshit. Did you tell them that? Have you given the police a description of the gangbangers who attacked you?"

J.D. moved his lips but no words came, and he felt numbness spread its wings in his chest.

"_Fucking Mexicans shouldn't even be allowed in our country," Joe spat as he shook his head. _

"_Don't talk like that," J.D. replied as he aimed and threw the ball._

"_This is my house and I'll talk however the hell I please."_

"J.D.?"

"Yeah... yeah, I... um... I should go."

"What? Why? This is the first time we've spoken all week."

Sweat was breaking out on his hairline. "I know, it's just, there's this old guy next door and it's late. I don't wanna wake him up." Joe didn't reply but J.D. could hear him sigh.

"All right. You don't need to say anything more."

"No, Dad, I just –"

There was a noise on the other end then the hiss of a dead line. Joe had hung up on him. J.D. held perfectly still, listening to the static until it clicked into the dial tone. Licking his lips, he tried to swallow past the dryness of his throat then clicked off the phone. For several long moments, he stared at the dark wall ahead of him, feeling as if a hundred icy spiders were creeping along his flesh, crawling up his back and digging into his brain. His stomach tickled with bile as the confusing sounds and images his father's voice had triggered wove themselves into a picture.

He swallowed hard but knew it wasn't worth it to fight the nausea. He was going to throw up. He grabbed the nearly empty water pitcher from the side of his bed and tried to take a few steadying breaths, then his stomach heaved.

He remembered.

* * *

Tami sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose as she waited in line to get out of the parking lot. The informative meeting had been long but helpful, and her passenger's seat was littered with packets, pamphlets, and handouts on foster parenting. It was three in the afternoon on a Sunday and she had a headache from not eating or drinking enough all day. All she wanted to do was go home and start dinner, but she'd promised J.D. that she'd visit him today. The importance of following through on promises had been discussed at the meeting, reminding her of her training on dealing with on-edge teens.

The line of cars finally began to move and she felt some of her tension release as she was finally headed towards the freeway. The one hour drive back to Dillon seemed too long, so she rummaged through her purse with her free hand, trying to find the protein bar she thought she'd put in there earlier in the week. It was smashed, had melted and cooled a few times, and was in pieces, but it was better than nothing. By the time she reached the hospital, she actually felt human again.

She made her way up to J.D.'s room with only an hour or so left in visiting hours, which hastened her step. Knocking on the door, she waited a minute then stepped in with a smile, only to discover that J.D. wasn't there. Furrowing her brow, she glanced around the room and saw that his cards were still on the windowsill, so he couldn't have changed rooms. Slipping back out to the waiting room, she sat down with her purse on her lap and tried to think past the lingering pain in her skull to figure out where he could be.

A small part of her was panicked, worrying that something had gone wrong and that he'd had to be rushed into surgery, but as she often had to remind herself when panicking over the possibilities of loved ones being in danger, "when you hear hoofbeats, think horses, not zebras." The most common, logical answer was almost always the correct. She'd drilled the philosophy into herself when she had been home alone for the first time with Gracie and kept having horrible fears that Eric had been in a car accident every time he was late for dinner. It was an anxiety she rarely let show but was constantly grappling inside.

The doctors had mentioned physical therapy, so that was probably where J.D. was. He was healing well, so she doubted there were any complications. She tried not to tap her foot as she waited, glancing through a magazine that showcased the allegedly shocking photos of female celebrities and their cellulite. "God forbid they be human," she murmured.

After a few minutes, she spied a nurse pushing J.D. down the hall in a wheelchair. She smiled and rose but neither had seen her yet, and when the nurse paused to open the door to the room, J.D. snuck out of his wheelchair to walk in on his own. The nurse, an intimidating dark skinned man, gave him a disapproving look, but J.D. walked in anyway. His step was a little shuffling and slow but steady enough for someone who seemed afraid to hold his torso completely upright.

"My, my, my," she said as she approached the open door, catching J.D.'s attention as he sat back down on his bed.

"He's damn sneaky, is what he is," the nurse said, shaking his head with a rueful smile before pointing at J.D. "Remember what we talked about."

"Yeah, I know," J.D. said, tugging at his pants as they pinched his thighs, clad in the scrub-like wear of a patient.

The nurse winked at Tami before wheeling the chair back down the hall. Tami entered with a perplexed smile. "Everything okay?"

He nodded. "Yeah. Walter just thinks I'm pushing myself too hard."

"Oh?" She stepped over to him and set down her purse. "With what?"

He shrugged. "I dunno. Everything. I just want to get better, you know," he said with his slight lisp that secretly made Tami's heart glow with maternal affection. "The sooner I can get out of here, the better."

"I went to my first meeting today."

"Yeah? How'd that go?"

"It was... It was good," she said. "A little long, but worthwhile."

He pivoted a little to face her as she walked to the other side of his bed to sit in the tattered armchair that looked like one from the waiting room. "What did they talk about?"

"Legal stuff, psychological stuff. I think it's more geared towards folks who are adopting little kids."

He furrowed his brow. "Adopting? I thought it was just temporary."

"It is, I mean, the meeting covered both, you know."

He nodded, his eyes growing distant. "Oh."

Tami cocked her head to better peer at his expression. One of the first things the instructor had covered was the child's resistance to their new situation and surroundings, but she didn't need a pamphlet to tell her that J.D. was less than sold on the idea of permanently living apart from his parents. In fact, she was surprised he hadn't yet expressed more distress at the idea, given that he was programmed for unwavering loyalty. "Is there something you wanna talk about, hun? Cuz you know you can tell me anything."

For a moment, he didn't seem to hear her, then he sucked on his lower lip for a few seconds before he met her gaze. "Everything's just... happening so fast."

She nodded, resting her elbows on her knees. "It's only been about six days."

"Six? That's all?"

Tami rested her chin on her fist. "We heard about what happened on Wednesday afternoon and I went to see you. You'd already been in the hospital for a night."

He looked as if the act of trying to remember the order of events was causing him physical pain, and after a few moments, he gave up and brought his feet onto the bed. He scooted back so he could lean against the pillows and give his healing abdominal muscles a break.

"You know, that painkiller you've been on is pretty powerful. I know it makes a lot of people get confused."

He nodded absently, and his expression had been so distant over their past few exchanges that she wondered if he was so exhausted from physical therapy that he didn't know what was going on.

"Hun... are you all right?"

His eyes snapped to hers then, fully alert. "Yeah, I just... I, um... last night I threw up."

"Oh no, are you all right?"

"Yeah, but they started talking about using the feeding tube again. But I didn't throw up because I was sick. It was because my dad called."

She studied his profile at length since he refused to look at her. "He upset you that much?"

He nodded, his slightly receding chin making him look terribly unsure, and his voice was so soft that she could hardly understand him. "I guess it was... it... he made me remember."

Tami waited patiently until he hesitatingly met her gaze again. "Sweetie, what do you remember?"

His eyes were stormy like the sea. "Everything."

_**Don't be shy. Please review! :)**_


	9. One With the Night

**Warning:** This chapter contains somewhat graphic violence.

**BROKEN WINGS**

**CHAPTER 9: ONE WITH THE NIGHT**

TUESDAY NIGHT

J.D. came home to find his father watching an old football game, sipping a glass of brandy. "Hey, son. How was practice?"

J.D. shrugged off his backpack and headed to the kitchen to get a drink of water. "It was fine. Something weird happened, though."

"Oh?" Joe paused the game and pivoted on the couch to look at the teen.

"Yeah," J.D. said as he grabbed a glass and filled it at the tap. "You know how some of us went out for dinner?" Joe nodded. "Well, my truck was like, a block away, and when I was walking to it, these guys started mirroring me on the other side of the street." Joe furrowed his brow while J.D. paused to drink a gulp. "Then they started shouting things, like in Spanish and stuff, with real thick accents, so I ignored them. Then I get in my car – no, then they start crossing the street, heading straight towards me, so I got in my truck as fast as I could and left."

Joe continued to stare at him for several more heartbeats. "Were they gangbangers?"

J.D. finished his water. "They looked like it. I wasn't about to wait around to find out."

"Jesus. They could've killed you."

J.D. shrugged then washed his glass. "How was work?"

The older man groaned. "Carter is riding my ass, as usual." Joe got up with a sigh and refilled his glass. "Causing me way more trouble than he's worth."

"Why don't you just talk to him?"

"It would be pointless."

J.D. set his glass aside to drip dry.

"Wanna watch the rest of the game with me?"

"No thanks. I've got a Math test tomorrow. I need to study."

Joe smiled and patted his back as J.D. stepped past him and grabbed his backpack before heading upstairs. J.D. hated Math with a passion and Algebra II was ready to chew him up and spit him out but he knew he had to try. He had a 3.83 and knew that he should be pushing himself harder to try to get back to a 4.0. But the abstract equations and rules of Algebra made about as much sense to him as the myth of a distant, dead culture.

After trying a few practice problems and getting the wrong answer every time, he decided to take a break. He slipped outside and found that his dad was already out on the well-lit lawn, practicing his golf stroke. J.D. couldn't help but smirk and Joe caught the expression on his face. "Don't laugh at your old man. I'm supposed to play on Sunday with Scotty Malone."

J.D. slowly shook his head and took aim at the old tire hanging several yards away. "I didn't say anything." He threw the ball and it hurtled through the center. He thought he could see his dad smiling out of the corner of his eye as he jogged over to retrieve it.

"Don't wear yourself out."

"I won't. I just need a break."

Joe took a sip of his drink then set it aside as he lined up a stroke then swung.

J.D. jogged back to his original position and aimed and threw the ball once more. Joe nodded. "Looking good."

After retrieving the ball, J.D. readied to throw again but was distracted by the sound of the ice cubes rattling in his father's cup as Joe took a drink. The clinking noise was like nails on a chalkboard to him, and he couldn't understand why, for he'd heard it all his life. His father had a drink nearly every night after work, but J.D. had never acclimated to the sound.

"Man," Joe groaned after he took another sip. "A gang, huh? Fucking Mexicans shouldn't even be allowed in our country," Joe spat as he shook his head.

"Don't talk like that," J.D. replied as he aimed and threw the ball.

"This is my house and I'll talk however the hell I please."

J.D. cast him a glance at his sudden defensive tone. "Dad, your grandpa snuck into the country illegally," J.D. said as he strolled over to retrieve the football. "America is built on immigrants."

"We're different."

"Why? Because our ancestor who snuck over was Irish instead of Mexican?"

Joe smiled faintly as he swirled his drink, sounding amused. "Where is this coming from?"

J.D. glanced at him as he returned with his football, knowing better than to look him squarely in the eye when voicing a different opinion, lest his father receive it as a challenge. "What you just said was racist, Dad, and you know it." He stopped by his father and took aim with the ball.

"Uh... if it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, and acts like a duck..." Joe waited until J.D. looked at him. "It's a duck. Just turn on the news. Nearly every rapist, murderer and thief is a fucking Mexican." He sipped his brandy.

"Because a lot of immigrants are poor. Crime is more common among the poor. It has nothing to do with race. And they're plenty of Mexican immigrants who don't do those things." He aimed and threw the ball again, missing the tire by a good three feet.

"Is this what you talk about in school?"

"No. I mean, sometimes but whatever." J.D. started towards the ball only to have his father rest a hand on his arm to stop him.

"No – I wanna know. Who is telling students that people who come from crime-ridden Mexico are innocent angels?"

J.D. yanked his arm away. "No one. Just forget it."

"No, someone's putting ideas in your head and I wanna know who."

J.D. furrowed his brow, trying to ignore the sting of brandy on his father's breath. "No one, all right? I have a brain, you know. I can think for myself."

"You sound like a fucking liberal idiot."

J.D. shook his head. "Whatever." He stepped towards the football again and this time his dad didn't stop him.

Joe watched his son as he finished his drink and set it aside, leaning on his golf club like a walking stick. "You know, you oughta start spending less time with your friends and more time focusing on your homework."

"What?" J.D. said as he picked up the ball. "Dad, that's retarded, I already –"

"From now on, you're to go to school, go to practice, then come straight home. Got that? I don't like what I'm hearing and if you won't tell me who's putting these ideas in your head, then in my book, they're all a bad influence."

J.D. tried to bite back his response as he returned to his father's side but couldn't control his frustration when the taller man was looking down at him, so smug and high off of his power trip. "I'm sixteen. I can drive. I can do whatever I want."

Joe straightened, quirking a brow. "You better watch the way you talk to me or –"

"Oh what?" J.D. asked, throwing out his arms. "You'll restrict me from going anywhere? You'll put me under house arrest like a god damn prisoner? You're not a father, you're a jail-keeper and I'm so sick of it, Dad. I'm sick of it!"

Joe's nostrils were flared as he tried to control his breathing. "Keep talking and you're gonna land yourself in a whole lotta trouble, boy."

"I don't care. I'm gonna live with Mom, anyways and get the hell away from you."

Joe pointed a finger at him, raising his brows. "You just lost your privilege to drive."

"What?"

"You heard me. I'll take you to school and games but that's it. Now get your ass back upstairs and finish your homework." J.D. hesitated, confusion marring with the hurt and anger on his face. He parted his lips to say something back but Joe cut him off. "Now!"

Dropping the football, J.D. let out a soft sound of disapproval and took a step towards the house. "You're such an asshole. I'm glad Mom's divorcing you."

Joe stiffened and J.D. knew he was watching him as he started back up the hill towards the house, but he didn't know that his father had raised the golf club like a weapon. The metal rod came down on his back, hard enough to knock the teen to the ground while choking all the air from his lungs as he fell. His back blossomed with a pain that quickly morphed from sharp to a bruising cold that paralyzed his muscles, like a giant, invisible hand holding him down. He didn't even have enough breath to cry out to ease the tension coiling around his spine. His throat grew tight from the agony working its way up his body, forming a silent howl, but just as his lungs started working again, another blow landed and he screamed as much as he could, his fingers digging into the damp grass as his body went rigid from shock.

He took in a wheezing gasp, feeling his face flush and his eyes sting with tears, and when he realized that his lungs were refusing to expand, he wondered what had happened. His thoughts were fleeting and logic evaded him, crumpled to ash in the face of such a brutal furnace of pain, and he struggled to even understand if he were dreaming or awake. The searing pain in his back intensified, constricting his lungs, filling him with liquid warmth inside. Someone must have shot him – someone must have shot him twice in the back. He screamed again as soon as he had enough air, then called out to his dad, hoping the larger man would save him, but then he wondered if he'd been shot, too. "Dad... Dad..."

"Get up," his father's voice growled.

J.D. felt like a corner of him inside was getting heavier and thicker as he tried to take a deep breath but couldn't. His father's voice was cutting through the confusing swirl of his consciousness, shredding any conviction of what was real.

"Get up!"

He didn't want to. He didn't think he even could. But his father's voice was clear and demanding, organizing his thoughts for him, and he knew he had to listen. He had to listen because it was what he always did and he didn't have the coherency or strength to think on his own anymore.

Gritting his teeth, J.D. whimpered as he struggled to his hands and knees, the agony of his back making his whole body shake and cramp up in spasms. His joints were burning and growing weak and he just wanted to lie back down and slow the rush of blood that was making his head dizzy. When he didn't make any further effort to get to his feet, he was grabbed by the scruff and yanked upwards. The sudden movement made him cry out and his vision went dark for a moment before it cleared and he realized he was standing on his feet, facing his father. Facing a ghoul that only looked like his father.

Eye to eye with the monster, who sneered at him with disgust, J.D. recognized the mask of alcohol his father wore, and he felt a surge of adrenaline lend him strength. While he couldn't fight his dad, he could fight the alcohol that possessed him. With a growl, J.D. shoved at the taller man, trying to knock him over so that he could get away. Joe staggered at the resistance then grabbed the empty glass and smashed it against the left side of his son's face.

J.D.'s vision exploded into blackness and pinpricks of light. He lost all sense of time and space and individuality as he drifted, but the pain of landing on his back on the ground snapped his meandering consciousness back to the present. Someone was screaming at him from above, shouting horrible things that he could hardly hear over the din of blood rushing past his ears. He was holding his bleeding face and trying to dig into the ground to hide or drag himself to the house at the same time, but it wasn't working. It wasn't working because his body wasn't working. There was no escape, and the lights were receding...

J.D. stilled and looked up at his father and saw that he was gesticulating wildly as he yelled. Spittle clung to the corners of his mouth and his face was flushed, his eyes unfocused. Joe was still holding the golf club, and a distant part of the teen understood that it was the golf club that had hurt him, and not a bullet. If it was just a golf club, then he wasn't dying. He couldn't be dying. The pain that was crippling him would pass, he would just have to wait it out, then he could get away.

The golf club was raised and glinted in the artificial light pouring out of the house. J.D. watched it, mesmerized as it came down and landed with a thud in the grass. After a few more hammering strokes, J.D. realized that he should be happy the lawn was getting beaten instead of him. One of his ears popped and the screaming voice of his father crashed into his head, making him wince.

"– and that stupid bitch thinks she can just take half of everything I've earned? Don't you side with her!"

The side of J.D.'s face was stinging and tightening and he knew from all the bumps and bruises of playing football that his eye was swelling up. The pressure in his chest and the throbbing, cold pain in his back, punctuated with fire, was making his jaw clench, and instead of abating, it was growing stronger and stranger, and he was starting to get so cold inside. And with the cold came fear. Gripping, manic fear that twisted everything he knew. His father started waving the golf club around again, and J.D. felt a tear leak out of his eye as he tried to find enough air to say something to placate him before the club landed on his flesh once more. "Sor... I'm sorry. Dad," he wheezed out, taking as deep a breath as he could, beginning to shake. "I'm sorry."

"You're sorry?" Joe asked, chuckling. "Oh, wonderful, that makes everything better, doesn't it? You have no fucking clue what you owe me. No fucking clue!"

J.D. could see the anger building in the man's face again and knew there was nothing he could say or do to try to calm him, and another wave of fear flooded his stomach, making his limbs tingle and shake. Joe began pacing, gesticulating with the golf club, and J.D. couldn't focus on what the man was saying, for he siphoned the burst of energy the fear had lent him into grabbing a jagged, broken shard of the glass that lay a few inches away. He knew he couldn't escape so his only choice was to defend himself.

His hand shook as he stretched his arm to reach the glass, and just as he was about to grab it, a booted foot came down and crushed his wrist. There was a loud snap then J.D.'s ears rang, reverberating with his own agonized scream. When he ran out of air, he could hear something being shouted about neighbors and taking it like a man, then something like a boot slammed into his chest, not once but three times, strangling whatever air remained out of his lungs.

The stars were back in full force, as was the rush of blood drowning out his father's voice, and when the sound finally calmed enough for him to hear the crickets, he realized that he'd been staring at the stars for some time. Sluggishly, he realized he was alone, and that if he could see the stars so clearly, the outside lights of the house had been turned off. Relief flooded him for he knew his father was gone, the screaming had ceased, and though the primal fear still clung to the corners of his existence, it was dulled by an odd sense of distance.

He was so very cold but beyond shivering. He could feel his body sinking into the ground, growing heavier and bulkier the colder he grew, as if he was being flooded inside with frozen sand. He wanted to get up because it was late and he hadn't finished his homework, but his limbs wouldn't respond to his thoughts.

The stars were beautiful and peaceful and he could see the Little Dipper, and if he could see the Little Dipper, he could see the North Star. Breathing was hard and when he'd make too much of an effort of it, the golden shooting stars would appear in the sky, warring with the silver. The image was so fey and enchanting that he took a deep breath, just to watch the sky fill with darting pixie dust. The songs of the crickets were fading as he was pulled upwards, toward the stars, and the sensation was wonderful until he realized that the stars never actually seemed closer. He knew it was his mind drifting, like when falling asleep, and the sensation was soothing.

Then something popped with a hiss and all the air on one side of his chest disappeared and he became one with the night.

**Please review! I know there are a lot of you who are reading and not commenting, and I encourage you to share your thoughts and suggestions. It will only take a few seconds, and I can't tell you how delighted I am to get reviews. Otherwise I get lonely writing this story! :(**


	10. Never the Same

**BROKEN WINGS**

**CHAPTER 10: NEVER THE SAME**

Tami let out a shaky breath that she didn't realize she'd been holding. J.D. had fallen silent and his eyes drifted leisurely to their linked hands, as if noticing for the first time that she had taken his in hers to give him support as he told her what he remembered. She followed his gaze and brought her other hand to rest on top of his, cradling his bruised and swollen fingers in her palms, like a fragile, little wounded animal she longed to protect and heal. She ran her thumb along the back of his hand that was exposed under the temporary cast they'd bound around his arm, and she wished she could shelter the rest of him as easily as his hand.

"He didn't mean to," he finally whispered, his voice hoarse.

She shook her head, her gaze shifting from their hands to his face. His recounting of events had made something rancid coat her stomach like sour milk, and his statement made it begin to curdle. "How can you say that?"

J.D.'s eyes slid back to hers, as clear and translucent as if she'd known him since he was a toddler. She knew he was lying, even if he didn't. "He wouldn't have done it if he wasn't drunk."

The line between her brows deepened. "Darling, you know that's not true."

"Tami?" he asked, his brows lifting a little in a silent plea. "You won't tell the police, will you?"

She shook her head, feeling his pitiful expression cutting her inside. "I have to."

"No, they'll put him in prison." He took a shallow breath, his eyes beginning to shimmer. "He doesn't deserve that. He doesn't –"

"He nearly killed you."

"But he saved me, too. He called the ambulance. He tried to help me."

Tami squeezed his hand. "You think he did that because he was sober?"

J.D. nodded, and his desperation to cling to some remnant of affection was so obvious that she felt her heart ache. "See, that's what I mean. When he's sober, he's fine. He didn't really mean any of it."

Tami studied him, realizing she was biting her lip. She let go of his hand and straightened in her chair. "Do you know what the doctor told me?"

He shook his head.

"Do you know why you had to have surgery? Because you were beaten so badly that your broken ribs had stabbed into your lungs, into your stomach, into your liver. You were in surgery for hours."

Fear was creeping over the boy's face, tensing his features, but she knew she had to continue.

"Your dad did that to you, J.D. He hurt you so bad... then he left you there. He left you there bleeding to death inside."

She could see that his breathing was hitching in his chest and the lie was retreating from his eyes.

"He left you to die. And before they could even operate they had to warm you up, because you had hypothermia from being out in the cold so long and losing so much blood. Do you hear me, J.D.?"

He swallowed hard, tears pooling in his eyes as his nostrils flared.

"It's a miracle that you're alive." She reached out and tucked a wayward curl behind his ear. "Thank God for that. But I don't think you understand how close you came to dying."

He blinked, trying to clear his eyes to little avail. "I..." he squeaked. "I don't like to think about it. I get so scared."

"You were saved for a reason, hun," Tami said, resting her hand against his cheek, feeling the soft prickle of stubble. "God must have something special planned for you."

He swallowed hard again, his eyes still shimmering. "I don't believe in God."

"That's fine, and if you don't feel like you survived for a reason, give yourself one. You're gonna live a remarkable life, J.D. I just know it." She smiled warmly and thought she caught his lips shyly returning the expression before worry marred his features again.

"You have to promise not to tell."

She let her hand fall away, shaking her head. "I can't do that."

"Please?" He rested his good hand on top of hers.

Tami let out a deep breath. "How is this not getting through to you, sweetie? You will be lucky if you can play football at this time next year. Lucky. It breaks my heart to say it, but you are going nowhere with football. It's over. All those dreams you had are gone. And it's all because of your father."

A tear escaped his good eye and Tami had to fight past the tightness of her throat to continue.

"Do you understand now why I have to tell the police? That man broke you in every way he could. Nothing's ever going to be the same again."

He tried to take a deep breath that sounded more like a sniffle. He glanced around the room then to the phone, as if hunting for an escape. "Can I call my mom? Please?" A sob slipped out as he spoke. "Can't she just come back? I love her so much."

"I know you do, sweetheart, and she does, too." Tami took a moment to swallow past the lump in her throat, feeling her eyes begin to sting, fighting back tears. She didn't want to cry in front of him again. She wanted to be strong to give him something stable in a world fallen into chaos. "But you have to face this on your own."

"I can't," he squeaked.

"Listen – your mom's getting treatment right now at a hospital. She had a little bit of a breakdown and is getting the help she needs."

His expression turned incredulous. "She's crazy?"

"Absolutely not." Tami shook her head. "She just needs a little extra help right now, like you do. That's why I'm here, sweetheart."

His lower lip trembled as he studied her for a few moments. "But I want my real mom."

She smiled despite the tear she had to wipe from her eye before it could fall. "I know, and you'll get her back soon, but will you let me be your fake mom for a while?"

"Fake?"

"Maybe like an aunt?"

Her question had distracted him enough to stop the trembling of his lip and he nodded a little. "Okay, I guess."

"I ain't trying to replace anyone, you know that, right?"

He nodded, looking calmer, then screwed his eyes shut as he did his best to curl up on his side. His voice was a whisper. "He's all I have left."

Tami slowly shook her head, not knowing what else to say to convince the boy of just how dangerous his father was. "J.D. –"

"When he'd tuck me in every night, he'd read me a story," he murmured. "He used to give me head rides and I'd feel like the tallest person on earth. We'd go to the beach in the summer and play catch on the sand. He's not a bad person."

"He hurt you, J.D."

"Yeah, but..." He shifted a little so that his shoulders were against the pillows. "It's not like that. He only spanked me when I was little and I'd done something wrong. He's not mean like that – he wouldn't just snap and hit me. I mean, sometimes he'd get real mad and my mom would take me for a drive with her, or send me to my room, and when we'd come back, he'd always apologize. He just has a bad temper. He has a stressful job."

"And what about everything else he's done?" Her anger at Joe and the hold he still had on his child, despite being far away, was lending her voice and convictions strength. "What about forcing you and Madison to break up? What about pushing you so hard that you started to snap? What about the way he tries to control every aspect of your life like you're a god-damn puppet?"

J.D. swallowed hard. "He just wants me to succeed."

"No, he's measuring his success by how well you do, which is insecure and ridiculous."

He furrowed his brow. "You just hate him."

Tami held out her palms. "You know what? I do. I do because I love you and he tried to kill you and almost succeeded. So I'm sorry if I can't see him for the nice man you've known. All I see is a murderous monster and I don't want him anywhere near you."

J.D.'s eyes danced over her face, the tension and worry joined by a light she couldn't place but was akin to wonder, and she waited for him to bark back a defense that didn't come. "Okay." he sighed.

Tami blinked in surprise, taking a split second to try to figure out how the hell she'd gotten the stubborn boy to change his mind after such a battle. Thinking back to what she had just said, she realized she'd disarmed him with the word "love," and the thought made her throat constrict. She wished he wasn't injured, for she wanted nothing more than to hug the affection-starved child as tightly as she could. "Okay?"

"I'll tell them what happened... but I don't want anything bad to happen to him."

She gently squeezed his healing fingers. "He's sick, J.D. He needs to know he has a problem so that he can get better for you. You're doing the right thing, hun, even though it hurts like hell."

His voice was a whisper. "I hope so."

"It might not be clear right now, but in time it will be. You just have to trust me. Have I ever let you down?"

He shook his head no and she saw that the tears that had pooled in his eyes were gone. He liked tired and sad, and she knew he needed to sleep, even if just for an escape from the stress.

"Are you gonna be all right here tonight?"

"I'm used to it by now."

"You're not gonna punch any doctors in the nose?"

He smiled a little and shook his head.

She returned the smile and rose, stooping to kiss him on the forehead before gathering her things. "I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

He nodded and shifted as much as he could to watch her leave. Tami's hand was on the door handle when she heard his soft voice. "Hey Tami?"

She glanced back at him over her shoulder. "What is it, hun?"

"I love you, too."

Tami grinned, feeling the tension and anger lingering inside vanish, and she knew in that moment that J.D. wasn't the only one who would never be the same again. "Sweet dreams, hun." She opened the door and stepped out into the busy hallway. The more she neared her car, the more her blessed sensation was warped. Though she knew J.D. wouldn't be happy with her emphasizing Joe's faults, she had to. The teen had felt like one of her own for a while now, but knowing that he accepted and returned her affection solidified her sentiments. She had to talk herself out of stopping by McCoy's house to give him a piece of her mind, or worse. Joe McCoy had nearly killed a boy who felt more like her son than even Matt Saracen, and she wasn't about to let him get away with it.

**I can't tell you how delighted I was by the reviews of the last chapter. Thank you so much! Please, keep them coming! :)**


	11. Rumble of Thunder

**BROKEN WINGS**

**CHAPTER 11: RUMBLE OF THUNDER**

J.D. was tired but he couldn't sleep. He was tired of being tired, and once again found himself wishing he could go back in time before he got caught up in this whole nightmare. He halted his line of thinking, knowing that no matter of wishing would change his present, and that he would have to adapt to survive. The prospect had seemed so vastly intimidating in the past, but now, for the first time, he felt a sense of normalcy blooming.

He had confided in Tami and she understood how he felt, and even when she didn't agree with him, he knew he could trust her words. She had nothing to gain by caring for him, and unlike his father, he didn't have to wonder about ulterior motives. She was strong and brave, and he knew that no matter what happened, she would protect him. He closed his eyes with a sigh, telling himself that everything would be all right. He had told himself as much several times in the past, but now he finally felt a grain of truth in the mantra.

The knowledge that he wasn't alone in the confusing dark was like a balm to his aching soul. Tami had offered her support several times in the past, and now he was finally ready to accept it. The changes in his life didn't seem so scary when he knew he had an ally watching over his heart.

* * *

Eric sighed as he leafed through the information Tami had brought home from the meeting. It was late, they both had to get up early tomorrow for work, and Gracie had thrown a massive tantrum at bed time. However, that wasn't why he was having trouble focusing. He was having trouble focusing because after Tami had told him what Joe did to J.D., he wanted to bash in the man's smug mouth.

"Babe?" Tami asked, glancing up from the pamphlet she was reading.

"Huh?"

"You've been staring at the same spot for a minute."

"Oh..." He blinked and tried to focus anew. "You know, all this stuff is about little kids. There's almost nothing about teenagers."

"I know," she said with a sigh, setting down her pamphlet. "Though I think a lot of it still applies."

"A teenage boy is a hell of a lot different than a five-year-old."

Tami just stared. "Are you so sure about that?"

"Well, you can reason with them a bit more, at least."

Tami rubbed her eyes and leaned back into the couch. "I have no idea what the hell you do with a teenaged boy."

Eric shrugged with a small smile. "Feed them, make them shower, feed them, make them do their homework, feed them... did I mention feeding them?"

Tami smirked. "Don't get me wrong, I wanna do everything I can for that boy, but I sure hope his mom pulls herself together soon, for his sake. He is so hurt by her."

"Well," Eric said with a sigh, leaning back with her. "He'll definitely need to go to a therapist."

"Babe, I'm a counselor."

"I know, honey, and you're a damn good one. But you're too close. You can't deal with all of this on your own."

She lolled her head to the side to look at him. "I think I'm gonna talk to the police tomorrow."

"Yeah, about what?"

"J.D. is gonna make a statement but I know he's gonna hold back. He's too afraid of hurting his dad even though his dad's been hurting him his whole life. I'm gonna make sure the detectives understand how unpredictable and controlling Joe is."

"Unless you have evidence, it's gonna be your word against his."

"Ugh," Tami groaned, rubbing her face. "I don't even wanna think about him wiggling his way out of this. The rich cockroach."

"Look," Eric said, shifting to face his wife. "What about Katie? Even if he does find some loophole, J.D. will still go live with her. The law favors mothers."

"Like that would be much better. The woman's a wack job."

Eric tried not to smirk but did anyway. "Yeah, she's wound pretty tight."

"To say the least. And what drives me crazy is I can see both of them in him – he's all tense and tries to be perfect and never thinks he's good enough and defends them. But then the next minute, he hates his parents, is weak as can be, and has so much pain bottled up inside that I don't know how he hasn't been... extinguished yet."

Eric was quiet for a long moment, his breathing steady as he absorbed her words. "Like I said, he needs therapy. And he needs to know that he's perfectly safe at our house. Because, you know, it says here," he paused as he picked up the paper he'd been staring at. "Traumatized children have much higher resting heart rates than normal kids. They can look perfectly calm but deep down, they know better than to trust the calm, and anything can set them off. He's always kinda been like that. It's what makes him a good football player."

Tami furrowed her brow. "Do you have any idea what you just said?"

"Well, I mean, it's just an observation. I didn't mean it like it was a good thing."

"But you're right." She tucked her bangs behind her ear. "Football was his outlet. You don't have to think about anything when you exhaust yourself so much that you don't have the energy at the end of the day. And it was the one thing he knew he was good at. Now it's gone."

Eric was quiet again. "We're gonna have to let him mourn."

"Yeah, we are."

Eric slipped his hand into hers and played with her fingers for a few heartbeats before kissing the back of her hand and rising to get ready for bed.

* * *

Detective Hertzer was true to his word and on Monday morning, Tami was already finalizing paperwork with TARE. Her training as a counselor allowed her to opt out of a few of the classes, and the rest she was going to take online. Given the nature of the situation, CPS and the hospital were willing to release J.D. into her and Eric's guardianship before all the classes had been finished. Their home inspection was scheduled for that afternoon, and she hoped that Julie had headed straight home after school and started tidying up like she promised.

Amidst all the stress of adding a new member to her family, Tami had two meetings and a presentation by a student concerned with the quality of the school's meals. When the school day was over, she hastened down to the hospital to try to intercept the detectives while they were there.

The two men were just leaving J.D.'s room when she stepped out of the elevator, and she smiled in greeting as she approached.

"Mrs. Taylor. How's the process going?" Detective Hertzer asked as he headed towards the elevators with Detective Malone.

"Oh, it's going great, thank y'all so much for everything."

"You're welcome, we're glad we can help."

Tami adjusted her purse strap. "Did J.D. make a statement yet?"

Malone nodded solemnly. "I'm afraid we can't discuss the details –"

"No, yeah, that's fine. I just wanted to know if I could add something."

Malone glanced at Hertzer. "Of course."

Tami took a deep breath, trying to force her words of disdain for Joe McCoy into civility.

* * *

Eric watched his players scrimmage, keeping his eye on Vince. The teen had learned a lot for being a kid who had never played before, and he was even starting to show talent. "Nice. I see a lot of hustling out there," he called after the play was finished. "But y'all need to work on your footwork. Being light on your feet can mean the difference between a –"

His phone began buzzing in his pocket and he tugged it out. With a curt nod to one of his assistant coaches, he stepped aside and let the other man take over while he answered the phone.

"Hello?"

"Don't think I don't know what you're doing."

Eric's brows neared each other in confusion until he placed the voice. His lips formed a sneer as he turned his back to the teenagers on the field. "Hey, Joe, how's it going? Kicked the crap out of any more kids lately?"

"You know, you really think you're untouchable, don't you? Like you're a pair of God damned saints."

Eric lowered his voice, wandering further towards the bleachers to remain out of earshot. "You got a problem with us taking in J.D.? Then you should've thought of that before you tried to kill him."

"Don't be such a drama queen. That's not what happened and you know it. And how dare you try to use my predicament to your advantage –"

"Oh, my advantage, huh? And what advantage would that be?"

"You think I don't know you're trying to use my son against me?"

"That's ridiculous."

"Damn straight it is. And I'm gonna fight you every step of the way, you arrogant son of a bitch. Teach you to keep out of business you have no –"

"You know, I've got a team to coach, I don't have time for –"

"He's my son." Eric could hear Joe pause to take a steadying breath, and for the first time, Eric could hear the pain lacing the other man's tone. "Mine. And I'm not letting you take him. You have destroyed our family and one of these days, you're gonna know what that's like."

Eric stared at an empty fast food cup lying under the bleachers. "You leave my family out of this because you did a fine job of destroying yours on your own. You wanna talk about something we both know? I'll tell you what we both know. You're a lying, sneaky, manipulative son of a bitch and you've been beating that boy his whole life."

"You have absolutely no proof that –"

"Not every beating leaves a bruise. In fact I think you're vile enough to have kept your hands off him as much as you could unless someone like us got suspicious. Instead, you've been emotionally abusing J.D. to turn him into your god damn puppet. He told us what happened. The moment he didn't agree with you, you smashed a glass in his face."

Joe's chuckle on the other line was hollow. "If that's what he told you, then he's a God damn liar. He's playing you and you're fools enough to believe him."

Eric chewed his gum for a moment. "If you ever want to see him again, you've gotta wake up, Joe. You've gotta wake up and get help. You're disgusting."

"He's my son, Eric. He wouldn't exist if it weren't for me and yes, I think that entitles me to a lot of respect. Do I get angry when he disobeys me? Of course I do. Did I hurt him that night? Absolutely not. And I'll tell you one thing – at least my boy knows how to show respect. Unlike that slutty daughter of yours."

Eric felt his jaw nearly lock with the flush of aggression that flooded his body. "You say something like that again and I'm gonna have to come over there and –"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Joe said with a soft chuckle. "Are you threatening me?"

Eric's nostrils were flaring. "If you come anywhere near my family – if you so much as look at my daughter – I'll call the police."

"If I didn't know better, I'd think I'd struck a nerve."

"This conversation is over."

"No, Eric, it's not. J.D. is mine. It'd serve you well to remember that. Or will I have to remind you who you're dealing with?"

Eric frowned as Joe hung up, feeling the hair on the back of his neck stand on end.

* * *

When Eric came home that evening, he found his wife cooking dinner and Julie reading Gracie a book on the floor by the fire. The sight of his family looking so happy and content made him pause as he hung up his coat, even as the scent of rice cooking made his stomach growl.

"Hey Dad," Julie said with a smile as she spotted him in the doorway, and all Eric could do was smile back, thinking how beautiful she had become. He knew his conversation with Joe had put him on edge, for he was tempted to lock the doors and forbid his girls from ever leaving his sight. After taking a moment to calm down, he finished hanging up his coat and stepped further into the house.

Tami smiled at him from the kitchen. "Sure is cold tonight, isn't it?"

"Yeah. They said on the radio that we might get some frost." He moved to stand in front of the fire, warming his hands, his eyes never leaving his daughters.

Tami noticed her husband's warm expression as he watched their children, and she couldn't help but smile. "You just missed the woman from TARE. Had to show her every nook and cranny of the house and the yard."

"She was convinced we were hiding guns," Julie said, her voice amused.

"No, she wasn't," Tami corrected. "She just asked several times where we kept our firearms."

"Yeah, after you told her we don't own any."

"Well, that's what people like her do. They're like cops – they try to catch you in a lie because unfortunately, there's a lot of shady people out there."

Eric couldn't help but quirk an eyebrow at that. "So what happened?"

"Everything's fine," Tami said, tearing up some lettuce for a salad. "They mostly needed to make sure that we had room for another child. I moved a bunch of stuff out of the office and into the garage so that J.D. can have that room. Julie set up the futon."

"Good. That's great." He tried to hide the unease from his face as he looked back to the flames, but the way Tami's gaze lingered told him that he wasn't good enough to hide his expression from his wife.

"We've got about a half hour till dinner. You wanna give Gracie a bath, Jules?"

Julie nodded. "Sure."

Eric smiled. The girls were having one of their rare moments where they were able to connect, despite their age difference, and the sight of Julie being so doting and Gracie being so full of smiles always warmed his heart. Julie picked up Gracie and carried her down the hall. Once she was out of earshot, Tami stepped over to her husband and hugged him from behind. "What's up, babe?"

Eric sighed, resting his hands on hers. "Joe McCoy called me at practice today."

Tami furrowed her brow and let go. "He what?"

Eric shot a glance down the hall then back to his wife before lowering his voice. "Look, don't say anything about this to Julie. She's already afraid of the creep."

"Why? What'd he say?"

"He must've just found out about us taking in J.D. and he sure as hell ain't happy about it. He said he was gonna fight us, then he started throwing around insults and making threats."

Tami tucked her hair behind her ears, her brown eyes growing dark with concern. "What do you mean? What kind of threats?"

Eric clenched his jaw and stared at the flames for a moment, and Tami felt her stomach cramp. If it took her husband a moment to calm himself before he could speak, then it was bad. "Not threats exactly. But he said some things about Julie," he nearly whispered. "I told him he was an abusive SOB who kept his son in line by hurting him, and he said something like 'at least my kid shows respect unlike your slutty daughter.'"

Tami straightened. "Oh, no he didn't."

"I tell you what, I've never wanted to punch someone in the face as much as I do right now."

"Punch someone? I'll disembowel that misogynistic son of a –"

"He kept hinting that he was gonna try to do something to us."

Tami furrowed her brow. "Then we should call the police right now."

"No, because as with all things Joe McCoy, he gave enough hints but didn't outright threaten, so he's safe. And the bastard knows it."

"Oh my God." Tami rested her fingertips on her temples. "Are we really back in the 1800s? I mean, seriously? He's turning this into a family feud."

"That's what he wants. And you know, he claims J.D.'s lying to us, trying to manipulate us by telling a story about his dad hurting him."

Tami shook her head. "He's not lying. And even if he was, what would he have to gain?"

Eric shrugged, staring at the flames once more. "He's a sociopath. I think he doesn't have any idea what he's done."

"Maybe he doesn't," Tami replied after a pause, watching the flames now, as well. "I mean, maybe he failed the lie detector test because he was blackout drunk. Maybe he honestly doesn't know what happened."

"Well, if that's the case, then we're in a whole lot of trouble because he can claim temporary insanity or some bull like that. And with his lawyers? They'll twist the truth as much as they can and he'll walk."

"Don't say that."

"You know he's capable of it."

Tami rubbed her face. "All right, listen, not a word of this to J.D., okay? He gets released from the hospital tomorrow and I don't want him to have to worry about any of this business with his dad, or –"

"I know. And so long as J.D.'s here, it's illegal for Joe to set foot within a hundred yards of our house."

"Thank God."

Eric wrapped an arm around Tami's shoulders, and both smiled a little when they could hear Gracie splashing in the bath and Julie laughing.

Tami raised her brows. "If he fights us on this, then we're gonna fight back."

Eric nodded. "If that man actually believes he's innocent and that J.D.'s making this up... there's not gonna be enough of that boy left to ID him if Joe gets him back."

The thought soured Tami's stomach, but she couldn't argue. The thought that the man had already targeted Julie made Tami's mind race, and she tried to think of how to tell Julie, without scaring her, that from now on, she wasn't allowed to go out unless Matt was with her. She knew Joe saw his son as a pawn, and if he could so easily manipulate his own child without regret, she feared he thought that she and Eric were doing the same thing. It wouldn't be a stretch to see him finding a way to get to Julie as revenge for their taking his son away.

She felt something akin to the rumble of thunder in her heart. Joe McCoy had already shown what he was capable of, and now that he had already lost everything worth losing, aside from his wealth and influence, the man was more dangerous than ever.

**Please leave reviews, comments, suggestion, and requests! :)**


	12. Gilded Cage

**BROKEN WINGS**

**CHAPTER 12: GILDED CAGE**

Tami was grinning when she opened the door to J.D.'s hospital room, thinking what a miracle it was that a week ago, the teen had been alone and fighting for his life, and now he was healing and heading to a welcoming home. Her smile nearly faltered when she opened the door and found him sitting on the bed with his shirt off while an intern removed his stitches. He smiled a little when he saw her, but it was clear that he wasn't without pain, which made her recover her smile to grin all the wider. "Hey y'all."

The intern glanced up from her work and smiled at Tami before returning to the task at hand. Tami glanced at what the other woman was doing, trying not to make J.D. uncomfortable by staring. Though she knew he'd had major surgery, she'd never even seen the bandages, and seeing the healing incisions was like a blow to her confidence. There were two: one on his back that paralleled his spine, diagonal to a patch of motley colored skin where a black bruise was giving way to red, purple and healing yellow. The other was on his chest, and was thick and stretched from his breastbone to his bellybutton, like a red snake surrounded by bruised, lean muscle.

The wound was still healing, she reminded herself, but she couldn't shake the notion that it was going to leave one hell of a scar. It was puckered with swelling and its Frankenstein-ish appearance was such a disfiguring contrast to the boy's youthful face that Tami felt her heart constrict. He would have to live with that scar the rest of his life. He would have to live with the curious stares and silent questions of others whenever he had his shirt off, and he would have to find a way to work past the physical reminder of his father's abuse.

J.D. was watching the intern snip and tug at the black thread, and the tightness of his mouth was a mixture of pain and distress that he was keeping just beneath the surface. Tami wanted to tell him right then and there that he was beautiful no matter what marks were on his body, that all he bore was a war wound, that scars, both physical and emotional, only make us stronger. Instead, all she said was, "How's it going?"

"Good, I guess," he said then wrinkled his nose slightly when the intern tugged a thread out.

"Well," Tami said with a smile, returning her gaze to his eyes. "Are you excited? Today's the big day."

A corner of his mouth lifted a little, but he seemed too embarrassed to show much enthusiasm in front of the intern. "I won't miss it here, that's for sure."

"They're letting you go way earlier than they said before. You must've really pissed them off." She winked and J.D. started to smile then hissed.

"Sorry," the intern mumbled then straightened, taking off her gloves. "I'm done, though."

"Thanks."

"Okay, um," Tami began, still adjusting to the sight of the injuries. "Should we be doing anything special to the incision sites or what?"

The intern shook her head. "Just watch them for infection, but everything looks good. You're okay to shower and bathe."

"Thank God," J.D. said with a sigh. "I stink."

"No, you don't," Tami said.

"Yeah, I stink like hospital."

"I think I'm immune to it," the intern muttered then gathered up her stuff. "If you'd like to come with me, Dr. Ryan will fill you in before you go."

Tami nodded. "Okay, thank you." She followed the intern out as J.D. slid off the bed. Dr. Ryan wasn't in a much better mood today than he was the last time she had seen him. He gave her a folder of printouts detailing the multiple diagnoses and care instructions for J.D., then handed her off to a nurse who helped her with the out-patient paperwork. By the time she was finished and stepped back into J.D.'s room, she found the boy patiently waiting on the edge of his bed, clad in jeans, a T-shirt and shoes. "Where'd you get that?"

J.D. glanced down at his clothes. "The nurse said my dad brought them by."

Tami tried not to let her surprise show. "He was here?"

"I guess so."

"Well," she said, recovering. "That was nice of him."

A nurse came in with a wheelchair, and J.D. got in it, though not without some pouting. Tami followed as he was wheeled to the exit, carrying the box of get well gifts. Once at the car, the nurse let J.D. get out of the chair then wished them luck as he headed back to the hospital. "This is amazing," J.D. said as he rested his hands on the side of Tami's car.

She peeked over at him as she rested the box in the trunk, noticing that he still didn't hold himself fully upright. "The car?"

"No, the sun." He closed his eyes and tilted his head up and Tami smiled.

Once they were both in the car, Tami helped J.D. buckle his seatbelt. He kept his good hand between the belt and his chest, not wanting anything to rub on his sore skin, and she glanced at his wrist bound in its temporary cast. "So Dr. Ryan told me they put pins in your arm to help it heal."

"Yeah," he said, holding up his right hand a little to peer at it. "It's not so swollen anymore so you can kinda see them. See?"

Tami narrowed her eyes and nearly cringed at the sight of metal pinheads sticking out of his swollen flesh beneath the gauze. "They said to keep it above your heart as much as you can."

J.D. propped his elbow up on the side of the door by the window, and between his raised, bandaged arm and the way he was holding the chest strap away from his torso, Tami was afraid to drive him anywhere, lest he get hurt more.

"You ready?"

He nodded and she started the engine and pulled out of the parking lot, feeling relief flood her at leaving the hospital behind. "Can you believe it's been a week?"

"It's been the longest week of my life."

Tami offered him a comforting smile. "The hard part is over, hun."

"I hope so..." He looked out the window, his lips expressionless, and Tami realized that the only smiles he'd offered that day were forced. He looked tense and timid, despite his relief, and she realized that even if he preferred coming home with her to going to a group home, it still meant leaving behind the security of the hospital and adjusting all over again. The changes he was going through were hard, and weren't any easier when taken with the fact that he was in pain, homesick, and felt abandoned by his mother and hated by his father. It was too much for a young soul to bear and she wished he didn't have to at all.

"Hey," she said softly. "You're gonna need more clothes than that. You don't even have something to sleep in. What about we stop by your house? Your dad's at work, right?"

He met her gaze then glanced at the time. It was 4:35. He nodded. "I need my books and stuff for school, too."

"It's not far out of the way. If you're up to it."

He nodded. "I'm good."

Though Tami had seen the McCoy house before, she couldn't resist staring as they pulled up. The place looked like a resort, and she couldn't help but cringe at the irony of such a fine home harboring a monster. Glancing at J.D., she thought he looked like a prince eyeing his gilded cage. "You have a key, don't you?"

He nodded then tried to reach into the backseat for the oversized plastic bag the hospital had given him with his personal effects, but couldn't reach.

Tami grabbed it for him. "What're we looking for?"

"My wallet."

She grabbed a square of black leather and noticed that it had a grinning skeleton face on one side. "What on earth is that?"

"It's Jack Skellington." He waited for her to acknowledge his explanation, but she merely narrowed her eyes with confusion. "You know, from _Nightmare Before Christmas_."

"Oh, right," she said, even though she had no idea what he was talking about. Yet it was the first hint at personal artistic expression she'd yet seen from him and she wasn't about to judge. She found the key inside and they got out of the car.

Tami took a deep breath and let it out slowly, feeling cold tension pool in her stomach. She knew Joe wasn't home, but being so close to where he lived and ate and slept was giving putting her on edge. She was in enemy territory and she knew it, as did the hair on the back of her neck that was standing on end. Yet still, she tried to mask her anxiety in front of J.D., for she knew that if she let it show, he would pick up on it and it and would fare worse than her.

She followed him up the front steps, keeping a few paces behind so that she didn't overtake him, for his walk was steady but slow, as if he was stiff. He unlocked the door then punched a code into the security panel on the wall and in a heartbeat, he and Tami were standing in the cool foyer of the large house.

"It's freezing in here," J.D. said, rubbing his right arm with his left before shuffling towards the kitchen. "I'll be right back."

Tami noticed that the first picture guests saw when they came in the door was Joe shaking hands with the governor in front of a giant keg of his company's beer. "Yeah," she muttered to herself. "Not insecure at all."

J.D. came back with a black garbage bag and led her upstairs. He had to pause halfway up and rest, holding onto the railing, and Tami rested a hand on his shoulder in worry. "This is embarrassing," he muttered. "I can't even go up stairs."

"Hun, your lung was cut open. You're doing great."

After he caught his breath, he continued to hold on to the banister and made it to the top. After seeing how flushed he was from the brief climb, Tami was glad they didn't have stairs in their house. He opened a door and slipped inside, and she was about to follow him when a picture on the wall caught her eye. She grinned, for there in the frame was one of the most adorable little boys she'd ever seen, grinning and posing with a baseball bat. He couldn't have been more than ten. "Oh my word," she said, covering her mouth as she neared the photo.  
"What?" J.D. asked, sticking his head out the door.

"Look at you. If you weren't the cutest thing. Look those blonde curls. You look like a little Peter Pan."

J.D. smiled a little when he saw what picture she was looking at. "I hated baseball. There was too much waiting around." He stepped back into his room and she could hear him going through drawers as she perused the hallway, her eyes roving pictures as the little blonde boy with crooked teeth got shorter hair, braces, a longer face, straight teeth, and finally, a Dillon Panther's jersey. She hoped Katie knew how lucky she was.

Following J.D. into his room, she was surprised by how austere his quarters were. The only evidence that a teenage boy inhabited them was a guitar in the corner and a few schoolbooks on the dresser. Other than that, the room looked like it belonged to a resident of a retirement home. "This is your room?" she asked, trying to think back to how long ago the McCoy's moved in, wondering why he hadn't done anything with it yet.

"Yeah," J.D. said, stuffing sweatpants and long-sleeved shirts into the trash bag. He yanked a hoodie out of the closet and struggled into it.

Tami was tempted to offer him help but knew that he had to learn how to navigate clothing with his injuries on his own, so instead she pretended to appraise the room. "It sure is nice."

J.D. grabbed a beanie from the closet and tossed it into the bag, and Tami noticed that he'd packed all cold weather clothing.

"Hun, it's 75 degrees outside. Don't you wanna bring some more T-shirts and stuff?"

"I'm cold. I'm always cold. I've been cold ever since I woke up at the hospital."

Tami sighed, wondering if cold sensitivity was an after-effect of hypothermia. "Well it'll take you a few months to replenish the blood you lost." She opened another drawer and found some T-shirts. "Do you want any of these? How about pajamas?"

When he didn't answer, she looked over her shoulder and saw that he had crawled onto his bed and curled up, as if saying hello and goodbye to his former home. She knew how good it felt to be back in the scents and sounds of familiarity, and hoped that he would one day feel as secure in her home.

She sat down on the edge of the bed and looked down at his reposed face. "What're you thinking?"

He shrugged and she fell quiet, giving him his space, reminding herself that he was two years younger than Julie and male, which in most cases, meant that self-reflection wasn't a strong suit. Though she could hardly blame him, for trying to articulate her own jumbled emotions at the moment was difficult enough, and she was well over twice his age. "They're in the bottom drawer," he mumbled, and Tami stood up again and pulled out some pajamas and added them to the growing trash bag.

After several deep breaths, J.D. shoved himself up and silently helped her pack the rest of his stuff before hunting out his supplies for school and stuffing them in his backpack with his laptop. "We've got extra toothbrushes and everything," Tami said. "So don't worry about that. Just make sure you have –"

Apprehension suddenly colored J.D.'s face and Tami furrowed her brow. She was about to ask what was wrong when he headed over to the window and looked out then stepped back as if he'd been stung. "Oh shit."

Tami peered out, as well, and saw a black suburban pulling up. The bottom of her stomach dropped out.

"It's my dad," he said, nearly breathless, then he moved quicker than she'd seen him since he left the hospital as he crossed the room and slammed the door shut and locking it. "You have to get out of here," he whispered fiercely, and the fear making his pupils contract was tangible.

She shook her head, keeping her shoulders square and trying to shove everything Eric had told her last night about Joe out of her head. "I'm not going anywhere," she said, keeping her voice level. "We're not doing anything wrong."

"No," he said, stepping towards her and grabbing her arm, leading her to his closet. "You have to hide. He hates you."

"J.D.," she tugged her arm out of his grip. "Don't be ridiculous. I'm not hiding."

The car door shut outside and the color drained from J.D.'s face as he locked eyes with Tami, silently screaming for instructions.

Tami took a few shallow breaths, trying to harness her own tension and exude confidence, despite her nervousness. Joe was all talk and stealth. He wouldn't do anything in an open confrontation. Not when he was being so closely watched by CPS and wasn't supposed to be within a hundred yards of his son. She took a breath and exhaled her anxiety. "You have every right to be here. Now, we're gonna finish packing then we're gonna go downstairs and leave, all right?"

J.D. looked too mortified to nod, and for a moment her worry shifted to the potential mess he was about to make, for he looked like he was going to throw up.

"Hun, just take a minute to calm down." She took his limp hand in hers and led him to the bed, sitting down with him. If she'd ever had a doubt in his version of what had happened, it was extinguished. She didn't think she'd ever seen someone so frightened before, and by the look on his face, J.D. had never felt so scared before, either, and didn't know what to do with himself.

The front door shut downstairs. "Tami?" Joe called.

J.D. gripped her forearm with both hands at the voice, as if he was afraid she was about to be ripped away from him. Tami locked eyes with him, exuding as much calm as she could, then gently pulled his hands off of her and rose, unlocking the door and sticking her head out. Her voice was friendly. "Up here, Joe. J.D. and I were just gathering a few of his things."

There was a pause that stretched for an uncomfortable amount of time. "Don't let me get in the way," he called back as he headed into the kitchen. She could hear his keys clatter on the countertop. Tami looked over her shoulder at J.D. who was still sitting on the bed and looked as if he'd gotten several years younger.

"Do you have everything?"

He swallowed stiffly then looked from the clothes bag to his backpack, slowly resting a palm on the bedspread as if his joints ached. "Um... I... I think so."

She nodded. "Okay, you've got underwear, right?"

The question seemed to shake him back to life and he nodded.

"And socks?" She asked, trying to get him to focus.

He hesitated a moment then stiffly got off the bed and opened another drawer before grabbing a handful of white socks and dumping them into the trash bag.

Tami yanked the red tape and cinched the bag shut before grabbing his backpack.

"I can carry something," he insisted, and she was glad she'd managed to get his mind back on the task at hand.

"I need the workout," she replied with a wink, then shouldered his bag and started downstairs. She stole a few furtive glances towards the kitchen as she descended the stairs, and was happy that Joe seemed to be staying out of sight. J.D. was walking a little too close behind her, and a few times his legs bumped into hers as he tried to place his feet on the same step as her. Once they were in the foyer and her hand was on the doorknob, she felt a wave of relief.

Stepping outside, she realized how heavy the bags were, but didn't slow her pace until she had reached the car. J.D. was already waiting at the passenger's side, and she realized she'd locked the doors out of habit. Setting the bags down, she hunted for her keys in her pockets.

"J.D., can I speak with you, son?"

Both Tami and J.D. looked back at the house to find Joe standing in the doorway, leaning a shoulder against the frame.

J.D. looked to Tami, and before she could shake her head no, Joe spoke again. "Don't look at her for permission. Come here. I just wanna ask you something."

Tami's lips parted in shock when she watched J.D. obey like a soldier without another look at her. "Now, hold on a second, this isn't exactly –"

"Stay out of this, Tami," Joe called, and Tami unlocked the doors and shoved the bags into the car before heading over to the two.

Joe furrowed his brow when his son paused a few feet from him, keeping his eyes on the potted plants instead of his father. "What is this?" Joe asked. "Are you afraid of me?"

J.D. swallowed before he met his father's gaze.

"Hey," Joe said softly. "You okay? How're they treating you?"

He nodded.

"What?"

"I'm okay, I'm fine," J.D. lied.

Tami paused a few feet away, her arms crossed over her chest. Nearly all of Joe's attention was on his son and she felt her nerves melt into adrenaline, and with a hint of surprise, she realized that she was ready to fight the larger man if needed.

"Look at your face," Joe whispered, sounding as if his voice was about to crack.

J.D. shifted uncomfortably, for though the swelling had gone down enough around his left eye for him to be able to see just fine, it still ached and he knew it was a dark bruise surrounding a healing cut.

Joe shook his head, looking as if he wanted to hug his son but instead straightened and rested his hands on his hips. "Who did this to you?"

"Okay, that's enough," Tami said, shaking her bangs out of her eyes before shifting her gaze to the teen. "J.D., time to go, hun."

"I said stay out of this," Joe snapped, his grey eyes flashing as he glanced to her, and as soon as he saw the look, J.D. stepped between Tami and his father, blocking her from view. "Oh," Joe said with raised brows. "You're on her side, huh? What, are you worried I'm going to hurt her?"

"J.D., get in the car," Tami said, keeping her voice level. The tension from Joe kicked up a notch as soon as J.D. made a move to defend her, and his eyes now held a bright quality, as if he were looking for an excuse to start shouting.

"No, I want a word with my son," Joe snapped then locked eyes with J.D. "I want you to apologize to Principal Taylor."

"For what?" J.D. asked.

"For telling her all these lies about me trying to kill you. You know better than to lie."

J.D. swallowed hard and Tami didn't need to be able to see his face to know that his throat had gone dry. "Listen, Joe, I know you're upset, but you're not even supposed to be around J.D. right now," Tami said. "And by delaying us you're just decreasing your chances of –"

Joe pointed at her as he took a step forward, his voice rising to a yell. "Don't you dare try to tell me how I feel, you lying, manipulative bitch."

J.D. pressed his good hand against his father's chest, trying to halt his advance on Tami. "Stop it!"

"This is all your fault and you know –"

"Dad!" J.D. shouted as he shoved against his father, only to have Joe snatch up his hand and wrench it away, brushing his son aside. J.D. let out a soft gasp, and Tami only had time to see his face crumple as his spine wilted before Joe was inches from her. Tami kept her shoulders square and her head high and didn't back down, glad that she wore heels that day for they made her more equal to his height.

"I'm gonna sue you for every penny you have."

She kept her brown eyes locked onto Joe's grey as she barked at the teen. "J.D., get in the car right now."

She could see him obeying out of the corner of her eye and waited until she heard the car door shut before backing up a few feet then walking to the car herself.

"You won't be so smug when you and that pretty daughter of yours are working the streets," Joe taunted.

Tami froze with her hand on the door handle. She felt a fire bloom in her chest, and she gritted her teeth, trying to stop herself from spinning around and mauling Joe. She knew he wanted a reaction and she wasn't about to give him anything he wanted. "Kill them with kindness," she heard her mother's voice say in her ear, just as she'd done many times in the past when Tami had trouble controlling her temper in her youth.

She cast Joe a smile over her shoulder and opened the door, gracefully ducking into the car before shutting and locking the doors. Backing up slowly to appear in control, she turned around and left Joe standing in his driveway, staring at her. She didn't even remember that seatbelts existed until she had been on the road for a minute and noticed that J.D. was holding his away from his torso while hugging his injured arm to his chest.

A few more minutes slipped past until Tami was certain she was out of view and flipped on her blinker before pulling over. "Damnit," she said through grit teeth as she leaned back in her seat, her adrenaline giving way to hurt and frustration. She blinked a few times, fighting back the tears that threatened to sting her eyes, wishing she didn't cry when she was angry.

"Are you okay?" came J.D.'s soft voice.

Tami shook her head, watching the yellowing leaves of a tree ahead as they fluttered to the ground in a gust of wind. "This was a stupid idea." She hit the steering wheel with her palm. "We should't've ever gone there. We should've just asked a social worker or someone else like that to go instead."

"I'm sorry."

"That God damned arrogant son of a bitch. I hope he rots in prison."

Several moments of silence passed, and when she looked over at J.D. she found him staring at the glove box, looking like a wounded, submissive dog. With a wave of grief, she realized she'd just snapped at him.

"Honey, I'm so sorry," she said, her voice breaking with tears. "You know I ain't mad at you. You had no say in who your dad was."

J.D. hesitantly met her gaze, looking more like the little boy in the baseball picture than the QB1. "You can be mad," he said quietly.

"I am. I am mad. But I'm mad at him, not you. And I'm sorry for snapping just now." She grabbed a Kleenex out of her purse and wiped under her eyes, beginning to compose herself, only to fall apart again when she saw how he was still cradling his injured arm against his chest. "Oh, God, he grabbed your right hand, didn't he? Are you okay?"

J.D. nodded right away, looking more upset by her tears than by the pain in his arm.

She realized she was scaring and him and bit her lower lip, a sob escaping at the look on his face. Unlocking the doors, she stepped out on the side of the road and crossed to his side of the car. "Come here, hun."

J.D. hesitated then unbuckled his seatbelt, and as soon as he was standing, Tami yanked him into a fierce hug, letting her tears soak into the shoulder of his sweatshirt. He hugged her back with his good arm, and she could feel his heart racing as fast as a rabbit's against her chest.

"I'm still learning," she said with a sniffle, calming her tears. "And I'm completely new to this so I'm gonna make mistakes, all right? We both are. But it's gonna be okay, all right?"

She could feel him take a deep breath and when she pulled away and rested a hand on the side of his face, he looked like he was trying not to cry, but nodded anyway.

**I spent pretty much all day writing this chapter, so if you could leave me a quick comment in return, it would be greatly appreciated! :)**


	13. Down the Rabbit Hole

**Thank you all so very much for your reviews. They make my day. :) And ladyranger91, I'm glad you liked the **_**Peter Pan**_** reference. I hoped someone would get that. ;)**

**BROKEN WINGS**

**CHAPTER 13: DOWN THE RABBIT HOLE**

When Tami and J.D. made it to the house, the sun was beginning to sink, and J.D. somewhat wistfully thought of how it used to be at the same angle during practice. He'd give anything in the world to go to practice now, even if it was one of the sessions that he and his teammates felt was a waste of time. It would be a vestige of something normal.

Tami smiled at J.D. as she shut off the engine. "So here we are. Finally."

"Yeah," he forced out before clearing his throat. He'd hardly said a thing the rest of the drive back, and the oddest sense of detachment had settled inside his breast. He was tired, his arm was now full of a dull throb, and he felt like he could hardly notice his surroundings. Forcing himself to pay attention to the outside of the house, he tried to feel something, anything. Excited, relieved, apprehensive. Nothing came.

Tami opened the door and grabbed his stuff out of the back, so he got out with her and followed her to the house. "Hey, y'all," Tami called as she opened the door and stepped inside.

"Hey, Mom," Julie called from her room.

J.D. closed the door behind them and paused when he heard the rumble of a male's voice down the hall.

Tami shot him a smile. "Sounds like Matt's here. Means we'll have to cook an extra meal for dinner." She winked and led him down the hall to the first door on the right. He followed her into a small room that had just enough space for a futon and a desk. Tami set the bags down and brushed her hair out of her eyes. "Well, it ain't much. And it's probably a lot smaller than what you're used to, but for –"

"No," J.D. interrupted. "It's perfect. Thank you."

Tami smiled and rested a hand on his shoulder before sticking her head out into the hall. "Now the bathroom is right across from you and I'll set out some stuff for you to use. Did y'all wanna take a shower right now or what?"

J.D. shifted his weight, feeling like he was made of lead and trying hard to shake off the unnatural sensation. _Do I want to take a shower? I might, but it would also be a lot of hassle. I feel awkward taking a shower in someone else's house, but this is my house for now. Why the heck am I even thinking about this so much? She's staring at me. I made her cry. I'm ruining her life. Just give her an answer! _"Um..."

"Hey you," Tami said warmly as Matt stuck his head out of Julie's room, sparing J.D. from his jumbled thoughts.

"Hey," Matt said with a shy smile then stepped forward to hug Tami. Julie popped out next, holding Gracie, and J.D. realized that he had somehow forgotten that the Taylors had a toddler. He didn't know anything about babies, much less how to live with one.

Julie must've caught his apprehensive expression for she laughed. "She doesn't bite, you know."

"Oh," he recovered with a smile. "She doesn't?"

Julie laughed again and if he'd been able to feel, he would've gone pink.

"Hey, J.D.," Matt said, holding out his hand. "Glad to see you on your feet again."

"Thanks," he shook Matt's hand.

"You must be happy to finally be out of the hospital," Julie said, handing Gracie off to her mom.

J.D. glanced at all four faces that were turned to him with polite smiles, and he suddenly wanted nothing more than to curl up and hide somewhere. They were making him feel terribly welcome and he wasn't used to such genuine attention. It was too much too soon.

Tami furrowed her brow at the boy's stuttered "yeah" of a response. "All right, y'all, he hasn't showered for a week. Let's give him some privacy."

"Oh man," Matt chuckled. "That's nasty."

Julie elbowed her beau then shoved him back down the hall to her room as Tami headed for the kitchen. J.D. was suddenly alone in the hallway.

"Y'all want pizza for dinner?"

Julie shouted "sure!" despite Matt's groans about how he couldn't even stand the smell of pizza since working at Panther Pizza all summer.

J.D. took a deep breath and felt an ache in his chest as he did so, but the pain reminded him of who and where he was, momentarily grounding him, and he grabbed a change of clothes out of his bag and the plastic, arm-shaped bag the hospital had given him to keep his cast dry. He went into the bathroom and shut the door behind him, beginning to feel nauseous. Whenever his thoughts or the others' voices quieted, he heard his dad shouting at Tami and was again full of the shame and fear over knowing that he couldn't protect her. That he was the reason she was facing his father in the first place. That he'd made her get so upset this afternoon that she had to pull over.

His father thought that he was a liar and wanted to hurt him, his mother had gone insane and abandoned him, and now he was bringing pain upon the one person who had been a light throughout all of the darkness that he'd been through. His throat was tight, and he realized belatedly that he wasn't nauseous after all, but that he was crying. Maybe not outwardly, but inwardly.

He'd tried to do everything right. He'd tried to follow all the rules and make everyone happy, but his world had turned into cinders anyway. The more he tried, the more wind he gave the flames and the more it burned away. He wondered if this could all be real, or if this could all just be one vivid dream. A nightmare. For what had he done that was so horrible that he brought so much misery upon those he cared about? How had he become such a terrible person?

He looked down at the scars on his torso as he tugged off his shirt. He was ugly, but he ought to be even uglier. He ought to look wretched and unloved, for it was how he felt. He ran a finger across the thick, healing wound, feeling the soreness of his flesh, and mused that he had been torn apart and sewn haphazardly back together. That was why he felt so confused, lost, and full of pain. He wasn't put back together right. For a moment, he thought of reopening his incision sites to try to fix things, but then he realized he didn't know what to fix.

Dizziness made him take a few deep breaths before starting the water. Water was clear and he needed clarity. He needed to wake up, for he felt for all the world like he'd fallen down a rabbit hole and was enmeshed in the nonsense of a malevolent Wonderland.

The water and the warmth did make him feel better, or at least made him feel human again, though it tired him terribly. Dressing took such an effort, and he had to focus to trudge across the hall to his new room. As soon as he was there, he tossed aside his clothes and crawled onto the bed on the floor and closed his eyes. He didn't sleep, for he was tired in every other way but the sleepy way, and instead, he listened to the goings on of the house.

Julie and Matt were laughing in her room, and Gracie was singing a song in the kitchen. At least he thought she was singing. It was more like stringing together a melody of nonsense, which sounded about right to him, and he wondered if being a baby who couldn't talk was as confusing and maddening as how he felt. Maybe Gracie understood.

He didn't realize that he'd drifted until he jerked awake from a dream where his father had come through the front door of the Taylor's house. A flush of adrenaline surged through him, making him open his eyes, but after a few heartbeats, he realized that the voice he'd heard coming into the house was Coach Taylor's. Sighing, he realized that he felt better after resting, and that a couple hours had slipped past. There was a small window on the opposite wall and it was now black. He vaguely remembered hearing the door open as someone peeked in on him, only to have it quietly eased shut.

"What's this?" Eric's voice asked. "Panther Pizza? Why Matt, you shouldn't have."

"Yep, I just thought, you know, might as well just share the love," Matt said.

Eric chuckled and his voice turned into a mumble. J.D. realized that he was being rude and that now that everyone was home, he should get up and make an appearance. After lying still for a few more minutes, he shoved himself up by the elbows then hissed when his arm gave a sharp pain, like a knife stabbing through his bone. Sitting the rest of the way up, he peered under the lip of his cast and saw that he'd been bleeding where the pins stuck out of his skin. Joe had wrenched it when he grabbed his arm to shove him out of the way, but the torn skin would heal, he was sure. Remembering Tami's advice from the doctor, he held his injured hand up above his heart, hoping it would ease the swelling and help with the pain.

Sitting up on his knees, he looked himself over. He was in sweatpants and a sweatshirt, which weren't exactly appropriate for dinner in his book, but just getting into a pair of pants with one hand and a torso that hurt every time he bent over was a challenge he didn't want to have to face more than he had to. He was startled out of his thoughts by a knock at the door. "Um... come in."

Eric entered to find J.D. sitting on his knees with his bandaged arm raised and wondered for a second if he'd interrupted the boy in prayer. He smiled. "Hey J.D. How you doing?"

"Good. I'm good."

"Excellent. You look a lot better. Looks like you can see out of your eye now," Eric said, gesturing to his own left eye.

J.D. nodded.

"Well, we're about to eat if you'd like to come join us."

"Okay, I just, um..." His eyes trailed over the slacks and windbreaker the coach was still wearing from practice, and realized he probably didn't need to change, after all. "Never mind."

Eric furrowed his brow. "You need help with anything?"

"No, I'm, well..." He did go a little pink this time, though he welcomed the sensation after having not felt anything for a while. At least he knew he wasn't entirely broken. But he hadn't had to get up off the floor since he was injured, and he didn't have any idea how to go about it, for bending down to get on his hands and knees was going to hurt. "Do... do you think you could help me up?"

Eric stared at him for a moment, his dark brown eyes shifting from concern to something warmer before he suddenly started forward. "Well, sure. Sure. Here." He bent over and held out his hand, which J.D. took with his left. "You know, that was pretty stupid of us to not even think about that." He helped the teen to his feet. "We're gonna have to fix that."

"I'll figure it out. Thank you."

"No problem. You wanna hold onto my arm?"

J.D. shook his head no and Eric had to fight back a smile, for the kid looked as if the suggestion had mortified him.

"We're having pizza tonight," Eric said as he headed down the hall, walking slowly to stay near J.D. in case a problem arose, for despite the teen's bravado, he didn't look too stable to the coach. "You like pizza, don't you?"

J.D. smiled. "Who doesn't?" Immediately, his father's voice popped into his head, lecturing him on the importance of a healthy diet, but the sight of everyone else sitting at the table drowned out the thought.

Eric rested a hand on his shoulder as he led him to an empty seat. "Look who woke up to join us."

The family greeted him with smiles, and Gracie saluted him with her spoon, which gave Tami a glimpse of the first real smile she'd seen on J.D.'s face in ages. "You feeling any better?" she asked as J.D. sat down.

"Yeah. I do, actually. Thank you."

"You know, we can trade, if you want," Julie said as she took a slice of vegetarian pizza then passed the box on.

"Hey, that's not a bad idea," Eric said as he sat down.

"No, I mean, thank you," J.D. said. "But I'm fine. Really."

Eric tried not to give the kid a pointed look, and wondered if J.D.'s instinct to save face and stay out of the way was going to cause more trouble than if he'd just outright demand what he needed.

"What kind of pizza would you like, hun?" Tami asked, glancing over the boxes.

"I didn't even know you ate pizza," Matt said with a smirk as he sprinkled extra parmesan cheese on his. "Aren't you not allowed to have junk food and candy and stuff?"

"Um..."

"And soda," Julie chimed in, dabbing at her pizza with a napkin, wiping off the grease. "I thought you said you can't have soda, either."

"What do you mean 'can't have'?" Eric asked Julie.

"That's what he said," Matt said, gesturing to the younger teen. "I thought you always tried to eat really healthy and stuff."

"Well, there's nothing wrong with eating right," Tami interjected, serving herself some salad. "And we've got plenty of other food in the fridge if you'd like me to make you something else."

"No," J.D. said quietly. "Pizza's fine. I just... wasn't supposed to eat bad stuff when I played football, but I guess that doesn't matter anymore." He grabbed a slice from the vegetarian box.

"Eh," Eric said after swallowing a bite. "You'll be back on that field in no time."

"I hope so," was all he could think to say before taking a bite of pizza. At first, the relish of solid food was wonderful, but after he swallowed, he began to feel nauseous again, and took a sip of milk to try to calm his stomach.

"How was school, Jules?" Tami asked.

Julie made a face while she poked at her salad, hunting out tomato slices. "It was okay. I don't think I did too well on my math test, though. There were like, all these problems that she never went over in class."

"I hate that," Matt groaned.

"I know, so like, I don't think I'll get more than maybe... 75%."

"Well, that doesn't seem fair," Tami said. "You want me to go and talk to her?"

Julie looked as if the suggestion was preposterous. "No, Mom, just because you're the principal doesn't mean you can force my teachers to –"

"I never said anything about forcing," Tami said as she stabbed some salad on her fork. "I'm just saying as a parent concerned for my child's academic welfare, it ain't right for her to test you on problems she never taught you."

"That's what they all do," Matt said. "Math teachers are evil."

Julie and Eric smirked, then the older man gave J.D. a quick once over. "Son, did you have something you wanted to say?"

J.D. furrowed his brow, feeling a slight panic as everyone looked at him. "What?"

"You're sitting there raising your hand," Eric said, gesturing to J.D.'s arm that was propped up on the table by his elbow. J.D. followed his gaze and Tami and Julie snorted in laughter.

"I'm, I'm not raising my hand. I just –"

"He has to keep it up as much as he can," Tami managed to gasp out through her giggles.

Eric looked between his wife and eldest daughter, realization dawning on him. "Well why couldn't y'all just say that? Why you gotta make fun of me?"

Julie squeaked in laughter and J.D. smiled a little when he noticed that Matt was attempting to hide his silent laughter behind his napkin. "Oh my God, Dad. You are so special."

Eric cracked a smile then looked back to J.D. "Sorry. I'm sorry. I'm an idiot."

"That's why I married you, hun." Tami chimed in. "I just make you think everything's your idea and it works out great."

"Well, thank you there, honey," Eric replied. "Nice to know I have so much support."

"You're welcome, babe."

"Oh man..." Matt chuckled as he struggled to catch his breath. "Funny as hell."

J.D. was glad the conversation had shifted away from him, and to his surprise, found the family's discussions highly entertaining. Dinner at his house, even when his parents were together, was always quiet. There were only three of them, after all. Though his mother was always sure to ask him how he was doing and gently tease him, and he missed her smiling eyes.

"Hun, you okay?" Tami asked, and J.D. broke out of his thoughts to find her watching him from across the table. "You've hardly eaten any of your pizza."

J.D. looked down at his plate and realized that everyone else was on their second slice. "I guess I'm not that hungry tonight."

Tami furrowed her brow and looked about to ask a follow up question when Gracie flung a bite of pizza off of her highchair and it smacked Tami in the face. She let out a squawk of surprise which was followed by a chorus of laughter from everyone else, along with triumphant giggles from the victorious toddler.

"That's a good arm, right there," Eric said, handing his wife a napkin while he helped her clean the pizza sauce out of her hair.

Tami blinked in shock. "Gracie, baby, I swear to God..."

"She's gonna play some ball someday," Eric continued. "She'll be pitching before you know it."

Julie rolled her eyes. "Not this again."

"Just you wait," Eric promised. "Mark my words, Gracie will be Dillon's star softball pitcher by the time she's your age."

"Yeah, umm hmm, I'll bet," Julie said playfully.

Despite her teasing tone, J.D. was surprised by the way she taunted her father, and watched Eric's reaction, only to see him chuckle as he finished cleaning the sauce out of Tami's hair. If he'd given his father the same response, he would've received a half serious rebuttal, at the least.

Though he didn't eat anything more, J.D. stayed at the table with the Taylors and Matt, enjoying their company and banter. He was relieved to see that Tami seemed to have recovered from getting so upset earlier in the day, and started to hope that the confrontation with his dad wasn't as big a deal as he thought it was.

Matt and Julie invited him to watch a movie with them after dinner while Tami and Eric got Gracie ready for bed. Julie picked a romantic comedy that was so full of cliche's that even the teens could watch it and laugh at the stereotypes. For his part, J.D. was happy with the distraction the film provided, for the world of the movie was so small and quaint and riddled with problems that weren't really problems at all. While he'd felt awkward around the young couple that afternoon, both were making an effort to include him in their jokes, and soon he felt the warm glow of common ground and acceptance.

Tami smiled at the teens sprawled on the couch and watched J.D.'s face, happy to see him looking more relaxed than he had all day. The three apparently had an inside joke about the little orange dog in the film, for when it showed up on screen, they all laughed in unison. She grew a little suspicious when she thought she heard her daughter say, "That is so Landry," but let it slide. When she was sure that they were preoccupied by the blonde business woman on the screen, who was lecturing the bohemian man who served her coffee and was undoubtedly going to fall in love with, she slipped off to find Eric.

Her husband was trying to get Gracie's attention so that he could read her a bedtime story, but the toddler was too interested in scooting around on the bed and picking out more books to read later. Stepping into the room, she quietly closed the door behind her. She'd held up this long and hadn't said a word about what happened that afternoon for J.D.' sake, for she was worried by how clammed up he'd become after the confrontation. But she'd carried the weight alone long enough. "Hey," she said quietly. "You got a second?"

Eric smiled and shook his head as Gracie picked out her fifth book for him to read. "Yeah, but my schedule's filling up. Look at all this paperwork."

Tami smirked and sat down on the edge of the bed beside him. "You know J.D. and I went by his house this afternoon."

Eric furrowed his brow. "Why'd you go and do a thing like that?"

She shrugged, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly. "He needed more clothes and his schoolbooks. His dad was at work so I figured it'd be safe. But then he showed up."

Eric didn't blink. "Joe McCoy?"

"Mmm hmm," she nodded. "It scared the shit out of J.D. and –" She hastily glanced at her daughter after she realized she'd let a curse word slip, but Gracie was too busy tasting the pictures of sweets in one of her books to notice. "Well, it scared me too. But I was very polite. I was very civil. You should've seen me. I should've won an Oscar."

"I'll bet. What happened?"

"He came home and recognized my car and knew I was there, so I told him we were just grabbing a few things and would be gone. He got out of the way and was being real respectful for a while until we were about to leave. Then he called J.D. over because he wanted to talk to him."

"Well, that's illegal, isn't it?"

"Honey, that kid is like a dog trained by Caesar Milan. I told him to get in the car but as soon as his daddy said come, he came."

"Jesus." Eric rubbed his face.

"Joe started asking him questions about who hurt him and claimed he was a liar for saying that he did it and told him to apologize to me for lying."

Eric raised his brows. "He told him to apologize to you?"

"Yep. Which was when I'd had enough of it. Then he started yelling and lecturing me and J.D. got in-between us, trying to protect me, which got Joe even angrier, and when he shoved him out of the way, I think he hurt his arm a little."

"What the –" Eric likewise glanced at Gracie and curbed his tongue. "...Blazes?"

"He's like a big old bull elephant. I just stood my ground while he was charging and he backed off a little when he saw that he didn't scare me. I mean, I was scared, I was just doing my best not to show it. But baby, he threatened to sue us."

The line between Eric's brows deepened. "He _what_?"

"I just ignored him but as I got in the car, he said something about how we'd be so poor me and Julie would have to be working the streets. I almost lost it."

Eric stared at her for the length of several tense heartbeats before he finally spoke, his voice low. "I'm gonna kill him."

"Hun..."

"I'm gonna kill him. I'm gonna kill that –" He glanced at his youngest again. "That sniveling snake."

"Look, he's hurt. I'm not saying anything that he's done is right, but the only reason he's so angry is because he's a father separated from his child. He wouldn't be pulling all the stops if he didn't love J.D."

"Or he's a God damn sociopath and J.D. is his trophy. He don't like other people touching his things is all."

Tami just stared at him, weighing the possibility of Joe being that ill.

"What other kind of father could beat their kid so horribly that he almost dies? This wasn't just an impulsive slap. And he's still denying it."

"Maybe that's how he was raised. Abuse runs in families –"

"Yeah, but not like this, Tami. This is more than abuse. This is sadism." He ticked off his points of argument on his fingers. "He nearly kills his only child for daring to disagree with him, he flatly denies that he did it, he threatens you and Julie just to get a reaction, he calls me and leaves all these taunts... That's crossing the line. There's something very not right in that man's head."

Tami slowly shook her head. "I hope you're wrong."

"So do I. But there's something not right with him. You can see it in his eyes."

Tami hesitated before meeting her husband's gaze. "Then I think we should get an alarm system

**Please leave reviews/comments/suggestions/requests. I would **_**love love love**_** to hear your thoughts!**


	14. Nothingness

**BROKEN WINGS **

**CHAPTER 14: NOTHINGNESS**

After having slept so much in the day, J.D. found it difficult to fall asleep that night. Without the hospital bed's tilt, he found it difficult to find a position that didn't press on a bruise, and his injured arm was hurting more than it had for days. He was on a smaller dose of painkiller than he was while at the hospital, and without the distractions of the commotion of nurses just beyond his door, he had nothing but quiet, which he figured made him notice the pain all the more.

His thoughts drifted to New York, and he wondered where his mom was at this moment. The thought of her being so far away no longer filled him with anxiety and hurt. While those feelings were still present, he felt a stronger sense of growing fortitude. He had Tami and her family to shelter him as he healed, but his mom was alone and across the country. Once he was better, he would be able to protect and take care of her. The motivation of the thought lent him strength, and he was determined to persevere to get to the point where he could be with her again.

There was a whoosh of wind as a car drove by outside and he glanced at the clock, wondering what someone was doing driving around a quiet neighborhood at 1:30 in the morning. He chastised himself for his paranoid thoughts and realized that he'd been biting on his thumbnail. Pulling his hand away from his mouth, he sighed and tried to get comfortable again. He wasn't looking forward to the next morning.

While Tami went to work and Julie went to school, Eric intended to stay home as long as he could to keep J.D. company and to watch Gracie. There would be a short time when he would be alone while Eric dropped Gracie off at the sitter's on his way to work, for Julie had plans that afternoon, then Tami would come home. He didn't like the idea of the Taylor's planning their schedules so that he wouldn't be home alone. He was used to the loneliness. Until he got his homework, he didn't have anything to do to keep himself busy and didn't want his time with the family to become awkward.

Returning to his previous musings, he focused on the steps he would take to get his mom home safe and sound, and the comforting thoughts lulled him into sleep. He awoke early the next morning from Julie shouting from the bathroom, claiming that Tami had stolen her hairbrush. He could hear Eric trying to mitigate the situation from the hallway.

"Honey, maybe you just misplaced it," he said.

"Dad, I didn't misplace it. I know where I left it. Mom!"

"Shhh, keep your voice down, there are people in this house trying to sleep," he reminded her, and J.D. wondered if he should get up just to let them know that they could shout all they wanted.

"Mom?" Julie called again. "Where is it?"

"Julie, for the hundredth time, I don't know," Tami said, entering the hallway from the bedroom. "Now will you quiet down, please?"

"Every time I let you borrow something, you put it back in the wrong place," Julie lectured, and J.D. could hear drawers in the bathroom being opened and slammed.

"Even if that were true," Tami said, "I haven't borrowed your hairbrush."

"What's this?" Eric asked.

There was a moment of silence before Julie spoke. "Where did you find that?"

"It was sticking out of your book bag," Eric said.

More silence, then heavy footsteps stomping away. J.D. smirked. This was better than watching T.V.

There was more chatter from the kitchen then Tami and Julie bid their farewells and the front door shut. After a few minutes, he could hear Eric start the dishwasher and his soft words to Gracie were drowned out by the machine's low rumble. J.D. slowly hoisted himself to his knees then braced an arm against the wall for support, managing to climb to his feet on his own and with minimal strain. Slipping out of his room, he found Eric trying to get the toddler to eat her breakfast. The coach smiled when he saw the boy. "Hey, how'd you sleep?"

"Good," he replied before taking a seat at the table.

"I'm sorry of we woke you up this morning."

"I was already awake." He wanted to tell him that he thought it was funny, but he didn't know if that would be rude.

"Some mornings around here are a war zone," Eric said, shaking his head with a small smile. "Ain't that right, Gracie?"

Gracie was too busy playing with her cereal to notice that he'd said her name. Eric noticed the fascinated way J.D. was watching his daughter.

"You know much about babies?"

J.D. shook his head.

"Got any little cousins or anything?"

The teen shook his head again.

Eric eyed him. "Interesting."

J.D. locked eyes with him and shifted a little, not knowing what to make of the comment. He looked back to Gracie and wondered how she'd ever figure out that food goes in your mouth. Then again, maybe she already knew that and was just having fun. He tried not to let his thoughts show on his face when he realized that she reminded him of an alien.

"Can I fix you something for breakfast?" Eric asked, snapping him out of his musing.

"Oh, um, no thank you. I think I'll just... take a shower." J.D. got up and headed for the hallway.

Eric nodded. "All right. Let me know if you need anything."

"Thanks."

J.D. stepped back into his room and paused. He didn't really need to take a shower but he didn't know what else to do. Taking a shower in the morning seemed somewhat normal and would eat up some time. He made his bed and smoothed all the blankets until there were no wrinkles, then took his time showering and shaving. When he looked at the clock after he was done, he was disheartened that only a half hour had gone by.

Not knowing what else to do, he tugged his laptop out of his backpack and turned it on. He was overwhelmed by the number of get well wishes that had been posted on his Facebook page, and several such wishes were sent in messages from people he didn't even know. There were over a hundred notifications, and the thought that each person was worried about him and hoped he got better was as encouraging as it was stifling. He started to type a status thanking everyone for their concern, then realized that he didn't know what else to say.

They wanted to hear that he was right as rain and would be back as QB1 as soon as possible. They either cared about football or pitied him, for he wasn't close to enough people to receive genuine concern. A flicker of anger coursed through him over the fact that everywhere he went and everything he did, he couldn't escape. He wanted to be anonymous and not reminded of what had happened, even if his body was insistent on keeping the memory fresh with pain.

Why couldn't he just escape for a little while? Why did a few hours of agony have to define his life? Would it always be like this?

"Hey," Eric said as he poked his head into the office that was J.D.'s makeshift room. "Mind if I use the computer real quick?"

"No, sir, go ahead."

"Thanks." Eric stepped in and turned on the desktop before sitting down with a sigh.

"Um, if you want some privacy, I'll –" J.D. began.

"Absolutely not," the coach replied with a firmness that made the teen go stiff with attention. The effect wasn't lost on Eric, who furrowed his brows a little. It suddenly struck him that J.D. might be afraid of him. "Son, I encourage you to speak up, all right? You're a part of this household right now and there's no need for you to feel like you're in the way. Because you're not. And if there's anything you need, you just ask. I mean that."

J.D. nodded. "Yes, sir. I'm sorry."

"What're you sorry for? You ain't got nothing to apologize for."

J.D. shifted uncomfortably, glancing from his computer screen to the far wall, and Eric narrowed his eyes, remembering what Tami had said the nigh before. At times, J.D. really did act like a puppy from _Dog Whisperer_, and right now he seemed confused as to how he was supposed to best please his owner. The reaction was so ingrained and unnatural that Eric felt himself cringe a little and didn't know what to say to call the kid out on it without getting another apology. He wondered if there was such a thing as a Teen Whisperer, then realized there was and that she also went by Tami Taylor.

"Just relax," Eric said quietly. "We all want you here. All right?"

J.D. nodded, looking pensive, and Eric hoped he'd gotten through to the teen. The desktop had finished startup and he returned his attention to the screen. While the coach checked his e-mail, J.D. pretended to be busy. Every once in a while, Eric would mutter "for crying out loud," or some such expression, and J.D. never knew if he was supposed to ask what was wrong or if he should just assume the coach was talking to himself.

Once J.D. was alone again, his arm began to throb and he knew he couldn't take any painkiller because he hadn't eaten anything, and he hadn't eaten anything because eating made him feel sick. Instead, he picked up his history book and started reading a few chapters, picking up where he left off in class the week before. The sections about the Irish famine of the 1840's caught his eye, for his dad was often lecturing him on their family's heritage, though J.D. had never had enough interest to search for information on his own.

Reading was making him sleepy, so after a while, he set the heavy book aside and tried to nap. He must've actually fallen asleep, for he woke up from the roar of a car engine and staggered out into the kitchen to find a note from Eric, telling him that he'd left to go to work and that Tami should be home within an hour or so. Excitement made his stomach tense, but it wasn't happy excitement.

He looked around the quiet kitchen and heard the ticking of the clock and the drip of the faucet. For several minutes he clasped his hands by his chest and felt like an intruder. After a few steady breaths, however, he reminded himself of Eric's words. He was welcome. And now that he was alone, he could do anything he wanted without anyone staring at him. But what did he want to do?

A thought struck him and he immediately went into his room and glanced about for the plastic bag full of his stuff from the hospital, looking for his cell phone. When he couldn't find it, he worried that it had been left in the car that Tami had taken to work. Retreating to the front door, he retraced their steps from the day before, looking for the most logical place she would set the bag down. He spied it on the edge of the counter, half-hidden by a newspaper.

Fishing out his phone, he turned it on and stepped into the sunshine of the patio, waiting to see if he had any voicemail or texts. One popped up from Madison, telling him that she missed him and hoped he was doing well, and to tell her when he got out of the hospital. The message was sweet, but he'd been hoping for word from his mother and couldn't find it in himself to be excited over his friend's concern. When he was sure no other messages were going to pop up, he called his mom's cell. He didn't realize he was smiling with anticipation until he got the recording that Katie McCoy's inbox was full and couldn't receive new messages. He felt his smile as it slipped away.

J.D. turned off his phone. He could try to call the psychiatric hospital, but he didn't know which one. Tami would know, but he didn't want to ask her and receive another pitying lecture about how his mom was a good person but just couldn't make the cut right now. He already knew that, and thinking about it now, he'd known that for a long time. Ever since he was eleven or twelve, he'd been able to recognize the way his father pushed his mother around with his words and how he made up for the mean things he'd say by buying her gifts.

Katie had seemed happy enough and would often show him whatever new piece of jewelry his dad had gifted to her, but he'd never been able to see anything beautiful in the pieces. They were just yellow metal or clear stones. They were cold. He'd told her as much once when he was much younger and she'd woken him up after coming home from a late date with his father. He used to tell his babysitters to tell his mom to wake him up when she got home, because he wanted to say goodnight, but this night she had woken him up to show off a bracelet she'd received and forgot to even say "sweet dreams."

When he told her the bracelet was boring, she had laughed and said he would understand when he got older and liked a girl. He did like a girl. Or at least, he had once. In the brief time he was with Madison, it had felt like the world shifted and was tilting and only felt level when he was holding her hand. But things had become strained and awkward when they were forced apart and the emotions died down. Ever since, he'd been afraid of the thought of ever liking someone that much again. He'd been willing to risk almost anything for her, for she made him feel so brave and special, but within a few months, he was comfortable seeing her only as a friend. If passion could be quelled so quickly, no matter how sure he'd been in the throes of it, how could he ever trust his feelings? Your true love one day could fade away into nothing.

Nothing. Maybe Madison hadn't faded away. Maybe he had. Because he felt like nothing. He'd felt like he was becoming nothing for a long time now, but the memory of his dad raising the glass to smash against his face was like a gutting spike being driven through the marble of his frame. Pieces had been sanded away in the past, and sometimes even chunks, but now he was shattered. He'd hoped there'd be something left after he was broken, but there was nothing. He'd wasted sixteen years on this earth.

A car pulled up and the tension in his stomach grew as the engine was shut off. Someone got out and headed into their house further down the street. The idea of a stranger being just beyond the fence made him abandon the sun and retreat back inside. He looked at the clock, dismayed to see that Tami still had a good forty-five minutes before she would come home. The clock ticked. The house creaked. Another car drove by on the street. His stomach cringed.

He felt alone and exposed, like everyone and anyone could see his nothingness and walk right through him. Like he was a beacon for his father, summoning him to come and get him when he was alone. The house was too big. It was about a quarter of the size of his house, but it was still too big. It creaked again and he went into his room and shut the door, but he could still hear the cars outside, so he opened the closet and found that there was just enough space to fit.

Stepping inside, he closed the door and hugged himself, leaning against the wall. At first the dark was oppressive, but when he realized that the loudest noise was his own breathing, he welcomed the blackness like a warm blanket. It was blank and still and colorless, just like he was. It was a friend and made him feel safe. He sank down against the wall. The air was warming up and he felt more and more comfortable the longer he hid, and the ache in his arm wasn't as strong when he held still. He felt calm and relaxed.

Time passed though not very much of it, or at least, when he heard a car door shut nearby, he assumed not enough time had passed for the sound to have been Tami coming home. Which was why he was surprised when he heard the house creak from the front door opening. His heart sped up when he realized she would think he was strange. She wouldn't understand how exposed and weak he felt. How he was drowning in his own nothingness. No one could. "J.D.? I'm home," she called.

He glanced about then felt the door, trying to find the handle. He could hear her set her keys on the counter. His left hand found the doorknob and he twisted it, pushing on the door and feeling it stick. Shoving against it as discreetly as he could, it suddenly gave and he blinked in the light spilling in from the room. Bracing a hand on the doorframe, he stiffly stood up enough to step out, only to fall on one knee when he found Tami staring at him in shock from the office doorway, holding Gracie. The toddler laughed and pointed at him.

Tami blinked, her brown eyes intense. "Were you hiding in the closet?"

He felt all the blood in his body rush to his face and tried to think up a lie, but his brain was stuttering from the way she was looking at him. "No, I..."

She stepped forward and held out a hand and helped him to his feet. "Honey, you're shaking."

"I guess you just startled me is all."

Tami held his gaze while Gracie squirmed in her arms. "Are you lying to me?"

He forced himself to look her in the eye, even as he shifted his weight nervously. "No," came his defensive response, but when her brown eyes continued to bore into him he couldn't meet her gaze any longer. "Yes."

Tami set Gracie down and the toddler headed over to his backpack and began pulling out papers, providing him a distraction him from his foster mother's tense expression as she rested her hands on her hips. "J.D., what's going on, hun?"

He shrugged a little, watching Gracie pull apart his math test. "Nothing."

Tami let her shoulders drop. "All right. Well, can I make you anything to eat?"

"I already ate, actually. Thanks though," he said, briefly meeting her eyes again, surprising himself by how easily the lie came out.

"All ri – Gracie Bell," she scolded as she noticed what the little girl was doing and scooped her up. "I'm sorry." She wrestled the papers from her daughter's grasp. "That looks important."

"It's just a math test." He took it from her, noting how wrinkled and torn the papers now were. "It looks better this way, anyway."

Tami smirked a little and carried Gracie out, and as soon as she was gone, J.D. quietly closed the closet door, feeling his blush renew itself with a flash of heat. He knew Tami didn't really believe him and that her response was an attempt to placate him. He had let her down. He couldn't do anything right. He was nothing, and he was so tired of fighting to forget what happened, fighting to put on a brave face for others. The tension inside of him began to dissipate like water from a popped water balloon. The answer was so simple. All he had to do was give up.

Once Tami's back was to the boy and she was headed down the hall, her mock-amused expression faded and concern made her scowl. She'd let him off the hook because she was afraid of what would happen if she didn't.

For a while, Tami was paranoid that Joe had called or showed up or done something to intimidate his son, but after a few minutes, she was able to acknowledge the fact that despite her best intentions and efforts, J.D. was not okay. Not only was he not okay, but she had the creeping sensation that he was getting worse. She was tempted to text Eric to consult with him on what her next move should be, but she knew that would only make him worried all practice and interrupt his focus, she decided to wait to talk to him when he came home.

J.D. didn't come out of his room, and when she stuck her head in a couple hours later to ask what he'd like for dinner, she found him awake but lying in bed with the saddest eyes she'd yet seen. For a heartbeat she thought it was the contrast of his sky blue eyes with the dark bruise that made his expression so intense, but when he failed to react to her arrival, she realized that he was so deep within himself that he hadn't noticed her. There was no masking such dejection. "Hun?" she whispered, and he blinked and looked to her. She offered a pained smile. "You want anything special for dinner?"

He shook his head no, or at least she thought he did, for the movement was so subtle that it was easy to miss.

She took another step into the room. "You wanna talk about anything?"

He shook his head no again, and Tami suddenly felt uncomfortable, for even at his worse, J.D. had never been so catatonic.

Swallowing hard, she nodded. "Okay, well, maybe later, then." She waited for a response she didn't receive and slipped back out, closing the door behind her but sure to leave it open a crack. Her throat felt dry and she let out a shaky breath as she strode down the hallway. Once in the kitchen, she poured herself a glass of wine and took a swig. She stared at her phone on the counter, once again tempted to contact Eric. Instead, she grabbed it and stepped outside to make an appointment with one of the therapists the hospital had recommended.

**Please share your thoughts. :)**


	15. Bravado

**BROKEN WINGS**

**CHAPTER 15: BRAVADO**

Eric was quiet but his breathing was tense as he helped Tami prepare dinner. His wife kept shooting him sideways glances as she stirred the spaghetti sauce. "Hun, what're you thinking?"

The football coach sighed and set aside the knife he was using to chop up lettuce for a salad. He kept his voice quiet. "That mental illness runs in that boy's family. His mom's committed and his father is a –"

Julie walked in, carrying Gracie and set her down at the coffee table.

"I'm just saying, that I don't think he's gone off the deep end, but what if he does?"

Tami sighed. "You mean how will we know when he does."

Eric pursed his lips. "Exactly."

Tami shook her head and shrugged. "I set up an appointment for him the day after tomorrow. It's the earliest I could get in."

"Good." He resumed his lettuce chopping.

Julie was curled up on the couch, chatting with Matt on the phone while Gracie played with her toy ponies on the floor. Tami watched them for a moment before draining the pasta. "Did he eat anything while you were home?"

Eric shook his head as he began slicing a tomato. "I don't think so."

"Well, he didn't eat anything after I got home and claimed he had."

"Maybe he ate while we were gone."

Tami gave him a blank stare as she set the pot back on the stove and reached for the olive oil. "You think he feasted on buttons while hiding in the closet?"

Eric sighed softly and looked away. "So he's lying."

"It's not the fact that he's lying," Tami said, tossing the pasta. "It's the fact that he is lying to try to pass off as being normal. He's trying to pretend he's fine when he's not, and what does that tell you?"

Eric paused for a moment as he tossed the tomato slices into the salad bowl. "That he doesn't trust us."

"Exactly."

He looked at his wife over his shoulder and found her with her hands on her hips.

When Tami poked her head into J.D.'s room to try to bribe him to eat something, she found him sound asleep and looking so finally at peace that she didn't want to disturb him. Instead, she gently tugged one of the blankets up and rested it over him before tip-toeing out. After dinner, she rifled through the pamphlets from TARE and tried to find one about anorexia, then realized that she was far too hopeful of finding answers in print. There was no rulebook for motherhood. Only instincts.

Sighing, she flung the pamphlets away from her and rubbed her eyes. She knew this was going to be a challenge before she got into it, but she had anticipated anger and frustration and tears, not apathy. J.D. had opened up to her in the hospital. He had shared his hopes and fears and pain, and now he was silent. What had changed? What had she done wrong? Everything had been going fine until... the answer hit her, making her heart clench with a wave of guilt.

The next morning was overcast and raining, and when the family was getting ready to head out for the day, Tami invited herself into her adopted son's room and took a seat on the computer chair. She rested her elbows on her knees and looked down at him with a quiet sigh. He was lying on his right side with his back to her, exactly as he had been the previous evening, and if it weren't for the rumpled blanket, she would've thought that he hadn't moved at all. His eyes were open, but only the smallest bit, and she couldn't tell if he honestly hadn't noticed her entrance or if he was just ignoring her.

"So... I screwed up," she said, wincing at the audibility of her own voice in the quiet room. "I hoped I'd already made that clear and apologized... but I see I didn't. I screwed up big time. I never should've taken you back to your house."

His shoulders minutely rose and fell, as if with a deep breath, but that was her only response.

"And I know that being back in that house scared you, that seeing your dad again scared you, and that seeing me break down a little scared you, and all of that is okay. That's fine. But I also want you to know that it was a mistake and I am so sorry. I never meant to put you in any danger and I will never do something like that again."

She paused to let out a long breath, raising her brows as she tried to think of what to say next, reminding herself that the wall she was talking to had eyes and ears and a heart.

"I don't expect you to forgive me, J.D., but I do hope you believe me when I tell you that you are safe, and welcomed, and loved here. And I mean that with all of my heart."

An engine started up in the driveway as Julie headed out.

Tami rose and bent over the boy, trying to see his face, and was happy that he wasn't expressionless. He was biting his lower lip and met her gaze when she spoke again.

"I know this is a huge change and that there's a lot to adjust to. But there's nothing to be afraid of here, okay?"

He didn't nod his agreement, but that fact that he was looking her in the eye was enough for the moment. She offered him a small smile then slipped out, straightening her skirt as she headed down the hall. She was tempted to call in and ask for a personal day, but there was too much on her agenda that morning. She hugged and kissed Eric and Gracie goodbye, and Eric assured her that he'd let her know if there was a change.

With a heavy heart, Tami headed into work. The bureaucratic nonsense of administration proved a welcome distraction for most of the morning, and she began to regain her confidence as the day went on. She texted Eric at lunch to see how things were, and he said he'd offered to make J.D. a sandwich and that the kid had actually said "no thank you" in response, which was better than nothing. Tami started to worry over his lack of appetite, for she'd never known a teenage male to turn down food, much less an athlete. It had been at least a full day since J.D. had eaten, maybe two, and she felt bad over not having kept better track.

A knock on her door broke her out of her musings as she decided that she'd make chocolate chip pancakes for dinner to try to coax the teen into eating something. "Come in," she called, then nearly went rigid in her chair when Joe McCoy walked in through her door. Her pleasant tone immediately dissipated with one look at his smug face, and she felt a flush of fear in her chest. "Can I help you?"

Joe held up two hands in mock-defense as he invited himself to sit down. "Now, Tami, just hear me out."

"Principal Taylor," she corrected.

Joe nodded. "Principal Taylor. Look..." He sighed and regarded her for a moment, his lips tight. "I just wanted to apologize for anything hurtful I might have said the other day. You caught me by surprise and this is a very emotional situation for me."

"Yeah? It's a lot more emotional for your son," she quipped without even pausing for a breath.

"Granted," Joe said with a nod. "As a parent, I'm sure you can understand how difficult it has been for me to be separated from my child, on top of everything else that has been going on in my personal life."

"Difficult? Let me ask you this Joe," she hissed, her voice low. "If you were so happy to see your son again, why did you yell at him instead of hug him? Why did you push him out of the way instead of talking to him? Why did you call me names in front of him instead of controlling your temper? Because you can't control your temper. You can't and –"

"I can control my temper just fine –"

"No, you can't and the longer you're in denial about that –"

"What irks me, though, is holier than thou busybodies adopting my son like he's a dog they found on the streets."

Tami furrowed her brows, leaning back in her chair. "Did you really just call your son a dog?"

Joe shook his head. "He's a human being, Tami. And he's my child. He's not a project for you. He's not an innocent in this whole situation. You just remember that."

"Yeah, you know what? I will remember that, seeing as he's the one who has been making threats, throwing insults and trying to intimidate my family."

Joe's smug smile appeared. "All you have is your word against mine."

"And given that I'm J.D.'s legal guardian right now, that counts for a whole lot more than yours."

She'd struck a nerve and it showed on Joe's face. His smug expression tensed and his pupils contracted, making his eyes look strained and unnatural as he leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. His voice was almost a whisper. "I'm gonna get my boy back. Just you wait and see."

Tami leaned forward as well, refusing to show that his tone and demeanor unsettled her. "Mmm hmm and you know why? Because without that boy, you're nothing, aren't you? Just a washed up old football player with an empire of dirt. No wife, no family. Just your sad, lonely self. And you don't like being around yourself, do you? Especially when you ain't got that child around to beat and control to make you feel like you're someone. Like you're in charge after all."

Joe's nostrils were flaring and his jaw was clenched. If she'd broken eye contact to glance to his knuckles, she was sure they'd be white.

"You just can't stand it when you ain't in charge. And the only thing worse than you not being in charge is a woman being in charge instead."

He slowly cracked a smile before letting out an incredulous chuckle. "You really are something, Tami."

"Principal Taylor. And I'd appreciate it if you left my office, now. I've got work to do."

Joe looked back to her, his eyes narrowed from his smile, the lights overhead bouncing off of them eerily. "You know, I'm surprised you're working instead of taking care of my son. But then again, I suppose your husband doing a half-assed job that doesn't start till the afternoon helps, doesn't it?"

Tami pointed to the door. "Out, Joe."

Joe shook his head, still looking amused as he rose. "I didn't want to have to do this, but you'll be hearing from my lawyers shortly."

Tami nodded, plastering on a smile that she knew would drive Joe up the wall, and the tall man nodded and slipped out. Once he was gone, the smile slipped off her face and she wondered how much it would cost to file a restraining order against him. She had thought he would back off after what happened at the house, for she could use that confrontation against him, but the fact that he was ignoring common sense and seeking her out anyway left her with a sour taste in her mouth.

Eric had stayed home until Julie returned from school, then left to get to practice as fast as he could. When Tami got home, she found her eldest daughter in her room, listening to music and doing homework, and Gracie dancing to _Yo Gabba Gabba!_ on TV. She couldn't help but laugh at the sight. "Darling, that is some beautiful dancing," she said, making Gracie giggle and dance all the more enthusiastically.

After setting down her stuff, Tami slipped out of her heels and made her way down the hall. She popped her head into Julie's room. "Hey, Mom," Julie greeted with a smile.

"Hey sweetie." She lowered her voice a little and pointed down the hall. "Has he come out at all?"

Julie had the eraser of the pencil to her lips and shook her head no.

Tami sighed and headed back down the hall to peer in at J.D. He was still curled up on his side, but this time, he was biting his thumbnail. "Just wanted to let you know that I'm home."

He didn't respond, and Tami gave him a few more seconds before quietly shutting the door behind her. She entered the kitchen and tapped her finger on the counter, lost in thought. She already had done everything she could think of to help J.D. She had apologized, promised to never do it again, and... she realized that after seeing Joe McCoy this afternoon that his father had probably made similar promises that he broke, so she realized her word wasn't as good as she thought it was. The boy was used to being lied to and manipulated.

But even his mistrust of her word didn't account for his nearly catatonic state. She might not have a Ph.D in psychology, but she knew that food played an important role in everyone's moods, and that the fact that he hadn't eaten in two days could very well be making J.D. feel like he was dying. The rain outside began to sound as a steady roar on the roof and she knew Eric would end practice early or else the field would become a mud pit. Heading into her room to change, she decided to go ahead and get started on the pancakes, only half joking when she thought that if the pancakes didn't lure J.D. out, then she'd squirt chocolate syrup down his throat.

Just as she predicted, Eric came home an hour early, drenched and cold, and nearly fainted at how good "dinner" smelled. After he'd showered, he helped her set the table, muttering about his weak defensive line until Tami finally spoke up. "Joe McCoy came to see me today."

Eric dropped the fork he was about to set down. "He _what_?"

"Allegedly, he came to apologize. But he didn't do much but make snide remarks."

"Well, what did he say?"

"That he wants J.D. back. That we're busybodies."

Eric blinked for a few seconds. "That guys a God damn broken record."

"Don't I know it? So I told him he was a lonely, pathetic piece of shit and kicked him out."

Eric's half smile looked afraid to blossom. "You didn't."

Tami shot him a coy look. "No, not in so many words, but I wish I had."

Eric chuckled and abandoned the table to hug her from behind and kiss her neck. "Were you scared?"

"A little... but the more I'm around him, the more I feel like I can see through his bravado. He's like a fighting bull. All show in front of a crowd, charging at everything that moves."

"No brain," he murmured against her.

Tami sighed and leaned back into his touch. "J.D. didn't eat anything today, did he?"

"Nope."

She flipped a pancake. "I haven't met anyone yet who can resist my buttermilk flapjacks."

"You know, I've been thinking about him. That kid is darn used to following orders. He don't know how to think for himself. He's never had to. We should just command him to eat a pancake."

Tami furrowed her brow at him. "Command him to eat a pancake? Are you serious?"

"Why not?"

"Because the whole point is that we're trying to be different than Joe, that's why not. If we start issuing commands, we're not gonna be any –"

"Not commands," Eric corrected himself with a wince. "I just mean he's used to a very structured life. We're used to a pattern but not a structure. And especially when everything else he knows is in limbo, he needs something solid to hold onto."

Tami nodded slowly. "So, what do you suggest?"

"You picked up his homework today?"

Tami nodded.

"Then let's start there. That'll give him something to work on. What he needs are goals to fulfill so that he feels like he's making progress. Because honestly, I think his only problem is that he's scared shitless. He's so scared that he can't even think straight."

Tami continued to nod as his words sunk in, striking truth. She took a deep breath and let it out, handing over the spatula and apron to Eric.

"Whoa, whoa, what're you doing?"

"I'm gonna go talk to him."

"Right now? What about dinner?"

"You can flip a damn pancake, can't you? And don't forget to put chocolate chips in the next batch."

Eric chuckled as Tami made her way down the hall and lightly knocked on J.D.'s door. "Hun, can I come in?"

There was no response, but she hadn't expected one, so she let herself in anyway. She found the boy exactly as she had left him and sighed as she shut the door.

"I'm making pancakes." She sniffed, hoping the enticing odors had wafted in, but not much had made it under the door. "Well, actually, Eric's making the pancakes right now but I did the important part."

She thought she saw him sigh a little, and decided that since he was her foster son, it was time to start treating him the same way she treated her biological children. She pulled her hair back and lay down beside him, hugging him from behind. He was quivering ever so slightly, but she knew the tremors were more from fear than they were from cold. After a few moments, she hugged him tighter, and as her body heat joined with his, making them both glow, she felt the shaking begin to fade and she smiled. There was no need to speak, so she lay quietly, holding him until she felt that he had completely relaxed.

"You know," she whispered after several minutes. "My feelings are really gonna be hurt if you don't at least try one of my pancakes."

He didn't say anything back, but she could feel him shift a little at her voice.

"And I'll bet you that if you eat something, you'll start feeling better."

She could feel his ribcage expand as he sighed. "I'm not hungry," he mumbled, his voice hoarse from being quiet so long.

She tried not to go rigid over the excitement of getting him to speak. "Baby, you have to be hungry. You haven't eaten in almost three days. You know what I think?"

He shook his head.

"I think that it hurts you to eat because your stomach has gotten so small. And that pain reminds you of all of the other pain you've had since you were attacked. And that makes you even more afraid than you already are."

She could feel his heartbeat speed up a little and waited until it calmed down again before continuing.

"I'm glad that you're afraid, you know why? Because if you're afraid, it's because you know there's something you haven't lost yet and you're worried it'll be taken from you."

"That's not true," he said.

"Oh?"

"I don't have anything anymore. I'm nothing."

His heart was speeding up again, but she knew she couldn't wait for him to calm down once more, since the more riled he got, the more he spoke. "Why would you say that?"

He took a few moments before he answered her. "I can't play football anymore and..."

She rubbed his arm, feeling his torso tense. "And?"

"And I'm forgetting my mom," he squeaked, and she realized he was starting to cry. "Because you're here, and I like you better than her. I can't like you better than her."

"Oh honey..."

"And I have to get better because she needs me, but I can't get better."

"Sure you can, sweetheart, it's just gonna take time. You have to be patient."

He tensed again and she was sure another set of twin tears were escaping.

"Have I told you how proud of you I am? You have been so brave. So very brave. But you know what? You don't have to be brave anymore. You can be sad and angry and everything else that you're feeling. You're entitled to feel those things. But I don't want you to ever feel like you're nothing. Ever."

"There is nothing else that I'm good at," he said with a shuddering gasp. "Nothing else that makes me worth anything."

"What do you mean 'worth anything'? You're a living, breathing human being. You have so much to give. We're all here for a reason. And you are not alone."

"Then what's my reason?"

"That's what you've gotta find out on your own, sweetie. That's what we've all gotta find out. But you are so important to me. Never forget that. And if I'm important to you, too, that doesn't mean that your mom isn't. It means that I'm here right now and she isn't and that's all it means. It's not something you should feel guilty about."

He shifted a little as he wiped at his cheeks with his sleeve.

"But y'all should feel guilty about not eating one of my pancakes." She sat up as she finished the sentence and was able to see him smile. "Meet me halfway and at least try one?"

He nodded and wiped at his cheeks again. She gave him a few minutes to collect himself then helped him to his feet.

**Please don't hesitate to share your thoughts!**


	16. Friday

**Author's Note: **Just a little reminder that this story is a continuation of season 3, meaning that East Dillon never opened up. Vince and Landry play for the Panthers. Tim did quit college and come back, though, like he did in season 4.

**BROKEN WINGS**

**CHAPTER 16: FRIDAY**

J.D. was back on the lawn, staring up at the stars, feeling his lungs fill less and less with each breath. Cold was seeping into his bones and he knew Death was trying to maul its way in. It would happen soon. He wouldn't be able to breathe and he would become so cold that he would never move again. His chest constricted and he felt his lungs choke. This was it. It was over.

Then he felt a hand on his arm, a warm hand. He summoned all of his strength and lolled his head to the side to see his foster mother smiling at him, her eyes and lips full of affection. His right arm began to burn and send shooting pain up his shoulder, and he remembered that this had already happened. It had already passed. He was alive and healing and safe. He wasn't back on the lawn. He was in a new bed in a new home.

He tried to part his lips to ask Tami what was happening, to ask why he was back out in the cold, feeling like he was dying, but no words came out. He felt warmth spreading from her hand all the way into his body, fighting off the cold, and he stopped trying to speak, for she was bringing him to life. His breath started to cloud before him again as he regained heat, and the heavy feeling in his middle began to lift. He took a deep breath and felt no pain. Chains no longer constricted around his lungs. He was free.

But just as he took a deep breath, a shadow blocked out the stars. His father glared down at him, his eyes glinting in the starlight. He reached out and grabbed him by the shirt, yanking him upwards, tearing him away from Tami's warm hand. The cold crashed through him once again, choking him, drowning him, and his father smiled at his suffering. He tried to scream but couldn't find the air, so he tried again, and with each scream that didn't come, he grew more and more panicked. The stars turned into whirling dervishes and his ears were full of the hate coming from his father's spittle-flecked lips as he shouted and shouted and shouted...

J.D. didn't realizing that the shouting was his own voice until the hand on his arm jerked him awake, and he cried out in pain as fire erupted in his wrist and shot up his shoulder, spreading into his chest. He curled around his wounded appendage and felt another hand on his back as the lights flicked on. Someone asked him something and J.D. realized his feet were tangled in his blankets. He took a few steadying breaths as he reminded himself of the real world and tried to shrug off the dream, but his arm was filling him with agony.

"Son, you all right?"

J.D. blinked in the light. That was Coach Taylor's voice.

"Hey," Eric said again, almost whispering as he slid his hand from the boy's back to his shoulder. "Did I hurt you? You all right?"

J.D. nodded as he unfurled and the pajama-clad man came into focus. "Sorry," he muttered before attempting to sit up on his knees, only to sway on the spot.

Eric braced his shoulder and kept him from toppling over with a "Hold onto your horses, there, kid."

"Hun, he looks about to be sick," came a voice from the doorway, and J.D. looked up to see Tami watching with a concerned expression.

Eric's hand tensed. "You gonna throw up?"

J.D. looked into the man's concerned brown eyes and realized that they were both holding still. How could they both be holding still when it felt like everything was spinning?

Eric furrowed his brow at the teen's confused gaze and pressed a hand to his forehead. "He's burning up."

"Oh God. I didn't even know he was sick."

"I'm not sick," J.D. managed to mumble, looking between his foster parents. "I just... I was dreaming..."

"You had a nightmare," Eric said, sighing through his nose. "And you had a nightmare because you have a fever. Hun, will you get the thermometer?" he asked over his shoulder.

Tami nodded and strode down the hall.

"I'm not sick," J.D. repeated, wondering if they didn't hear him the first time.

"You been keeping an eye on your incision scars? The doctor said those could get infected," Eric said, keeping his hand on the teen's shoulder, realizing with dismay that there was less of it there than there used to be. "Why don't you just lie down and let me take a look."

"I'm fine."

Eric locked eyes with the boy. "Please?"

J.D. sighed and eased down onto his back, cradling his right arm against his chest, wondering how no one else felt the fire coming from his wrist. He thought it was enough to ignite his clothing.

Eric gently tugged up the teen's sweatshirt and shirt and had to check himself to keep from staring. The incision site was healing well and showed no signs of infection, but it was pink and long and grotesque against the young skin. When coupled with the sight of the boy's body wasting away beneath the scar, Eric felt his heart surge with compassion and anger, for he wanted to help J.D. get well as much as he wanted to hurt the man who did this to him. "That looks all right," was all he was able to say as he tugged the clothing back in place. He looked over his shoulder and locked eyes with Tami, who had returned with the thermometer and a glass of water, and the shadow in her eyes betrayed that she had the same thoughts as her husband.

Clearing her throat, she stepped in and had J.D. hold the thermometer under his tongue. She glanced to Eric, keeping her tone light. "So everything looks all right?"

Eric shrugged, still clearly haunted by what he'd seen, but managed a casual response. "Far as I can tell." He shifted his gaze to J.D.'s face. "You think that pancake made you sick?"

J.D. and Tami simultaneously furrowed their brows and while J.D. muttered an incoherent response around the thermometer, Tami let out an indignant, "Oh, come on now."

Eric smiled a little and held up a hand in mock self-defense.

The thermometer beeped and Tami took it from J.D. then gave the teen a stern look. "103.5. Hun, I think we should go to the hospital. No one gets a fever this high without having something seriously wrong."

Fear flickered in his blue eyes. "I'm not going back to the hospital."

Tami motioned for him to sit up and he struggled to comply. She held out the glass of water and as Tami told him that it might not be negotiable, Eric studied the way J.D. kept his right arm to his chest and took the glass in his left. Once the boy had drunk the glass, Eric held out his palm. "Let me see your right arm."

J.D. furrowed his brow. "What?"

"I won't hurt you, I promise. I just wanna look at it."

J.D. reluctantly began to pull it away from his chest. "Be careful."

Eric nodded. "I will." He let the boy's wrist rest gently in his hand then felt his fingers and winced at how warm and swollen they were. Tami shot concerned glances between the two of them as Eric contorted to try to peer beneath the cast. "Honey, will you go get me a flashlight?"

"Sure." Tami slipped out again and while she was gone, Eric noticed that J.D.'s body was poised and tense, as if ready to snatch his arm back at any second. He wanted to offer some words of reassurance to the kid, but he knew there wasn't really anything he could say that would calm him as much as letting go of his arm. But if his arm was causing him to look like a wolf with a leg caught in a trap, it had to be hurting like hell. "Here we go," Tami said as she stepped back in with a flashlight.

Eric pointed to the opening of the temporary cast. "Just point it right there, could you?"

Tami tucked her hair behind her ears and bent over beside her husband, shining the light where he directed. Eric winced when the beam illuminated what he was afraid he'd find. J.D.'s arm was swollen more than was necessary, and dried blood clung around the pins sticking out. "It didn't look like that when we left the hospital," Tami said.

"No, I'll bet it didn't," Eric replied, his voice tight. "I'll bet you it started looking like that after Joe grabbed it."

"He didn't know my arm was hurt," J.D. said so quickly that Eric wondered if his defensiveness of his father was automatic. "My sleeve was covering my cast."

Eric locked gazes with the teen. "He did this to you. He broke this arm. He knew your arm was hurt, son."

J.D.'s alertness deflated a bit as his coach's words trickled in, and Eric couldn't help but wonder how much longer J.D. would continue to defend his father before he gave up and accepted that the man was a brute.

"All right. You need to take this off, son," Eric said, gently releasing J.D.'s wrist and touching his sweatshirt.

J.D. nodded and began to comply while Tami looked between the two. "So his arm is infected?"

Eric helped the teen gently tug the sleeve off of the cast, but J.D. still hissed and winced a few times. Once it was off, Eric pointed out am angry red streak snaking out from under the end of the cast, heading up J.D.'s arm. He sighed. "Yeah. It's infected."

"That looks pretty bad," Tami said, a thin line between her brows.

"That's because it is pretty bad," Eric quipped quietly. "Red streaks like that mean the infection's progressed." He sighed. "I'll go get dressed. We need to take him to the ER."

J.D. tensed. "What? Why?"

"Because there's a chance it'll spread into your bloodstream and then you'll really be in trouble," Eric said as he rose.

"I'll drive," Tami offered.

Eric shook his head. "You've gotta be up first thing in the morning. Try to get some sleep. I'll take him."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, babe." He kissed her cheek as he stepped past, heading for their room.

Tami ran a hand through her hair and sat down in the desktop's swivel chair. "J.D. did you know about this, hun?"

He hesitated then shook his head no. "It's been hurting but I thought it was because I haven't been taking my pain pills because I hadn't eaten anything."

She nodded, noting the flush in his cheeks and the tint of glassiness to his eyes from the fever. "Are you gonna be all right with Eric taking you?"

J.D. sighed softly and lay back down, his back aching with fever pains. He nodded.

A few moments passed in sleepy silence before Eric returned, dressed in jeans and a T-shirt. He tossed the keys in his hand and kept his voice quiet. "You ready?"

J.D. forced himself up again. "I'm in sweatpants..."

"Honey, they don't mind what you look like. It's an ER," Tami reminded him then glanced at the clock. "And it's 3:45 in the morning."

Grabbing his sweatshirt, J.D. started to his feet and took Tami's hand to help him up. She gently hugged him goodbye and kissed his warm temple before walking the two to the door and seeing them out. The fact that J.D. was staggering like a drunk would've been funny had he not been so ill.

Once at the ER, the two settled down in the waiting area. J.D. wasn't being very mindful of his surroundings so Eric picked a spot where they were as far away as possible from the drunk and the woman who kept hacking. He wanted to glance through a magazine but felt like if he did, no amount of scrubbing could get the germs off his fingers. He sighed and as he watched the nurses go about their business, he amused himself with thinking about just how different being a doctor really was from what was depicted on TV. If someone wanted to see drama, he figured they'd do just as well to film his life with the way things had been going lately.

Something bumped his shoulder and he looked down to see J.D.'s head. The teen had somehow managed to fall asleep and was slumped so precariously in his chair that Eric scooted as close as he could to provide a better pillow. He couldn't help but be a little jealous of the precious sleep the boy was stealing on his shoulder, but he smiled at their closeness all the same.

Eric and J.D. didn't leave the ER until it was nearly six. The sun was peeking over the horizon on the drive home and J.D. studied it, knowing what expression would be on Eric's face if he looked to the side. The doctor had cut off his temporary cast and cleaned the wounds, which hadn't been pleasant in the least. She explained that they did the right thing to come in, for the pins keeping the holes open meant that the bacterial infection could've spread straight to his bones and blood. She gave the teen a high dose of antibiotics and some anti-inflammatory durgs and was hesitant about letting him go home without admitting him, but did under the instruction that he be supervised.

When Eric had asked how such damage could occur, the physician listed off a number of suggestions, one of the first of which being blunt trauma to the wound. That had given Eric the sour expression that he still wore, and J.D. knew it was because if his father had never yanked on his arm, he wouldn't have had to wake up his foster parents in the middle of the night and deprive Eric of a good night's rest. It was now Friday, too which meant it was game day. Eric was going to be a wreck.

"I'm really sorry about all this," J.D. said quietly, forcing himself to look away from the sun and back over to his foster father.

Eric shook his head but didn't break his concentration on the road. "You don't need to apologize. You just need to get better. I want you to get lots of rest today."

"Yeah, but, you have a game tonight."

Eric nodded.

"And now I've completely screwed you up –"

"Hey," Eric said softly. "No one's screwed anything up. The only people who have screwed something up is your father for causing this and me for grabbing your arm to wake you up. Now I'm real sorry about that. I completely forgot you were injured."

J.D. could hardly remember the coach doing such a thing but then again, his memories from early that morning were a bit jumbled with the haze of fever. "I'm fine. It was an accident."

"It never should've happened. I've gotta be more careful. I wasn't paying attention." He looked over at the teen. "I'm sorry."

J.D. nodded and wanted to reassure him that he was fine, but didn't want to sound like a sycophant. He adjusted his arm, which was re-bandaged in another temporary cast, in the sling the hospital had given him, and was relieved when it didn't throb as much when he moved it. Once back at the house, both went to their beds and plopped down. Eric knew it was pointless to even try to sleep in the hour he had before his eldest daughter and wife got up, but he closed his eyes and willed himself to doze all the same.

"How'd it go?" Tami quietly asked.

Eric smirked. He should've known she wouldn't have really been sound asleep. "Fine. It was fine. They cleaned him up and gave him some IV antibiotics and fluids. We just have to watch him for a few days."

Tami rolled over and snaked a hand across his chest, snuggling up against his warmth. "Thank you for taking him."

Eric sighed. "You're welcome."

"He's gonna be all right?"

"He's gonna be just fine."

"Good," she murmured, half-asleep. Eric had just closed his eyes and begun to relax when Gracie Bell started fussing. He tried not to groan.

Tami had to avoid two stumbling male zombies that morning, for Eric had hardly gotten any sleep and J.D. had to get up for his therapy appointment at nine. She knew her husband didn't mind playing Mr. Mom, but she also knew that he deserved a massage and to sleep in on Saturday morning for all he was doing. She headed into work and called Eric at lunch to see how the therapy appointment had gone, but he didn't seem to know much since he spent the whole time in the waiting room with Gracie while J.D. was inside. All J.D. had said was that the therapist mostly wanted to introduce himself.

There was a rally in the gym that afternoon and as the cheerleaders performed a routine, Tami clapped along and enjoyed herself. She tried to make a clean escape to get home in time to swap babysitting duty with Eric as quickly as possible, but Buddy Garrity waylaid her on her walk to her car in the parking lot.

"Hey, Tami!" he called as he jogged over with a smile. She returned the smile out of politeness but couldn't help but wonder how many times he expected her to believe that he "just happened" to bump into her on her way out.

"Hey, Buddy. What's going on? You know, I'm in a bit of a rush right now."

"That's all right," Buddy huffed, resting a hand on the hood of her car to brace himself. "I just wanna know something. Is it true that you and Eric have taken in McCoy?"

A thin line formed between her brows. "J.D.? Yes, we have. Why, what's this about?"

"I just wanted to let you know that I think that's excellent," he said as he waved a hand. "I couldn't imagine two better people."

Tami nodded, knowing Buddy well enough to know that he hadn't stalked her to give her a compliment. "Thank you. We're doing out best."

"How's he doing?"

"Had to go to the ER last night, actually."

Buddy's beady eyes got larger. "Really?"

"Yeah, his arm got infected but he should be fine."

"Oh, thank heavens. Lord knows what the Panthers would do without that boy. Now, I know Eric has high hopes for Vince, but the truth is, the kid just doesn't have what it takes and –"

"Whoa, whoa, wait a minute, slow down," Tami said, resting a hand on her hip. "I don't think you understand the situation. J.D.'s not coming back this season."

Buddy blinked. "Well, sure I know he needs his recovery time but he's gotta be chomping at the bit to get back into the game," he said with a chuckle. "How long's it take to heal a few broken ribs?"

Tami just stared. "A long time. A long time and there ain't no way I'm letting him go back out on that field to get run over by a bunch of teenage freight trains until I know he's at 100%."

"Now, Tami, that really ain't your decision, is it?"

She rested the other hand on her hip. "Excuse me?"

"Well, I mean, this situation, this living situation is just temporary. I know it's the Christian thing to do and all, but that boy belongs with his father. And I know Joe will feel differently about J.D. getting back in the game."

Tami's lips were tight as the breeze tousled her hair. "Joe will feel differently?"

Buddy nodded. "I spoke to him just this morning." He began to tick off points on his thick fingers. "He's taking anger management classes, his lawyers are putting together a case to prove that he's responsible, and listen, Tami, we know he didn't attack that boy."

Tami rolled her eyes and unlocked her door.

"I'm serious now. He's got an alibi. He swears he didn't do it and he passed the lie detector test. What more do you want?"

Tami opened the door and gave him an incredulous look. "He has an alibi now, does he?"

Buddy nodded. "I talked to him on the phone that night around ten, which is after J.D. was attacked. If Joe had done it, I would've been able to detect the lie in his voice. He would've sounded like he was guilty. I'm real good at that sort of thing."

"All right, first of all, Buddy, that's not an alibi," Tami said, turning to face him once again. "And second of all, you're a sweet man, Buddy Garrity, but you're also a very trusting man. Now, I understand your concern for the Panthers and I know that Joe's your friend, but people aren't always what they seem."

Buddy sighed. "Just hear me out. Let me come talk to the boy. Remind him of what he's missing and –"

"No. You know how awful that'll make him feel?"

"I'm not trying to make anyone feel bad. I just wanna gage the fire in his eyes for myself, you know? That way I can get an estimate for how soon he'll be ready to play again."

Tami set her purse in her car and looked Buddy in the eye. "Buddy, I'm only gonna say this once and I'd appreciate it if you didn't share it with anyone else. You got that?"

Buddy nodded, his enthusiastic smile fading.

"There is no fire in that boy's eyes. There is fear and guilt and dejection. He hides in the closet when he's home alone because he's so scared. He woke us up last night because of a nightmare. He has half starved himself to death because eating makes him feel sick and feeling sick reminds him of when his stomach with filling with his own blood because his father – your buddy Joe – beat him with a golf club, broke a glass in his face, and kicked him until he popped a lung. He almost died, Buddy, and he has to live with that every day. Every God-damn day. And to make it worse, his father keeps showing up and making threats to my family. So I think it's time you re-think your priorities."

She ducked into the car and slammed the door shut. Buddy stood there speechless as Tami drove away.

Tami didn't have the chance to talk to Eric about his day for he was out the door as soon as she came home. Matt was over with Julie and the two were flipping through a magazine at the dining room table. Tami set her stuff down then shook her bangs out of her face. "Hey y'all."

"Hi, Mom."

"Hi, Mrs. Taylor."

Tami furrowed her brow as she glanced around the family room. "Honey, where's Gracie Bell?"

"She's in with J.D."

Tami tried not to stare for too long before she swallowed her surprise and stepped down the hall. J.D.'s door was open and he was holding a toy horse and making it fly with his good hand while Gracie's horse ate the carpet like grass. Tami couldn't help but smile at the sight. "Hey y'all. What's going on?"

Gracie held up her pony, clearly proud that her new friend was playing with her. "'E's eatin'. An' that one floats." She pointed a little finger at J.D.'s pony.

Tami shot him an amused expression. "It has invisible wings," J.D. explained.

"Ah," Tami nodded. "Well, I'll leave you two to it, then." She winked at J.D. before slipping back out, grinning when she heard her daughter imitate a whinny.

Matt and Julie were planning on going to the game, and Tami didn't want to leave J.D. home alone after what had happened the last time, so she told him to bundle up and head out with the rest of them. He seemed reluctant to head into a pit of his classmates, who would be full of stares and questions, but Julie read the look on his face and arched a brow. "C'mon, you can sit between me and Matt. No one will see you."

He smiled shyly at her suggestion and Tami realized that J.D. and her daughter spending more time together would be a good thing for both of them. She'd never seen Julie show such mature compassion for someone other than Gracie, and if she didn't know better, she'd think the girl felt like the two years she had on J.D. entitled her to maternal affection. She was proud of the way her daughter was stepping up to help without a word of encouragement from her mother, which showed just how much she had grown these last few years. Matt was likewise gracious to his former rival, and Tami knew that the issues he faced with his own father helped him relate to the younger teen's struggle. Plus, they had all bonded over naming that dog in the movie "Landry."

Tami was pretty sure she embarrassed J.D. in the car when she glanced at him in the rearview mirror and reminded him in front of the other teens that she'd take him home early if he started feeling unwell. His cheeks flushed and he mumbled an "okay." Gracie seemed to have decided that he was her new best friend, for she even brought her toy horses in the car and asked him to play while they drove.

The brisk autumn evening greeted them as they got out of the car and they all put their hoods up. It looked like it could rain at any minute, the dark clouds making the evening come even swifter with their shadows. They found a seat on the bleachers and Tami brought along some books in a bag to keep Gracie occupied.

J.D.'s fears came true nearly as soon as he sat down, for even with a beanie on and his hood up, he couldn't hide the dark bruise on his face, and soon heads were swiveling to steal a glance at him. Matt noticed right away and stood with his hands on his hips, pretending to survey the field while intentionally blocking J.D. from view. Julie sat down beside her foster brother and slipped her arm around his with an exaggerated shiver. "Seriously, these benches are freezing."

"Y'all wanna blanket to sit on?" Tami asked from her seat behind them. "I've got one in the back of the car."

"My butt will warm it up," Julie replied then looked to J.D. who was pulling his arm out of his sling. He disentangled himself from the girl to stuff the sling inside his sweatshirt and when Matt realized that he was trying to hide his sling underneath, he helped him pull his arm out of his sleeve and tuck it back in the sling, safely hidden. "Probably warmer under there, anyway," Julie said as she took his arm again.

Matt sighed and sat down beside him, his voice low. "I don't know what all these people are staring at. I mean, I'm not that ugly."

J.D. smiled a little and Julie giggled. "Actually, Matt, I hate to break it to you, but yes, you are that ugly."

"Jeez, thanks for the support," he mumbled as he tucked his hands into the pocket of his hoodie.

J.D. noticed that fewer people were looking now, and that having them sit so close beside him was making him warm. "Thanks, you guys."

"No problem. Hey, you ever seen a –"

"Well, well, well," came a deep voice from behind, and all three turned to spy Tim Riggins sauntering over. "Fancy meeting you here."

"Hey," Matt said with a laugh, getting up to greet his former teammate. "Look who's sober."

"Har har." Riggins inclined his head to Tami and Gracie. "Mrs. Taylor. Little Taylor."

Tami smiled. "Hey y'all. How're you?"

"Good. I'm good. Mind if I have a seat?"

Tami shook her head. "Not at all."

Riggins sat down beside Matt and leaned over to see J.D. who was half hidden under his hood. "Hey, Obi-Wan Kenobi, you trying to steal Matt's girlfriend or what?"

"Shut up, Tim," Julie quipped, rolling her eyes.

Tim smiled, amusement dancing in his eyes. "Oh? You two just look pretty cozy all snuggled up over there."

"I'm cold," Julie said, knowing that Tim was embarrassing J.D. "You can snuggle with Matt if you want."

Riggins raised his brows. "Oh really?"

"C'mon, baby," Matt muttered, wrapping his arm around the other teens'. Riggins pretended to snuggle and rested his head on Matt's shoulder, making J.D. and Julie laugh. Tami pulled out a book for Gracie and was grateful for the boys' antics, for she hadn't heard J.D. laugh in some time, and just one look at his face told her that he idolized Tim. She returned her attention to the field, trying to see through the crowd that was now filing into the stands.

Her phone vibrated in her pocket and she pulled it out to find a text from Eric, asking if J.D. was there with her. She replied that he was, and when Eric texted her back, she felt a chill run down her spine. His response was just two words, but those two words were enough to make a flame flicker in her heart: "Joe's here."

**Please share your thoughts! :)**


	17. Spoiled

**Thank you so much for the reviews for the previous chapter! They always help me gauge what readers want more of. :)**

**BROKEN WINGS**

**CHAPTER 17: SPOILED**

Tami immediately scanned the surrounding crowd, hunting for Joe McCoy's lean figure. Her heart beat out a fierce tempo as she studied the Panthers' stands around her, only to discover with some relief that Joe was nowhere to be seen. Shifting her gaze down to the sidelines, she looked for the man then spied him on the other side of the field where the opposing team's fans were gathering. The fact that he was across the field meant he was trying to comply with his restraining order, and if he was complying with the restraining order, he knew J.D. was there. Tami looked to the teens in front of her and was relieved that none of them seemed to have noticed Joe on the other side of the field. She texted Eric back, saying, "I see him."

Across the field, Joe McCoy stood with his hands in his coat pockets. He'd opted out of wearing any Panther memorabilia to avoid drawing the attention of the visitors' fans. He could barely make out the shape of his son in the distance, but knowing he was there put him on edge.

"Hey, Joe," came a voice from behind and Joe turned around to see Buddy Garrity strolling up, an umbrella tucked under his arm.

Joe smiled. "Buddy. What brings you to this side of the field?" He tried not to let Buddy's lack of a smile get to him.

"Listen, can we talk in private?"

"The game's about to start."

"I know, but this will only take a minute." Buddy gestured to a patch of grass behind the stands and Joe sighed and followed him. The lawn was wet from the last rain and he didn't like the idea of getting his shoes damp, but Buddy was a bigger gossip than anyone he knew and if he could keep Buddy on his side, he'd keep the rest of the boosters on his side, as well.

"How can I help you?" he asked once they were out of earshot of the rest of the fans.

"Now, hear me out," Buddy said, holding out a hand. "I spoke with Tami Taylor today and she sure is convinced that you're the one who beat that boy. I still don't know what to believe, Joe, so can you look me in the eye and tell me you're innocent?"

Joe sighed through his nose, shaking his head a little as he studied the water stains on his shoes, then looked Buddy in the eye. "I swear to you that I am innocent, Buddy."

Buddy smiled a little then. "Good. That's what I like to hear."

"Listen," Joe said, speaking so lowly that Buddy had to lean over to hear. "This thing between the Taylors and me... it goes way back. The fact of the matter is that Eric has always known that Wade is a better coach than him. Months ago, I made the mistake of recommending to the school board that Wade replace Eric the following year."

If Buddy wore pearls, he'd be clutching them.

"Fortunately, they didn't agree with me," Joe continued, raising his brows. "It was a selfish request, I'll be the first to admit that. But ever since then, the Taylors have acted like I'm some bully trying to force Eric out if his livelihood. I've tried to apologize but they're too damn proud to hear any of it."

"But it's more than that, Joe," Buddy hissed. "Both Eric and Tami saw you hit that boy last year. They –"

"I lost my temper. He was mouthing off and I lost my temper. Lord knows, there was a day when it was all right to discipline your kid, but now with all these Liberals... Look, the point is, that was a personal matter. A family matter. You understand that, right?"

Buddy hesitated but nodded. "I suppose so."

"I was wrong. I'm not a perfect man. I've made mistakes. But the important thing is that I've learned from them. And hey – people change. I would never do something like that again, and I wish it had never happened, because that phone call the Taylors made ruined my life. Our family was over it. The whole incident was something we were laughing about by the end of the weekend. But then the Taylors went and butted in and CPS put so much God damn pressure on us that my wife couldn't handle it anymore." He looked away, biting his lower lip.

"I'm sorry about that, Joe," Buddy said. "But the law's the law. We can't do anything to change that now, but what we can do, is prove that you're a better person now than you were."

Joe nodded. "Yeah but Buddy... I wasn't allowed to visit him at the hospital after the attack. I couldn't comfort my own son. Do you have any idea how awful that is? And while CPS was busy denying me, they allowed Tami Taylor, basically a stranger, to go talk to him. She turned him against me and filled his head with all these ideas about me... She must've made some deal with him because he told the police I was the one who attacked him. Can you believe that?"

Buddy shook his head and tried to ignore the roar of trumpets as the marching band came out onto the field. "That doesn't make any sense, Joe. All she'd be getting out of taking in J.D. is another mouth to feed."

"And a knife through my heart." Joe took in a deep breath through his nose and let it out slowly. "The Taylors took my suggestion to the school board as a direct attack to their family. Now they're attacking mine. J.D. and I have had our differences lately – what father and son don't? He's been acting out lately. Getting drunk at parties, ignoring his homework, sneaking out in the middle of the night. He just doesn't know what's good for him and is testing me. He's using this as an opportunity to spite me by lying to the police and staying with the Taylors who he knows hate me. And it hurts. It really hurts."

Buddy ran a hand through his hair, watching the band in the distance. "Then if it wasn't you, who did it?"

"I already told you," Joe sighed. "It was gangbangers. They tailed him that night and followed him home. I only wish I had heard something... I could've shot the sons of bitches."

"All right," Buddy said, shifting his weight as the band cleared off the field. "Let me try talking to Tami again and see if she can get J.D. to drop the charges."

Joe nodded. "I'd appreciate that. But please, don't tell her you spoke with me. She'd get irrational. You know how women are."

Buddy looked longingly at the field as the players jogged on to the roar of the crowd.

"Buddy?" Joe said, resting a hand on the larger man's shoulder. "Thank you. You're a good friend, and a good man. I'm so blessed to have you."

Buddy smiled and chuckled as he headed over towards the field again. Joe watched him go with a smirk of another sort.

* * *

The game was nearly impossible to call until the end when the Panthers won, to the great relief of J.D., for had they lost he would've been convinced it was his fault for making the coach get up so early that morning to take him to the ER. He felt like a penguin when the whistle blew and everyone around him leapt up and broke into cheers and applause, for with only one hand, he couldn't exactly clap.

"Hey," Riggins said after the noise had died down and fans began to trickle out of the stands. "Saracen, come check out the new decoration on my truck."

Matt tugged Julie up with him as he followed Riggins down the row of benches. "We'll be right back," Julie called to her mom.

"All right," Tami said, gathering up the books Gracie had been looking at. "J.D., you can go with them, know."

He twisted around to help her put the books away, and Tami was glad that his back was now to the field, for Joe McCoy was crossing it. "It's okay. They all know each other better than I do."

"Well, honey, the only way you're gonna get to know each other better is to hang out."

"Yeah..." He smiled a little, distracted by Gracie who was making her toy pony zoom towards his face chanting "Neigh, neigh, neigh!"

Julie's hand was entwined with Matt's and she leaned against him in the cold as they followed Riggins to his truck out in the parking lot. He led them to the back and pointed at the rear bumper with a mischievous smirk.

"Oh, Jesus," Matt said, immediately averting his gaze.

Julie let out an incredulous laugh. "Are you serious? Like, for real?"

There, hanging from the trailer hitch, was a metal ball sack.

"Wow, Tim." Julie said, nodding her mock approval. "Just... wow."

"Y'all like it?" Riggins asked with a smirk.

"Yeah," Julie said. "Classy. Very classy."

"Jesus, man," Matt said, still hardly able to look. "That's disgusting."

Riggins chuckled. "It's supposed to be funny."

"Yeah, funny 'cuz it's gross," Matt continued. "I mean, you're just asking for compensation jokes."

"That's the point. You know?" Riggins said. "Big, loud truck. It's a joke."

"Tim Riggins," Julie said, slowly shaking her head as she appraised him. "I never thought you one to ironically subvert a stereotype."

Tim blinked. "I what?"

Both Matt and Julie laughed, but their laughter was cut short by a voice from behind that called out Julie's name. All three turned to spy Joe McCoy sauntering over. "You've got to be kidding me," Riggins muttered under his breath.

Julie cleared her throat and fought the urge to hide behind Matt as the tall man approached with his sickeningly false smile. "Great game, huh?" he asked once he was within earshot. "Be sure to tell your dad that his offense is top notch."

Julie nodded. "Okay."

Joe came to a stop a few feet from the teens, his smile fading as all three stared him down. "You kids enjoy yourselves?"

Matt shrugged. "It was all right."

"What the hell do you want?" Riggins all but spat and ignored Matt's warning glance.

Joe furrowed his brow. "You two were Panther stars. I value your opinions."

Riggins furrowed his brow and took a step past the young couple. "Since when?"

Joe leaned his head back a little as Riggins approached. "I'm sorry, am I missing something?"

"Yeah," Riggins drawled. "The part where you rot in jail for beating the shit out of your own kid."

"Tim," Julie called, but Riggins ignored her.

"Look, I don't know what my son has told you," Joe said, "but I assure you that I am innocent. J.D. is spoiled. He's used to getting attention for football and now that he's not the star quarterback, he's milking this situation for all it's worth. If I were you, I wouldn't give him the time of day. It's what he wants."

"C'mon, you guys, let's just go," Matt said.

Riggins studied the older man through narrowed eyes. "You really think I'm that stupid?" Riggins asked Joe. "You really think I'm dumb enough to believe all your bullshit?"

Joe chuckled. "How's life as a college drop out, Tim?"

Julie yelled when she saw Riggins' arm pull back, but it was too late. He socked Joe in the face, making the older man stagger backwards. Riggins yowled and cradled his hand and Matt let go of Julie to scurry between the two. "Hey, hey, that's enough."

"You little punk," Joe spat, holding a hand to his cheek. "You'll pay for that."

"Yeah, how's it feel to pick on someone your own size, you son of a bitch," Tim growled as he stalked toward Joe again, only to have Matt wrestle him back.

"Hey, c'mon, c'mon, it's over," Matt said then looked at Joe over his shoulder. "Just walk away, man."

Julie was standing off to the side, her arms wrapped around herself, and nearly shivered when Joe locked eyes with her. "Trash is as trash does," he said then straightened and shot Riggins one last loathing look before sauntering over to his suburban.

Matt didn't let go of Riggins until Joe was in his car and driving away, and when he did, Riggins yanked away and adjusted his coat. "Arrogant bastard."

"That was really, really stupid," Julie scolded, and when Matt and Riggins looked back to her, they saw that she had tears in her eyes. "What's wrong with you?" she asked Riggins.

Riggins looked away, his hair curtaining his face for a moment before he swept it back.

"Seriously, man," Matt added. "He's got like, five-hundred lawyers and shit. He'll take you to court."

"Like I've got anything to lose," Riggins said.

"Wake up," Julie said, raising her voice. "He almost killed J.D. and he's gonna get away with it because he's a rich bastard with good lawyers. You think he'd hesitate to kill some kid who lives in a trailer?"

"Hey, whoa," Matt said. "Who said anything about killing?"

"He's a murderer," Julie said. "He's capable of it. You know he is."

Riggins sighed and pulled out his keys. "You watch too much TV."

"C'mon," Matt said, wrapping an arm around her shoulder. "Let's just... go home."

"Yeah, seeya," Riggins said as he set one foot in the car. He peered over the roof at Julie as she and Matt started to walk away. "Hey, Julie. I'm sorry."

Julie nodded then continued on her way with Matt.

* * *

The fact that her daughter had recently been crying didn't escape Tami's attention as she and Matt met her at the car, but she chose not to ask her about it in front of the others, worried the two had gotten into a fight. The drive home was relatively quiet except for J.D. and Gracie continuing their pony game from earlier, and Tami couldn't help but notice that J.D. sounded just as into the game as Gracie did.

Once back at the house, Julie and Matt slipped off to her room while Gracie threw a tantrum because she had to go change into her pajamas which meant stopping the pony game. In the end, she quieted when J.D. followed her into her room to keep her company while she changed. Gracie smiled smugly and Tami couldn't help but laugh. "Why J.D., I don't believe I've ever seen her so smitten."

"Our ponies are having a pretty epic adventure," he explained while he perused all the baby stuff in Gracie's room.

"Is that so? I thought I heard something about a wolf?"

"Yeah, a wolf keeps coming and trying to eat them, but they keep tricking him," he said, looking at a diaper. "How're these comfortable?"

"They're not, I don't think. Which is why we're lucky that our Gracie Bell is a big girl now and only needs to use them at night, isn't that right?" Tami asked Gracie, who slapped at her hands as she tugged up her pajama pants, as if her momma was embarrassing her.

"But she's so little," J.D. said.

"She's almost three. Girls usually potty train before boys."

"Why?"

"Anatomy." She tugged on Gracie's pajama top and gently pulled her hair out of the collar.

"'E play now?" Gracie asked.

"All right, but only for a few more minutes. It's almost bed time, y'all."

"Yay!" Gracie hopped about then grabbed J.D. by the hand that wasn't hidden under his sweatshirt and yanked him down the hall.

Tami chuckled and called out a "thank you" after him before popping into the shower. When she got out, she found that Eric had come home and made a fire, and that J.D. and Gracie playing beside it, though their ponies were moving in slow motion now and they both looked about ready to collapse. She snatched Gracie up for bed and warned J.D. to have a snack and take his pills before he passed out, so he forced himself up and into the kitchen.

Eric stepped in from the patio, having been on the phone, and the tightness of his expression betrayed that the conversation hadn't been a pleasant one. J.D. knew that the polite thing to do would be to ask his foster father what was troubling him, but the truth was that his tense expression made him nervous. When the coach saw the kid trying to make a PB&J with one hand, however, he stepped over with a "Here, let me help you with that."

"Thanks." J.D. sat down on one of the stools by the island and watched Eric make him a sandwich with much more passion than was necessary.

When he was done, he handed him the plate with a quiet, "There you go," then headed off down the hall. J.D. watched him until he disappeared then took a tentative bite of his sandwich.

Eric found Tami slipping out of Gracie's room and after she had eased the door shut, he beckoned her into their bedroom. "Great game, hun. You must be proud," she said, giving him a kiss.

"Yeah, well I just got a long voicemail from one of Joe McCoy's lawyers."

Tami's happy expression disappeared. "You're kidding."

"Nope," he said, his voice tight. "Said we ought to find ourselves representation because once he's been cleared of all charges, he's going to fight us for custody of J.D."

Tami shook her head. "Well, 'clear of all charges.' He ain't gonna get clear of all charges."

"He might. You know he might."

"Hey Mom?" came Julie's soft voice as she peeked in. "Can I talk to you for a sec?"

Tami shook her bangs out of her eyes as she face her. "Sure, honey. Where'd Matt go?"

"He went home."

Eric gestured for his daughter to come in and gave her a hug when she did so. "What's wrong? You look upset."

Julie hugged him back but her brave face was quickly falling away.

**Please share your thoughts!**


	18. Gracie Belle's Cafe

**BROKEN WINGS**

**CHAPTER 18: GRACIE BELLE'S CAFE**

When Eric and Tami came out to the family room after listening to Julie tell the story of how Tim Riggins punched Joe McCoy, they found J.D. asleep on the couch cushion closest to the fire. Tami made a move to wake the boy but Eric stopped her with a hand on her arm and a shake of his head. Grabbing a blanket, he draped it over the teen who was so deeply asleep that he didn't even stir from the touch. Eric glanced to the clock and saw that it was still a half hour till midnight. "I'm gonna call Tim," he whispered and Tami nodded.

Eric stepped down the hall to make the call from their bedroom, and Tami's eyes became unfocused as she watched J.D. sleep, her mind churning with Julie's story and the voicemail from McCoy's lawyer. She toyed with the ends of her hair as she tried to get a handle on Joe and his motives. The man was hurt and bitter and she wasn't surprised that he'd followed through on his threat to legally battle her family. He might not be suing like he claimed he would, but then again, he had no grounds. But why he had acted friendly to a group of teens that night was beyond her. Maybe he was trying to remain in some good graces, or maybe he was testing loyalties. Either way, she knew that he'd targeted Matt and Riggins because her daughter had been present, which meant that what had probably gone down was an intimidation attempt gone wrong on his part.

The mental image of Tim Riggins socking Joe McCoy in his arrogant kisser was enough to make her smirk, despite her anxiety over how he was going to retaliate. Then again, the man already had a divorce, attempted murder charges, and now a potential custody battle to contend with. She couldn't imagine even a man of his influence taking on yet another legal issue without going bankrupt.

Sighing, she raised her brows as she heard Eric chuckle down the hall, listening to Tim's version of the story, no doubt. She watched the gentle rise and fall of J.D.'s chest under the blanket and couldn't help but smile over how truly peaceful and snug he looked. The black mark on his face reminded her that security came at a price, and her heart ached at the thought of any child being denied such basic care. The thought that the boy's own father would spend so much time and money trying to deny him the peace he now had was sickening.

Closing the grates of the fireplace as quietly as she could, she kissed her fingertips and pressed them to the top of J.D.'s head before tip toeing down the hall. Eric was just wrapping up his conversation when she slipped inside their room and eased the door shut behind her. "Well?" she asked.

Eric shook his head with a smirk. "He's been icing his knuckles all night."

"Is he all right?"

"Oh, he's fine, just full of regrets that he didn't do more."

Tami ran her hands through her hair. "I wish he hadn't done that... but at the same time, I wish I'd seen it."

Eric chuckled. "Wouldn't that've been something?"

"Baby," Tami said as she pulled back the covers on her side of the bed. "Please don't encourage him."

"Oh, I won't. But what's done is done. J.D. doesn't know, does he?"

She shook her head with a yawn. "He'd be so embarrassed."

"Eh." Eric yanked his covers back as well. "He's practically in love with Tim Riggins. He'll swoon when he finds out that Tim was defending his honor."

Tami certainly couldn't deny the worshipful light she saw in J.D.'s eyes when Tim had shown up that evening, and she realized that Riggins was everything J.D. wasn't: independent, confident, free. A true rogue. While J.D. was repressed to the point that he didn't even know how to get angry. "Did J.D. eat anything tonight?"

"Yeah, I made him a sandwich."

"Good. How'd the appointment go this afternoon?" she asked as she snuggled under the covers. "What'd you think of this Dr. Sanchez?"

Eric shrugged as he climbed into bed. "Short, bald, kinda overweight." At her unamused look, he sighed and continued. "I don't know, what do you want me to say? He seemed like a nice guy."

"I'd like to meet him," Tami said after a pause, and when Eric didn't respond, she looked over and saw that his eyes were shut. "Hun?"

"Hmm?" Eric asked without cracking an eye.

"Your lamp is still on."

He sighed and groaned as he forced himself to move enough to switch it off.

Everyone woke up the following morning to the roar of a downpour on the roof. J.D. realized with some embarrassment that he'd spent the night on the couch and got up to shower, hoping that no one had noticed. Then again, someone had draped a blanket on him, so someone had noticed. There was a time that he would've been mortified to have fallen asleep anywhere other than his bed, but thinking about it now, he couldn't figure why. It was composure, he decided as he shaved his face. He'd been taught that any lapse in composure was a lapse in control, and a lapse in control was a sign of weakness that others would exploit. But sometimes, falling asleep was just that: falling asleep.

By the time Eric finally budged in the morning, Tami, Gracie Belle and J.D. were all already having breakfast. When he caught sight of the pancakes on their plates he shot Tami an amused smile, only to have her give him a "say anything and I'll kill you" look. He chuckled softly as he kissed her head, not blaming her for wanting to stick to a meal she knew J.D. would eat. But at the same time, he wasn't quite ready for his life to become a pancake paradise.

"Why don't I fry up some bacon?" he said as he shuffled into the kitchen.

"Hun, you can do whatever you want."

"I just need some protein."

"Mmm hmmm." She arched a brow as she took a sip of milk.

Eric caught J.D.'s eye and winked at him. Though the teen's elbow was propped on the table, keeping his arm up, and he still looked a little pale, his spirits were doing much better. As the day progressed, Eric began to notice that J.D. no longer slunk around the house like a visitor afraid to touch anything, but rather looked more relaxed and at home. He was glad of the change, for seeing J.D. so silent and apathetic a couple days ago was awful.

Most everyone was content to laze about and watch TV or read while it rained, until the doorbell rang that afternoon. Eric went to answer it and found a redheaded girl peering up at him from under a yellow umbrella with a duck-shaped handle. "Can I help you?"

"Um, yeah, is J.D. here?"

Eric furrowed his brow and shifted his weight. "Yeah, he's here, but why are you?"

"Dad," Julie scolded from behind him as she hurried down the hall. Eric pivoted to face his eldest daughter as she spoke. "Madison, remember?"

Eric's eyebrows shot up. "Oh, yeah, I thought you looked familiar. Y'all come on in." He stepped aside and made room for the girl who followed Julie into the house and stripped off her raincoat and boots. "He's just down the hall," Eric said, stepping into the kitchen.

Julie led the other girl into Gracie's room where the two found J.D. and the toddler taking orders from her stuffed animals at her toy kitchen. Julie's giggle echoed down the hall and as Tami stepped into the kitchen, mouthing "who was that?" Eric smirked with an expression dangerously close to that of a gossip.

J.D. immediately struggled to his feet once he saw Madison enter behind Julie. "Madison. Wha... what are you doing here?"

"He means 'thank you for stopping by,'" Julie said with a slight eye-roll. J.D.'s shoulders hunched a little, which Julie knew by now was a sign of embarrassment from him.

"I heard you were living with Julie," Madison said, slipping her hands into her pockets. "I just... I hadn't heard from you in a while, so I thought I'd just see how you were doing." She pointed towards the door. "I mean, if you want me to go, I can..."

"No, no," J.D. said. "It's fine. I was just surprised, is all."

"Well, I tried to call you but your phone has been off."

"Yeah..." J.D. looked to a toy spatula as he fingered it. "I've been... a little..."

"Hey you," Julie said, distracting both J.D. and Madison as Julie ruffled her little sister's hair. Gracie had run and hid behind Julie once she caught sight of the stranger, and was now peeking out at her with a shy smile. "This is my fried Madison. Can you say Maddie?"

Gracie bit her lip.

Back in the kitchen, Tami and Eric were having a fiercely-paced whisper conversation. "What do you mean 'don't I know who she is'?" Eric hissed.

"That's the girl he used to date," Tami hissed back.

"The one that visited in the hospital?"

"Yes. I thought you would've recognized her."

Eric bit the inside of his cheek as he glanced down the hall. "They all start to look the same after a while."

Tami rolled her eyes.

Back in the toddler's bedroom, Madison grinned. "She's so cute."

Gracie darted from Julie's legs to J.D.'s. "Hey," he said softly. "We have two new customers. Could you show them to their seats?"

Gracie hesitated then nodded with a smile and marched out from behind him to point to two spots on the floor. Julie shot Madison an amused look then tucked her hair behind her ears as she sat down cross-legged. "I've heard the food here is great."

"We have one of the finest chefs in the country," J.D. explained before handing the toy spatula to Gracie and whispering for her to get some plastic food. He cleared his throat before sidling up to the two girls on his knees so that he'd be more level with the cook. He couldn't hide his bemused smile. "Ladies, welcome to Gracie Belle's Cafe. What can I get for you today?" He held out his cast and poised his left hand over it to write down their orders.

"I don't know," Julie said. "What does the chef recommend?"

J.D. looked to Gracie over his shoulder. "Psst. Gracie – what should JuJu eat?"

"A nana."

J.D. nodded and looked back to Julie. "The chef suggests a banana."

Julie pursed her lips and nodded, pretending to consider the suggestion.

In the kitchen, Eric was watching Tami like a hawk. "So is she his girlfriend or not?" he whispered.

"She's just a friend." She paused and glanced about before leaning closer to her husband and whispering some more. "But it's pretty obvious that they still like each other. You know she bought him a stuffed panda bear and gave it to him when he was in the hospital? Well, I've seen that very panda bear tangled up in his blankets. I think he sleeps with it."

Eric furrowed his brow. "A sixteen-year-old boy sleeps with a teddy bear?"

"That's not the point. The point is that he likes her, too, or else he wouldn't be sleeping with it."

"Or he just likes panda bears."

"Oh come on, y'all."

In the bedroom, J.D. was going a little pink when he noticed how cute Madison looked with a broad smile on her face. "And for you, my lady?"

"Um," she said, tucking a strand of dark red hair behind her ear. "Can I have some ice cream?"

"Certainly." J.D. pretended to scribble the order onto his temporary cast. "And to drink?"

"Hey," Julie said. "I never got a drink."

J.D.'s gaze darted to her. "You're not special."

Julie gawked while Madison laughed. "I'll have some water, please."

J.D. nodded and pretended to write it down then waddled over to Gracie on his knees and whispered in her ear. "One banana, one bowl of ice cream, and a glass of water."

Gracie shot him a look as if she was scandalized by the grandiose order.

Tami had turned her back on Eric to start another pot of coffee, and when she turned back around, she found her husband half down the hallway, sneaking towards his daughter's room. "Eric!" she hissed.

He motioned for her to be quiet then took another slow step, his back pressed to the wall. He leaned forward and listened for a moment then deeply furrowed his brow before looking back to Tami. "They're playing restaurant," he whispered.

Tami slowly smiled.

"Just a few moments, ladies," J.D. announced from behind the toy kitchen as he helped Gracie sort through her plastic food to find a bowl and the scoops of ice cream to put in it. Once he assembled it all, he handed it to Gracie, only to have her pretend to salt and pepper the scoops then pour them into a pot on the pretend stove. J.D. looked to the girls as Gracie made cooking noises. "As you can see, your ice cream will be served in the traditional fried style that gives it that Cajun kick."

"Mmm," Madison said. "I can't wait. I'm getting so hungry." She patted at her stomach.

"Me, too," Julie chimed in.

Gracie shot them both a calculated look then stirred the ice cream a bit more, and J.D. couldn't help but grin at the way the little girl's nose was in the air. He couldn't quite tell if she was playing the part or if she was actually offended by their indirect suggestions that she was taking too long. At last, she was satisfied, and handed each scoop of ice cream back to J.D. with a courteous "here you go."

"Thank you." He placed the plastic balls into a bowl then handed Gracie the banana. "Go give it to JuJu," he whispered and Gracie nodded. Chef and server exited the kitchen at the same time and while one unceremoniously shoved a plastic banana into a customer's face, the other balanced a bowl of ice cream and a cup with one hand before handing them off to a grateful patron.

Julie pretended to eat her banana while Madison mimed eating her ice cream. "You know," she said, making her voice sound like she had a mouthful. "I've never tasted vanilla ice cream with breading like this before. Is that garbanzo I'm tasting?"

J.D. shook his head as he scooted away, his voice level. "No, you're out of your mind. That's plastic."

Madison threw her ball of vanilla ice cream at him and all three women laughed when it bounced off his head with an audible pop.

Tami was now at Eric's side as they both strained to listen in on what the teens were doing. She furrowed her brow and looked to Eric at the sound of the plastic ice cream scoop hitting J.D. Eric looked just as confused.

"JuJu," Gracie said, tugging on Julie's sleeve. "I yant REAL ice ceam."

"Yeah?" Julie asked. "We'll have to ask Mommy."

"Right now?"

"I could go for some," Madison chimed in.

"All right." Julie got to her feet and took her little sister's hand before leading the troupe out into the hall.

Tami and Eric were caught between a rock and a hard place. They hardly had a minute to react before the teens saw them, and in that split second, Tami threw herself across the hall and smacked the wall.

Julie stopped dead in her tracks at the odd sight. "Mom?"

Tami smiled. "Just killing a spider."

Julie's jaw dropped. "You killed it? You could've just let it go outside."

Tami slowly shook her head, her eyes wide as she thought up an explanation. "Honey... it would've drowned in that rain. It's like the flood out there."

Julie sighed and the thought of the spider's tragic death was enough of a distraction from finding her parents clustered outside Gracie's door to avoid suspicion. She led the toddler and the other two teens into the kitchen then shouted back down the hall. "Can we have some ice cream?"

"If J.D. eats some," Tami called back without thinking then winced, realizing she probably just embarrassed him.

"Why does J.D. have to eat some?" Madison asked as Julie grabbed a carton of cookie dough while J.D. sat down on a stool by the island.

"Because he's skin and bones," Julie said. "He needs to fatten up."

"Oh my God," Madison said, looking at J.D. with pity. "Don't you see what's going on here?"

J.D. shifted a little, glancing at Gracie as she pushed a chair from the table over to the island. "What?"

Madison shook her head. "They're fattening you up to eat you. Like Baba Yaga."

J.D. smiled a little crookedly while Julie shuddered. "Don't even say her name," she said.

"What? Baba Yaga?"  
"Yeah, it's creepy."

J.D. reached out his good hand to Gracie, and the little girl took it to help her climb up onto the chair, the back of which was against the island.

"She's not that creepy," Madison said, helping Julie set out bowls.

"Who is she?" J.D. asked.

"This creepy old Russian lady," Julie said. "She lives in the sticks on this house built on two chicken feet, and she eats kids."

J.D. leaned back a little. Madison waggled her eyebrows at him. "I like her."

"You like her?" Julie asked, pausing in mid-scoop and earning a grunt from her little sister.

"Yeah, she's so evil and so not what you'd expect an old woman to be."

Julie shook her head. "I thought you said you had a little sister."

"I do," Madison said. "And I get in trouble for giving her nightmares."

Julie chuckled. "You are so mean."

"I say when," Gracie announced when she saw that Julie was scooping into her Blue's Clues bowl. "Mowre, mowre, mowre, stop!"

Julie grabbed a spoon and handed Gracie her bowl, and J.D. was impressed by the toddler's willpower. If he'd ever been given the power to dictate how much dessert he got when he was little, he would've just taken the whole ice cream carton.

Once all the teens had their bowls, Julie snatched J.D.'s away from him and hid in the corner of the kitchen for a moment and when she gave it back, it was doused in chocolate syrup. "Here," she said. "Fatten up. Fatty."

Back in the hallway, Eric and Tami had resumed their unobtrusive observations by the bathroom. "Seriously?" Eric whispered. "Pancakes for breakfast and ice cream sundaes for lunch? I hope you understand this kid wasn't allowed near a grain of sugar while he was with his dad. We're gonna give him the sugar diabetes."

"Hey, so long as he's eating, I'm happy." Tami observed. "And besides, ice cream's got calcium and calcium helps rebuild strong bones."

"You've got a point there."

Tami smirked, watching the teens. There was an obvious divide, with Julie and Madison on one side of the island and J.D. and Gracie Belle on the other. But Madison was diagonal to J.D., and the two looked to each other first whenever they'd smile or laugh. It was enough to make Tami bite her thumbnail at the innocence of their obvious interest in each other.

Madison stayed for another hour or so in which the four played a few more rounds of restaurant, in which the new game became J.D. fumbling the food each time just as he was about to serve the two ladies. Gracie's belly laughter rang out in the house, making Tami and Eric smile as they snuggled up on the couch. When J.D. walked Madison to the door, she hugged him tightly for the span of several deep breaths, and J.D. was tempted to rest his head on her shoulder but stopped himself. She stepped back out into the rain with her yellow ducky umbrella, a quiet "Bye," and a smile.

Tami watched the boy all but trudge back into his room after lingering in the doorway for a few minutes after the door had shut. Confusion was etched into his stance as he slipped out of sight, and for the first time that day, Tami grew worried about him. She had thought the kids were all getting along just fine, and hadn't observed anything more between J.D. and Madison than stolen glances. But she was struck with the thought of how fragile J.D. was at the moment, and how any little rock, like a kiss or a harsh word from a girl he liked, could tip him back off the edge.

He was hardly ready to eat three meals a day, much less be in a relationship, and she hoped that she wasn't going to have to stop the two from seeing each other. _Don't get ahead of yourself, Tami_. She sighed as she pan fried burgers, for neither she nor Eric had wanted to venture out in the rain to buy a new meal. _Don't get ahead of yourself_. But how could she not? So many horrible things had happened to her foster son that she couldn't help but prepare for the worst and hope for the best. It wasn't that she was trying to be a pessimist, but that she was trying to be the best equipped mother that she could be.

Gracie was sitting on the couch, zoned out while watching _Dora the Explorer,_ and Tami realized that not only did the little toot skip her afternoon nap, but she'd been playing all afternoon. The toddler was going to sleep like a rock, which was just fine by her.

The cartoon was interrupted by a beeping sound and a red line appeared at the bottom of the screen with words. Eric entered the room just then, taking a swig of beer, and Tami nodded her head towards the TV. "Hun, can you read what that says? I can't from here."

Eric stepped forward and watched as the letters rolled past on the screen. "It's a flood warning for south Dillon. Good thing we don't live by the creek."

"Those poor people," she sighed. The roar of the rain always made her a little tense, though she never could pinpoint why. Now knowing that there was a flood warning a few miles away was putting her more on edge, even if she knew the waters would never reach their neighborhood. The phone rang and she jumped a little. Taking a moment to gather her nerves, she answered. "Hello?"

"Hello? Tami?"

"Yes, this is she." She winced and hurried back to the stove to flip a burger when one began to hiss.

"Tami, it's Katie. Katie McCoy."

Tami dropped her spatula into the pan.

**Please share your thoughts! :)**


	19. Anxiety

**Author's Note: I apologize that I haven't updated sooner. My life has been going through so many changes at the moment that I've had anxiety like J.D.! It seems to be passing now, so hopefully I'll be able to write more sooner. :)**

**BROKEN WING**

**CHAPTER 19: ANXIETY**

Eric looked over at the sound of a clatter and realized Tami had just dropped the spatula. He was about to ask her what was wrong when she spoke and answered his question for him. "Katie? Oh my God, honey what's going on?"

Eric felt the beer in his belly grow cold when he realized that Katie McCoy was on the other end of the phone. He hurried to take over the burgers for Tami, but in the second that it took him to do so, a dozen thoughts flew through his head. Was Katie coming home? Would she want to take J.D. back? He would miss the kid. He didn't trust her with him. Was she mad at them? His fingers curled around the spatula as he heard Katie's voice answer Tami through the receiver.

"Tami, I can't tell you how good it is to hear a familiar voice."

Tami stared at Eric for a heartbeat before backing away to give him some room at the stove. "Honey, you've had us all so worried. What's going on? Are you coming home?"

"No, no, I'm still a patient... I... I um..." Katie cleared her throat. "Look, Tami, I just wanted to let you know my side of the story."

Tami furrowed her brow, avoiding the curious glances Eric was shooting over his shoulder. "Y'all called to vindicate yourself, not to talk to your son?"

"Is he there?"

"Of course he's here."

"Oh my God." There was a muffled noise like the other woman was biting back tears. "How's my baby?"

Tami sighed and lowered her voice. "Beautiful. He's been handling everything as it comes with a lot more grace than I could."

Katie was quiet and for a few moments, all Tami could hear was the hiss of burgers frying. "He's a good kid."

"He's a damn sweet boy and I don't know where he gets that from seeing as both you and Joe are so selfish that you've bailed on him."

"Hey," Eric said lowly, reaching for the phone but Tami jerked out of his reach, her voice rising.

"I mean who the hell do you think you are? You don't deserve a son like that if you can't even be there for him when he needs you. And I sure as hell hope you don't think you can waltz back here and buy him a bunch of gifts to make up for what you've done, because what you've done is unforgivable."

"Tami –" Eric futilely cautioned from the stove.

"As far as I'm concerned, you've broken that child just as much as Joe has."

Katie sniffled. "I tried to kill myself."

Tami's intense expression faded. "What?"

"That's why I was institutionalized," Katie gasped through her tears on the other side. "I tried to overdose on my mom's pain medicine."

Tami eased into one of the stools beside the bar. "Oh, honey, that's awful."

"I know it was wrong, but I just... my world was falling apart. Everything I did made it worse. Joe was going to fight me on custody and I knew he'd win because I..." She took a moment to catch her breath. "I've been self-medicating for years. He said they'd say I wasn't a fit parent. He was trying to stop me from divorcing him. He said that if I stayed, everything would be fine, but if I left, I'd never see J.D. again. I thought he meant he'd win custody but..." She sobbed again.

"Oh Katie..." Tami held her hand over her mouth.

"What if he did this to J.D. to teach me a lesson? To get me to come home? I couldn't stand that guilt. I couldn't stand knowing I'd done that to my baby. I felt so helpless so I... I made a stupid decision."

"Well, I'm glad that you can see it was stupid."

"Oh, I know. I know. I've been seeing a lot of counselors here and I'm on anti-depressants. I'm finally able to think again."

"Good. Good. You keep up with that."

"I will. I'm just trying to get better so that I can get my baby back."

Tami sighed. "Katie, I don't know what to say. I had no idea you were going through all of this. Why didn't you say anything?"

"Who would I have talked to? I don't have friends, Tami, I have people who want to be close to money."

Tami arched a brow at her husband, who was watching her like a hawk now that he could no longer hear the other side of the conversation. "You know I would've helped you, hun."

Katie sniffled. "It's in the past now. I'm doing my best to move on. And I am so grateful that you're taking care of my little boy. He hasn't been any trouble, has he? He can stay with you for a while?"

"No. No, he hasn't been any trouble at all. We love having him."

"Good. Thank you so much."

Tami tucked her hair behind her ear. "Do you wanna talk to him?"

There was a pause. "Oh God, yes."

"All right, just a sec." Tami let out a deep breath then covered the receiver and met Eric's gaze. "She wants to talk to J.D."

Eric blinked, his lips pursed. "Do you really think that's such a good idea?"

Tami shrugged. "She has a right to speak to her son."

Eric sighed and turned off the heat to the pan before striding past his wife and down the hall to J.D.'s room. The door was open a crack and he could see J.D. flipping through his History book on the floor. "Hey," Eric said softly, knocking on the doorframe, and J.D. looked up at him. "Your mom's on the phone. She wants to talk to you?"

J.D.'s lips parted and a look of shock crossed his face. "Seriously?"

Eric nodded.

J.D. scrambled to his feet faster than Eric had seen the boy move in a week. He had to step aside as the teen dashed past him and down the hall to the kitchen, skidding to a halt by Tami. Tami offered him a small smile then handed the phone over to the boy. "Thanks," he whispered before holding the speaker to his ear. "Mom?"

"Hi, baby."

J.D.'s face split into a wide grin. "Where are you?"

"I'm still at the hospital, sweetie." Katie paused to sniffle. "I miss you so much."

"I miss you, too. When're you coming home?"

"I'm not sure. I'm in a treatment program and it all depends on how well I respond."

The teen furrowed his brow. "Treatment for what?"

"It's so good to hear your voice, J.D. How're you feeling? Do you like it there?"

J.D. licked his lips. "Yeah, it's great..."

"Are the Taylor's treating you okay?"

"Of course."

Katie let out a sigh. "Baby, I'm so sorry I'm not there with you."

J.D. adjusted the phone on his ear. "Well, you will be when you get back, right?"

"We'll see, honey. If Joe takes the custody battle to court, then –" A male voice interrupted her in the background. "I'm sorry, sweetie, but I have to go. My time's up."

"Wait, why?"

"I'll call again later, okay?"

"But I–"

"I love you, baby."

J.D.'s voice was soft. "I love you, too." He listened for the span of several heartbeats, only to hear his mother hang up. He reluctantly handed the phone back to Tami, who had been standing a few feet away the whole time.

The crestfallen look on his face was enough to tell her that the conversation was less than ideal. She took the receiver with a grimace. "I'm sorry, hun. But it's better than nothing."

"Yeah," he whispered. "It was nice to hear her voice."

"It sounds like she's really trying to get out of there."

J.D. nodded, his eyes downcast.

Eric glanced between the two from his spot over by the stove. "Hey, you wanna help me finish dinner?" He took a sip of his beer as he finished the question.

J.D.'s eyes watched the bottle warily, his shoulders tensing. Eric realized what the kid was looking at and set the beer back down a ways from him.

"I'll help you, hun," Tami said, resting a hand on J.D.'s shoulder as she stepped past him. "Go ahead and watch some TV or something."

J.D. bit the inside of his cheek and nodded before heading back to his room. As soon as he was alone, the scent of the cooking hamburgers made his insides coil. He felt anxiety slick him with fear, making his hands shake. He was suddenly unsure of his room, his bed, his life. Everything was so wrong. He should be at home right now with his parents. He should be worrying about tests in school and getting enough sleep and eating dinner in time to watch TV. He shouldn't be in this strange house with these strange people. How had it come to this?

Living with the Taylors was better than living in a group home, but really, what was he doing there? They weren't his family, they weren't his blood, and Tami and Eric's voices as they conversed over dinner preparation sounded foreign. No, they didn't sound foreign, he realized. They sounded familiar. He only wanted them to sound foreign because he was afraid of them sounding familiar. He was afraid of feeling so comfortable in this house with these people, in this little room. What if he was more comfortable there than he would be at home? What if home stopped feeling like home?

He adjusted his arm in his sling and sat down on his bed, leaning his back against the wall. Life had passed by so quickly. He'd aged so fast, he'd let time slip away without having any control over it. Maybe time would slip away while he was at the Taylors and one morning he would wake up and he'd be healed and have forgotten his parents. The thought made his insides twist, and his chest tightened with panic. The realization that he was afraid but didn't even know what he was afraid of was overwhelming him.

He closed his eyes. He'd felt terrified and helpless so often lately that the sensation was as familiar as it was unwelcomed. He wished he could climb a mental staircase and pull himself out of it. He wished he could follow his thoughts to their root and discover what had triggered his anxiety in the first place. Usually he could do those things to maintain his control, but right now he couldn't, and it was pulling him deeper into the darkness of his own clouded judgment.

Tears might trigger some release, but he couldn't find anything piercing enough to cry over, so instead he just sat there and tried to force his mind to go blank. He tried to quiet all of the whispering voices that scared him and made him feel sick inside. He tried to focus on the good in his life, on the stability of the world around him.

J.D. could hear the door creak open and assumed Tami had stepped in to check on him, but instead of opening his eyes to his foster mother, he found his youngest foster sister. Gracie smiled at him then sat down beside him with a sigh, looking very grown up. J.D. couldn't help but smile at the toddler's affectations modeled after her sister. He studied her for a moment, feeling unsure about being around someone so young when he felt so violently topsy turvy inside, but then Gracie looked up at him. "JayGee play horsees?"

He smiled at her innocent question. "Good idea. Let's play horses."

Gracie grinned and dashed out of the room to get the toy ponies. J.D. was glad for the distraction from his thoughts as Gracie came back in with the toys. They played the same game a few times and the repetitiveness of it was allowing his mind to wander. He watched Gracie's little hand close around the back of her pony, and he noted the way her lips were shiny with saliva as she made enthusiastic galloping sound effects. She was so small and precious and so trusting. Being around her reminded him of how amazing it was to be alive, and usually just watching her go about her little life made him feel more alive himself. Right now, however, he was saddened to realize that even Gracie's baby charm couldn't lift the cold anxiety that had settled over his heart.

Tami soon called the kids to dinner and J.D. obliged, even though he didn't feel like eating. Eric watched him pick at his hamburger patty and salad and shot a look to Tami. "Didn't I tell you that eating ice cream in the middle of the afternoon was gonna spoil his supper?"

"Don't look at me," Tami said, raising her brows. "Julie gave it to him."

"It's not that," J.D. said. He knew the two were joking around but he didn't much feel like being a part of their banter at the moment. "I'm just not that hungry."

Tami nodded and Eric gestured to the teen's plate. "Just eat what you can, son. You need the protein."

"Yeah," J.D. said quietly then took a small bite. Fifteen minutes later, he was pacing in his room, trying to fight back the nausea clawing at his stomach. He'd just started eating regularly again. He couldn't throw up. If he threw up, he'd have an empty stomach, and if he had an empty stomach, he'd feel like he had when he'd tried to disappear and ignore the world. He was tempted to ignore the world again, except for the fact that he'd be left alone with his thoughts terrorizing him. Just then, his stomach churned and he knew there was no use resisting it any longer.

He strode into the bathroom and knelt by the toilet before vomiting what little he'd eaten. He felt so pathetic that he nearly cried as the nausea was relieved and a temporary peace settled in his stomach. "Hun, are you all right?" Tami asked from the doorway.

J.D. looked up at her then flushed the toilet before wiping off his mouth with toilet paper. There was no use hiding anything. He shook his head no.

Tami sighed and crouched beside him, resting a hand on his back. "Why'd you throw up?"

He shook his head, waiting to make sure the nausea had truly passed before sitting up straighter.

"Well, I think I know," Tami continued. "I'll bet it has to do with talking to your mom."

J.D. swallowed then met her gaze. "I need a drink."

She nodded, a line between her brows, then led him out of the bathroom and gave him a glass of water from the kitchen.

"Thank you," he said before drinking, rinsing the aftertaste of bile out of his mouth. Eric was tucking Gracie in and Julie was in the shower, so the two were alone. Once J.D. had finished his water, Tami took his hand and led him over to the couch by the fire where the TV was playing the news on mute. She took a seat and when the boy followed suit, she wrapped an arm around his waist and gently pulled him close. J.D. rested his head on her shoulder, taking in the familiar scent of her soap, sighing as his body relaxed against hers.

"What're you thinking about?" she asked after several long moments of listening to the hiss and snap of the fire.

"That I hate being so scared. That I'm sick of being so scared."

She angled her arm so that she could run her fingers through his curly hair. "Honey, what're you scared of?" For a moment she worried that Julie had told him about the incident with Joe the previous night, but his response reassured her.

"I don't even know. And that's making it worse."

Tami nodded but remained quiet, giving him his space to try to sort out his thoughts.

"I mean... I know I'm afraid it'll be a long time until I see my mom. That I'll never feel like I'm home... not really."

"You're going through a big change. Lots of change."

"And it feels like nothing's steady anymore. Nothing's stable."

"Well, I'm right here, sweetie." She gave him a gentle squeeze. "I'm not going anywhere."

"I know," he whispered. He wanted to add "But you're gone half the day," but didn't.

"When you start feeling scared, maybe you should come spend time with me or Eric or Julie because we all love your company. Maybe you won't feel so lonely."

He nodded, but as kind as the offer was, it only vaguely defrosted the chill inside. He knew he needed to be able to combat the fear on his own, he just didn't know how. "I just sometimes feel like the world is upside-down," he whispered huskily.

"Baby, you just have to trust that everything will be all right. I know that's hard, but time helps everything pass. And what seems insurmountable today will be shrinking into the distance in a few days. Maybe it'll take a few weeks, but look how far you've already come. I'm so proud of you. You have an amazing spirit. And I mean that with all my heart, honey. You inspire me."

"Hiding in closets isn't very inspiring."

"Coming out of the closet is."

Eric had walked into the room right at that moment and froze mid-step, staring at the two. He shot Tami a "what did you just say?" look and she shot him a silencing expression and he slipped back off down the hall before J.D. noticed him.

J.D. sighed and Tami continued to run her fingers through his hair, hoping that her physical presence was helping to soothe him. J.D. was feeling warm and relaxed leaning against her, and after another ten minutes or so of comfortable silence, Tami forced them both to get up lest they fall asleep right then and there. While he didn't feel completely better, J.D. felt some of his anxiety calm, and when he lay down in bed, he hugged the panda bear stuffed animal that Madison had given him.

After making sure that J.D. was okay to be left alone for the night, she headed into her bedroom. Eric was already in his pajamas and was pulling back the covers on his side of the bed, fixing her with a curious stare. Tami groaned and flopped onto the bed without changing. "Tired, huh?" he asked. Her only response was an incoherent groan. Eric glanced around then sat down on the bed beside her and lowered his voice. "When were you planning on telling me that the kid is gay?"

Tami yanked her head up, her hair askew. "Huh?"

"J.D. I'm not saying that I hold it against him or anything, but it would help to know –"

"Babe, what on earth are you talking about?"

Eric blinked. "I overheard you two talking about how inspiring it was that he came out of the closet."

"Eric, I meant literally. He literally came out of the closet. He hasn't hidden in there since that day."

Eric's dark eyes took on a chagrined air. "Oh."

Tami smirked. "Oh?"

He yanked back the sheets, trying not to smile. "Shut up."

Tami laughed.

**Please share your thoughts! :)**


	20. Creativity

**Author's Note: Thank you guys for your well-wishes! I am certainly feeling better now. Not having school in the fall for the first time (I graduated in the spring), boy drama, and getting big news on my career all conspired to make me anxious last week, but I am adjusted now, and I thank you for your support. In fact, the career news is pretty exciting. I'm a screenwriter, as well as a novelist, and my manager thinks we're finally ready to take my first script to the market to see if we can get anyone interested in buying it! :)**

**BROKEN WINGS**

**CHAPTER 20: CREATIVITY**

J.D. woke up on Sunday morning from a fitful night of sleep. He'd had nightmares he couldn't place or explain but they'd left him sweating and confused. As he lay in bed, listening to the rest of the house wake up, he thought about how he had heard his mother's voice just yesterday. She had been terse and had sounded strained, and he wished he'd told her not to worry because he didn't mind that she had never come for him. Well, he did mind, but if not minding anymore would make her come home now, then he would stop minding right away.

While Tami, Eric and Gracie went to church that morning, J.D. and Julie stayed home and worked on assignments. The rain had yet to let up and sitting alone in his room, the gentle roar on the roof began to unsettle the teen. Grabbing his backpack, he padded down the hall to Julie's room and knocked on the door. "Yeah?" she called from the bed.

"Um, do you mind if I work in here?"

"No, not at all," she said, hopping up to open the door for him.

"Thanks. It's just..."

"Creepy quiet?" she asked with an amused expression.

J.D. smiled. "Yeah. It's weird."

"I know. It bothers me, too, so I usually play music." She hopped back onto the bed. "Make yourself at home."

J.D. sat down on the floor at the foot of her bed and leaned against it as he pulled out his World Literature book. After glancing at his assignment, he flipped to the correct page and started reading a short story from South Africa. Julie absentmindedly tapped her pencil as she worked on something, but J.D. was soon able to block out the noise as he read the story. It was about a young boy who was walking miles to buy food for his family, and since he was black in Apartheid South Africa, J.D. knew something bad was going to happen to him.

As the boy in the story bought the pork rinds and began on his long walk home, he was surrounded by a group of white boys. J.D. began to tap his thumb against the page. The white boys had a switch with them, and after spilling the black boy's food, they began to beat him. J.D. felt his heart rate beginning to climb, and when the story began to describe the gashes the boy had on his back from the switch, and how the white boys began throwing rocks and calling him names, he closed the book and tossed it aside. Why anyone would ever write something so awful was beyond him.

"What's wrong?" Julie asked from above, and J.D. realized he'd forgotten she was there.

"Nothing."

"Okaaay," she drawled, obviously not believing him. "Are you thinking about Madison?"

J.D. furrowed his brow and craned his neck to look up at her. "What?"

Julie laughed. "Oh, please. You have to know she's still totally into you."

He straightened again, but instead of finding a wall to stare it, there was a mirror that reflected his puzzled face for Julie's entertainment.

"What?" she asked. "You don't like her?"

"No, I like her. I mean, as a friend."

"She keeps asking when you're coming back to school."

J.D. sighed and yanked his backpack over. He grabbed the World Literature book with his good arm and stuffed it inside. When he looked up at Julie's reflection, her amused expression was gone.

"Hey. If I'd been through what you've been through, I'd get nervous sometimes, too."

"I'm not nervous sometimes," he mumbled. "I'm nervous all the time."

Julie sat up and folded her legs under her. "You seem to have fun with Gracie Bell."

He shrugged.

"Maybe you just need to be around more people your age," Julie suggested. "Going back to school will probably help because it's something normal. It's structured."

"Yeah..." he said quietly. "I feel like I'll never be ready to go back."

"Well, you're still healing. You have to give yourself time. You can't expect to just magically feel normal again."

He locked eyes with her reflection. "What if I never feel normal again?"

Julie sighed then scooted to the edge of the bed to look him in the eye for real. "I don't think you will. But I think that in time, you'll find a new normal. Like, I remember how angry I was when I moved here. I hated it. I just wanted to go back to our old house where everything was 'normal.' But after a while, I made some friends, had some fun, and now Dillon is my new 'normal.' I mean, it feels like home now. Obviously, you've been through something more dramatic than moving, but... I think it'll be okay. Everything will be okay. Just trust in that."

J.D. took in a deep breath and slowly let it out, nodding a little. He envied her conviction and her faith in her own thoughts, and hoped that when he was as old as her, he'd be able to have the same trust in himself. "But... aren't you leaving in a few months?"

Julie sighed. "I guess so."

"Aren't you scared?"

"Not yet, but I probably will be. I mean, college is just school. Or at least, that's what I keep telling myself."

J.D. looked across the hall through the open door to Gracie's room. "I just thought you might not want to go away. I mean, if I had a little sister and a family like this, I wouldn't want to leave them."

"You do."

"What?" He looked back up to her.

"J.D., you do have a family like that. You're part of our family."

The look in her eyes was so earnest that he had to cast his gaze elsewhere and looked down to the carpet, suddenly shy, even as her words warmed him. "I just don't want to be in the way," he said quietly.

"You're not, okay? And besides, I always secretly wanted a brother."

He smiled a little and forgot that she could still see his reaction in the mirror until she giggled.

"Well, I wanted an older brother, but this'll do. You're bigger than me, at least."

"I guess that technically counts as a big brother."

"No way. I'm the one who gets to pick on you."

J.D. smiled again, and a moment later, the house was split with the sounds of Gracie's happy shrieks as the rest of the family got home.

After his conversation with Julie, J.D. felt better and more secure with the insecurity of his life at the moment. She was right, he did have a family now, and while Tami and Eric would never replace his real parents, he was finally beginning to feel that loving them was not only okay, but wonderful. They weren't supposed to be the same as his birth parents, but they were part of his new normal and he decided to welcome the change.

When the power went out that afternoon, he made a fort in the living room with his foster sisters, and Gracie was overjoyed when they were allowed to eat snacks under the sheet, as if they were hidden away on a safari. It was a bit of a let down when the lights came back on that night and their fort didn't seem as magical anymore. Thunder rolled on into the night, and J.D. found it difficult to fall asleep against the distant rumbles. As a result, he awoke late the next morning to a house that had already started its day. Tami and Julie were off to school and Eric and Gracie were silent.

J.D. stumbled out to look for them and found Gracie watching TV and Eric checking his e-mail on Tami's laptop. The older man smiled when he saw him. "Hey, morning, kiddo. Get any sleep last night?"

J.D. nodded and slumped at the table, gently resting his healing wrist on the surface.

"How're you feeling?" Eric asked.

"I'm okay," J.D. said hoarsely, and he realized that it was more than just an automated response. It was true. The anxiety he had felt not long ago was still living with him, but it was quieter, and he felt that if he kept ignoring it and focusing on the smiles of the people around him, it would wither away all together. He could be free.

"You know, I can't tell you how nice it is to have another male in the house," Eric said, his eyes scrunched up a bit from his smile. "Sometimes there's just too much estrogen around here, if you know what I mean."

J.D. smiled a little. "I guess I never thought of that."

"Well, you're used to being around females. You spent a lot of time with your mom, right?"

J.D. nodded and Eric noted how the teen's smile faded at the thought.

"You're lucky. Learn all you can about the womanly mind now and you'll be better prepared for life. I'm telling you. There ain't that much difference between men and women, but when it comes to communication..."

J.D. swallowed and bit his lower lip.

Eric sighed. "How was it talking to your mom?"

The boy shrugged, studying the grains of salt on the tabletop.

"Must've been pretty hard."

"I just miss her," J.D. quietly replied.

Eric nodded. "I'm sure she misses you, too."

"I mean, I really like it here, but I just wish she'd come home, you know?" he said, meeting Eric's dark gaze.

"Nothing will ever replace your relationship with her. And you'll have that again when she is ready to come home."

J.D. nodded, but the action was stiff and mechanical.

"We were thinking about going out to eat tonight. That sound good to you?"

J.D. swallowed again. He hated that his stomach had been made so queasy with nerves that he didn't know when he could trust himself to hold down food. He'd been eating so little lately that any amount of food bigger than a few bites was bound to make him queasy as it challenged the smallness that had become his stomach. "Sure," he said, hoping he wouldn't wind up puking at the restaurant.

"You got a favorite place?"

He shook his head no. "Just about anywhere is fine."

Eric smirked. "See, this is what I mean. Most guys don't mind so long as it's food. If I asked Tami and Julie that same question, they would've gotten into a debate on where the restaurant got its beef from."

J.D. smiled a little, realizing that he found the way the family teased about each other's quirks and biases to be more honest and refreshing than hurtful. He could only imagine what would've happened if he'd ever kept up a joke like that around his dad. The one time that he'd teased with his mom about proposing to two cheerleaders, which was obviously a joke, had received a laugh from his mom and a stern lecture about focusing on football from his dad.

The morning passed more quickly than J.D. anticipated, and he was happy to find sunlight peering through the overcast sky. Steam was rising from the surrounding rooftops as they warmed in the sun, shedding their rain. He attempted to tackle another chapter in his Math book, but the process was so boring that he quickly grew tired. When Eric left early to take Gracie to a play date before heading to work, J.D. curled up in a patch of sunlight in his room and was soon dozing.

Time slipped and slid with the noise of cars driving by outside, and at one point he thought Tami or Julie had come home for he heard the front door open. When there were no further sounds of life in the house, however, he decided it must've just been the house making a settling noise. He began to drift again, and was in a light sleep when he felt fingers brush against his forehead. He tried to ignore the sensation, for he was so warm and peaceful asleep, but then there was a weight on his arm, and a sigh that sounded like his father. He jerked into full wakefulness at the shutting of the front door.

Taking several short breaths, he sat up and looked around him, expecting to see someone, but he was alone. He sat stock still for several minutes, listening to the house around him as his blood surged past his ears, worried that someone had come in who wasn't supposed to be there. He touched his forehead, sure he had felt someone else do the same earlier, and had just begun to calm himself with the reasoning that it was probably just a fly, when the front door really did open.

His heart leapt in his chest at the sound and he was ready to flee into the closet until he heard Tami's familiar voice announce that she was home. He closed his eyes as relief flooded through him. He longed to cement his mind to the present and chase away the aggravating in-betweenness of dreams, so when she poked her head in to check on him, he got to his feet and hugged her tightly.

"Oh, sweetie," Tami said, wrapping her arms around him. "You all right?"

He didn't speak for a moment, for he could feel her warmth and the beating of her heart, anchoring him to his body, anchoring him to her presence. Tami reacted to the intensity of his embrace by rubbing his back and not asking further questions, happy to comfort him with her arms until he felt steady enough to speak. She could feel his heart racing against his ribs, which she could feel much more easily than in the past, and the thought filled her with concern. "I dreamed my dad came in here," he whispered at length.

"In our house?" she asked quietly, still holding him as tightly as he was holding her.

"He touched me."

Tami sighed. "I'm sorry, honey. That must've scared you."

J.D. took a few steadying breaths before letting go of his foster mother to look her in the eye. "I want him to just go away. I wish I could forget about him."

She brushed her thumb across his cheek. "I know, sweetheart, and I wish you could, too. C'mere." She pulled him into another hug and kissed the top of his head. "You wanna do something fun? You wanna do something to help you forget your dream?"

"Like what?"

"Halloween's getting close and we've got some decorations in the garage I've been meaning to put up. Wanna help me?"

He smiled a little as he pulled away again. "Sure."

Tami smiled and rubbed his arm before leading him to the garage. J.D. had just as much fun looking at the old decorations Julie had made as a child as he did putting them up. Tami caught him examining a jack-o'-lantern Julie had made when she was ten. She had cut out the face then pasted yellow tissue paper to the back of the construction paper so that when the decoration was taped to a window, the eyes appeared to glow. "You make one of those, too?" she asked.

He shook his head. "If I did, I don't remember."

"Your mom didn't keep your decorations?"

"I think maybe she did, somewhere once, but we moved, you know. So... stuff gets lost."

Tami tried not to give him a pitying look as she continued to unpack the box. She could just imagine Katie praising her child for his handiwork on a decoration then saying, "let's keep it somewhere safe" so that she wouldn't ruin the sterile symmetry of her walls by putting it up. Other than football, she doubted J.D. ever saw proof that his parents valued what he had to offer inside. "Hmm," was all she said in response, but as she got to the bottom of the box and found some orange and black construction paper, she got an idea.

The two spent the next two hours decorating the house and making new decorations of their own, and she was surprised by how focused the teen was on fashioning his own paper jack-o'-lanterns. After witnessing him helping with the fort the other day, and Gracie Bell's Cafe the day before that, Tami was beginning to notice a pattern. The boy had a lot of creativity in him that had either been squashed out by his father or had never found an outlet because the kid was always so exhausted after putting all of his energy into school and football.

"Oh, that looks great," she said, pretending to have just noticed the decoration he was finishing.

He smiled bashfully. "It's just a pumpkin."

"No, you're doing a great job. I wish I had creativity like that."

He finished pasting on the last detail then cocked his head at his creation, and Tami couldn't help but smile at his pensive expression, hoping that he believed her when she said that he was talented. She thought of what she knew of the boy, and how he said he used to love learning about space. There was a lot of unknown about space, and a lot of ideas that were found by thinking outside of the box. Space was a vast expanse where the imagination could run wild, so she found that it made sense for J.D. to be drawn towards activities and games where he could use his long-neglected imagination. At the very least, escaping into a game like he had with Gracie Bell, or a craft like he was right now, was a means of focusing his mental energy and keeping his thoughts away from his pain.

By the time Eric came home that evening with Gracie and Julie, who had stuck around school to study in the library, the house was festively decorated. Darkness was falling outside and with the scent of the leaves and the earth after a rainfall, it truly felt like autumn was in the air. "Look at this," Eric said as he hung up his coat and strolled further into the house. "Y'all have been busy. Look, Gracie." He tried to point out the decorations to the toddler but she was too busy squirming to try to get out of his arms, so Eric let her down on the floor.

Tami greeted her husband with a hug and a kiss, and while the teens were getting ready to go out to dinner, she showed him some of the decorations J.D. had made. "Isn't that great?" she said under her breath. "I think this is something good for him – something he's good at other than football."

Eric narrowed his eyes at the jack-o'-lantern J.D. had made. "Honey, that thing looks like it's about to come alive and eat us."

"Oh, it's just artistic expression."

Eric glanced around at the rest of the decorations his foster son had made, and as Tami did with a fresh eye, she realized that they did stand out from the rest. The boy certainly had a flare for the gothic, and for a moment she felt like she was on a Tim Burton set.

"Anyway," she said. "He had a nightmare or something this afternoon and was upset when I got home, so this helped distract him."

"What do you mean a nightmare?" Eric asked as he sat down to change out of his tennis shoes and into a nicer pair.

"I mean," Tami continued, tucking her hair behind her ear while keeping her voice down. "He was shaking when I held him. I think it was really real to him. He thought his dad had slipped into our house and touched him."

Eric furrowed his brow. "That's a little odd for a nightmare, don't you think?"

Tami shrugged. "Honey, they don't always make sense."

"No, I mean..." He glanced around to make sure they were alone. "I didn't lock the door when I left."

Tami furrowed her brow. "Yeah, so?"

"I thought Julie was on her way home then she texted me to say that she was staying late to study."

"Honey, I really don't see where you're going with –"

"I just think that's a pretty realistic dream."

Tami blinked for a few moments. "You mean... you think he was here?"

"You remember that time he visited you at the office? You said he was asking about who was watching J.D. and said something about how me being home half the day then you being home must be nice. He was trying to find out our schedule. He knew our work hours overlap – he knew when the kid would be here alone."

Tami's eyes grew a little rounder and her lips formed a thin line. J.D. walked into the room and grabbed his sweatshirt off the back of the couch. The two fell rather suspiciously silent as soon as he did so, and he glanced at them as he stuck his good arm through a sleeve. "What?"

"Nothing –" Tami began, but Eric cut her off.

"Tami was just telling me about the bad dream you had this afternoon, is all."

J.D. tucked in his lower lip a little in embarrassment. "Oh."

"Y'all almost ready?" Tami asked, forcing cheerfulness in her voice as she smiled at her foster son.

J.D. continued to try to struggle into his sweatshirt as Eric strode past him and Tami got up to help. Flipping on the switch to the outside light, Eric stepped outside. J.D. looked to Tami once his head was through the neck hole of his sweatshirt. "What's he doing?"

"Honey, I have no idea. But we should get going before it gets too busy."

"Hey, J.D.," Eric called from outside. "Can you come here for a sec?"

The teen cast a confused look to Tami then headed outside to follow Eric.

Eric pointed at a business card that had been stepped on and muddied, but appeared to have fallen out of a car.

J.D. looked from the card to Eric. "What is it?"

The coach picked up the card, pursing his lips as his shoulders grew tense. Tami appeared in the doorway, gazing out in confusion and Eric shared a dark look with her before returning his attention to J.D. "It's your dad's business card."

"What?" Tami asked, sounding exasperated.

J.D. looked between the two. "Why... why would that be here?"

"You ever have one of these with you?" Eric asked and the boy shook his head no. Eric sighed, lowering his voice. "That son of a bitch."

J.D. inched closer to Eric to look at the bedraggled card himself.

"Honey," Tami said, her voice strained. "Just because his card fell out of someone's car doesn't mean he was here."

J.D.'s eyes grew a little larger. "You think he was here?"

"No," Tami said.

"Son, I think your dream wasn't really a dream," Eric said, making the teen grow pale.

"Eric," Tami hissed.

"No, this is serious," Eric replied, ignoring her warning tone. "I think he's trying to intimidate us. I think he left this here on purpose so that we'd know what he'd done. And of course, there ain't any way to prove that it's true so we can't get him in trouble for violating his restraining order."

A hand suddenly latched onto the back of his shirt and Eric looked over his shoulder to find J.D. all but trying to disappear behind him.

"Eric," Tami said again, and this time the warning in her voice was vile, for the damage had already been done.

Eric looked from her to J.D. Knowing that what he'd said would scare the kid was different than seeing the deer-like fear on the boy's face as he surveyed the dark street, as if afraid his father would show up again at any moment. "Hey," Eric said softly. "C'mere. I gotcha." He hung an arm around the boy's shoulders, but J.D. only stiffened.

"What if he comes back?" J.D. asked, his voice shaking. "Why would he do that? He knows he's not supposed to see me. Why would he –"

"J.D., sweetie," Tami said from the doorway. "Even if he was here, that doesn't mean he came inside. He could've just stopped by to talk to one of us, saw we weren't here, then left."

Crystalline tears had pooled in the bottoms of the boy's blue eyes. "But I heard his breathing. I heard him breathing and he touched me and he was... he was in my room..."

As one of the tears broke loose, Eric ignored the boy's body language and pulled him into a hug anyway. "It's not your job to worry about that, all right?" he whispered, and he could feel the teen relaxing a little. "That's my job. All you have to worry about is taking care of yourself. You got that?"

J.D. nodded, but his body was trembling, and as Eric looked to Tami over his foster son's shoulder, the look of disapproval that she was giving him made him wish he hadn't ever voiced his concerns in the first place.

**Please share your thoughts! :)**


	21. Distrust

**Author's Note: Sorry it has taken me so long to update, and that I didn't have time today to individually respond to all of your lovely reviews. I hope you enjoy this new chapter and please know that I am still working on this story whenever I can. I hope you're all enjoying the holiday season!**

**BROKEN WINGS**

**CHAPTER 21: DISTRUST**

Eric tried to catch Tami's eye on the drive to the restaurant, but his wife intentionally ignored him. The two teens in the back seat were silent while Gracie Bell sang a little song to herself. Tami glanced at the kids in the rearview mirror. Julie was busy texting and J.D. looked as if he'd seen a ghost. Tami was surprised he had agreed to go out at all after how frightened he'd been by the idea of his father sneaking into the house that afternoon.

"So we're going to Denny's, right?" Julie asked without looking up from her phone.

Eric glanced at her in the mirror. "No, honey, we're going to Applebee's."

"Dad," Julie drawled, glancing up at him.

"Honey," Tami said. "What again is wrong with Applebee's?"

"Ugh, Mom," Julie said, finally pulling her phone away from her face. "If you worked there, you wouldn't want to spend any more time there than you had to, either. Trust me."

Tami sighed. "All right."

Eric tried to shoot Tami an amused look but his wife just stared ahead, ignoring him. After he'd seen the fear in his foster son's eyes, Eric had regretted saying anything in front of him. But then again, that was the power of hindsight. At the time, he'd been so caught up in his anger towards Joe McCoy that he just wasn't thinking about the possible repercussions for what he'd revealed.

Once at Denny's, the family slipped inside and sat down at a booth by the window. Tami was sure to wait at the back of the group so that she could sit on the end with Gracie. Not only did she want to be by the toddler who would be in a high chair, but she also wanted J.D. to feel as protected as possible. Glancing to him after they had all taken their seats, she smiled at how smashed in he was between Julie and Eric.

Julie began chatting about how unfair her History teacher was while the rest of them perused their menus. J.D. stared blankly at the laminated words and pictures before him, unable to find it in him to be hungry. He knew he had to eat and that Tami wouldn't let him get away with skipping another meal, but he also couldn't bring himself to care. No matter what he ate right now, it would taste like ash. He didn't realize he'd let the menu drift away from him and towards the tabletop until Eric reached over and straightened it.

"You know what you're having, son?" the coach asked.

J.D. shook his head.

"You should try the Caesar salad," Julie said. "It's really good."

"Or how about a cheeseburger?" Tami suggested. "They come with a side of fries."

"We already know you like pancakes," Eric said with a small smile. "And you know you can get plenty here. Won't have chocolate chips in them, though."

J.D. realized that he hadn't even looked a single one of them in the eye when they spoke to him, so he glanced up and set the menu down. "I don't really care what I eat," he said quietly.

"Yeah, you do," Julie said, her voice chipper, oblivious to what Eric discovered before they left the house. "You're just being polite. You want a hamburger."

Eric looked to Tami across the table but the blond continued to peruse her menu, even after he cleared his throat.

At length, the waiter took their orders, and after listening to Julie continue to chat about her History teacher, their meals arrived. J.D. was mildly surprised when a hamburger and fries was placed in front of him, for he had no memory of ordering. His mind was still caught up in the sound of his father's breathing and the gentle brush of his fingertips against his skin.

The rest of the family began to eat, and J.D. ate a few French fries, hoping that they would wake his stomach up. Eric noticed that the boy's eyes kept darting to the door, as if afraid that his father would stride through at any minute.

When the rest of them were halfway through their dinners, Tami finally looked Eric in the eye and gave J.D. a pointed glance. Eric followed her gaze and saw that the teen hadn't even touched his burger and was occupying himself with drawing spirals in his ketchup with a French fry. Eric sighed and shot Tami what he hoped was an apologetic look before returning his attention to J.D. "Hey," he said softly, clearing his throat. "You wanna take the rest of that home?"

J.D. didn't appear to have heard him so Eric lightly bumped the boy's shoulder, making him suck in a lungful of air as he broke out of his thoughts. "Huh?"

"You wanna take that home and have it later?"

J.D. looked to his burger and had the stray thought that they never tasted as good as they looked on _Spongebob_. "Yeah. Sure."

Eric nodded then looked back to his wife, who cast him an "I'm still angry with you" expression as she wiped at Gracie's mouth with a napkin.

The ride home was even quieter as the ride to the restaurant, and as soon as they had set foot in the house, J.D. headed for his room. Tami sighed and carried Gracie to the back to help her dress into her pajamas while Eric locked front door then checked the sliding glass door to the patio. He poked his head into J.D.'s room to find the teen on his bed, looking a little lost, as if he'd stepped into his room to get something then couldn't remember what it was. "Hey," Eric said.

J.D. looked up at him from under his sweatshirt hood but avoided his gaze.

"How you doing?"

J.D. shrugged then stared at the patch of carpet beside his bed, as if realizing that was the very spot his father had been.

"Why don't you go watch some TV?" Eric suggested.

The teen got up and strode past his former coach, heading to the living room. Eric sighed, wishing J.D. would at least look him in the eye, but the boy was a shifting shadow. Once Gracie was asleep, Eric watched Tami brush her teeth while the TV echoed from the other room, broadcasting the highlights of a college football game.

"I'm sorry," Eric said, and Tami finally met his gaze in the mirror. "I spoke hastily and I spooked the kid half to death. I shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry."

Tami spit out her excess toothpaste then straightened, looking at Eric in the mirror. "What are you gonna do about it?"

Eric shrugged, glancing around the small bathroom for a moment. "What do you mean 'what am I gonna do about it?' I ordered that security system last week, it's not my fault they haven't installed it yet."

Tami turned around to face her husband. "Eric, this isn't about First Alarm or any other stupid thing like that –"

"You said you wanted to feel safe when –"

"I'm talking about you not thinking of J.D. before you open your mouth," Tami hissed over her husband's response. "I'm talking about how you need to step up and be a foster father to this boy. For all we know, we're in this for the long haul. His mother's incapacitated and his father is..." Tami waved a hand in the air.

Eric shook his head. "Be a foster father to the kid? What... what do you think I've been doing all this time?"

Tami cocked her head in annoyance.

"I've been taking him to the doctor, I've been watching him every morning, I've been –"

"Thank you," Tami said, her voice firm. "Thank you for doing all of that. I appreciate it, I really do, and I know J.D. does, too. But that's not what I'm talking about. You need to change the way you think about him."

Eric shook his head. "What do you mean change the way I think about him? You think I don't like him?"

Tami sighed as she strode into the bedroom, Eric on her tail. "Honey, all I'm saying is that you should've thought about the consequences of what you said tonight before you even said it."

Eric furrowed his brow. "I know that now, and I regret that, but you gotta understand that –"

"He's not normal," Tami said, keeping her voice forceful but quiet. "That boy is not normal. He's not the kid you coached last year or hell, even a month ago. That boy was cocky, rushing to grow up and borderline annoying. I wouldn't have wanted that boy in my house. But he's never going to be that boy again. He's fragile, and he's afraid, and he can't trust much of anything but he's trying to anyway. Honey, he's trying so hard. You can't break that trust with him. He's got to feel safe here."

Eric studied his wife for the span of several breaths, his lips pressed together. "You see, this is where you and I differ," he countered, his voice a forceful whisper. "You're coddling that kid and trying your damndest to shelter him and you know what happens when you do that? Every time you look at him with compassion, every time you praise him for some little thing, he's reminded that he ain't normal. That he ain't who he used to be."

"You think he isn't already reminded of that every time he needs help with something because he can't use his right hand?"

"Look," Eric said, taking a deep breath and letting it out through his nose. "What you were doing worked great when he first came back from the hospital, but it's not what he needs right now. He needs to be treated like a normal kid."

Tami frowned as she sat down on the bed. "I _am_ treating him like a –"

"We need to just start telling him the truth because that's the only way he'll know that we trust that he's strong enough to handle it. That he's strong enough to get through this. No more hand-holding."

Tami's mouth was a thin line. "He is an abused child, Eric. No matter how hard you pretend that he's normal, he's not going to be. He's just not."

Eric sighed and sat down beside her, running a hand through his unruly black hair. "Normal is overrated, anyhow."

Tami smiled a little and rested a hand on his shoulder.

"I just think we ought to start treating him more like an adult."

"He's not an adult, baby, he's a sixteen-year-old boy. A young sixteen, at that."

"Yeah, he looks even younger now that he's scared all the time." He reached up and rested his hand on hers.

"We're just gonna have to take this one step at a time, okay? But we need to be on the same page or else this isn't gonna work."

Eric nodded, studying the carpet. After several long moments, he got to his feet. "I'm gonna go talk to him."

Tami smiled weakly and Eric slipped off and headed down the hall, past Julie's room where he could hear her chatting on the phone with Matt. He found J.D. watching a sports talk show and watched the screen for a few seconds before speaking. "I've been thinking about how I handled the situation earlier this evening and I just wanted to let you know that I'm sorry if I scared you. I want you to feel safe here, and I want you to be able to trust me, so I should've handled that whole situation..." Eric finally looked down at the teen on the couch to gauge his reaction, only to discover that the boy was sound asleep. "...Differently." Eric sighed and smiled a little.

J.D. had slumped into an awkward position and while Eric was tempted to leave him be in peace, he knew the teen would wake up with a sore neck.

Switching off the TV, Eric tapped J.D.'s shoulder. "Hey," he said softly. "You wanna sleep on the couch or what?"

J.D. cracked his eyes open, his brows knitting in confusion. "What?"

"You wanna sleep on the couch or you wanna go to bed?"

The teen shifted so that his head was on a pillow as he rolled over, his back to Eric. The coach furrowed his brow, worrying that J.D. was passive aggressively ignoring him, then realized that the kid was still asleep. Shaking his head, Eric grabbed another pillow and gently propped the boy's broken arm up on it before covering him with a blanket and heading to bed himself.

* * *

J.D. awoke several times, but was only awake enough to realize he was slightly uncomfortable, and though he couldn't quite shift into a sprawled position that suited him, he would fall back asleep before he could care. He dreamed of being in class then the dream changed and he was drifting in a sailboat. Alone at sea, the sun was warm and soothing and the waves were comforting in their rocking motion. Then a large one approached, and just as he realized he needed to angle the boat differently, the wave struck and he was hit. Falling over the gunwale, J.D. woke up as he landed on the living room floor.

Gasping for breath and wincing as his healing arm and back throbbed, he grit his teeth, trying to convince himself that he'd never been at sea to begin with. Opening his eyes as the pain ebbed, a dim light was coming in from behind the curtains of the sliding glass door from the patio. His vision adjusted and he remembered where he was. The floor was cold and the house was eerily quiet. A car drove by outside and J.D. remembered the business card Eric found earlier that night. The memory made him fully awake.

Climbing to his feet, J.D. took several deep breaths in an attempt to calm his suddenly racing heart. _He's not here_, he reminded himself. _He's not here. He's not here. He's not here._ Just as his pulse began to slow, he heard a door open. His spine went rigid as he glanced about frantically for a weapon. His father was back. There was nothing he could use, so he would have to bolt through the back door. He would have to –

Julie stumbled down the hall, her eyes only half open as she wandered into the kitchen. J.D. felt his shoulders sag with relief when he realized it was her door that had opened, and not the front. She poured herself a glass of milk then glanced over his way. With a gasp, she dropped the carton and held a hand over her mouth. "Oh my God," she hissed, her eyes wide. J.D. was just as filled with adrenaline from her start and glanced to the milk, glad that it had landed right side up on the counter. "You scared the crap out of me," Julie half-whined.

"Sorry," J.D. whispered. "You did, too."

"What're you doing out here?"

"I fell asleep on the couch."

Julie realized where he was standing, looking fully awake after her fright. "Oh. Right."

She grabbed a paper towel to wipe up the puddle of milk that had splashed out when she let the carton slam on the counter. J.D. crossed over to her and grabbed another towel to help. "Sorry."

She shook her head. "It's okay. I was just... I mean, I couldn't sleep because I was hungry. I should've eaten more than a salad."

J.D. gathered up the soiled paper towels and threw them away and Julie took a sip of her milk.

"You seemed a little, I don't know, tense or something tonight," Julie said as J.D. stepped back over to her.

"Well, your dad found my dad's business card in the driveway before we left."

Julie furrowed her brow. "What?"

J.D. sat down on a stool at the island. "Just before we went out to eat."

She shook her head. "Wait, I don't understand. Why would anyone leave your dad's business card on the driveway?"

J.D. glanced down the hall towards Eric and Tami's room then back to his foster sister, his voice soft. "I think they didn't tell you because they didn't want to scare you, but I'm pretty sure my dad was in the house yesterday."

Julie shoved her milk aside. "Wait, stop this isn't funny." She waited for J.D. to backpedal or contradict himself in some way, but his blue gaze was unflinching. "What the hell?" She straightened. "I mean, seriously, what the hell? That creep was in our house?"

J.D. shot a nervous glance down the hallway again as her voice rose.

"Why the hell would he do that?"

"I don't know," J.D. said quietly. "I guess he wanted to see me or something."

"Well, too bad for him, he lost that right when he beat you with a golf club." J.D.'s gazed had drifted away but sharply returned to hers at that and Julie cringed. "Sorry," she muttered.

He shrugged a little, shifting his attention to the counter. "It's fine. I don't really care who knows what happened anymore. The whole school probably knows."

"Landy Clark is kind of... the biggest gossip ever," Julie said with a sigh. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to –"

"I think he's trying to scare your mom."

Julie furrowed her brow. "Landry?"

J.D. quirked a brow. "My dad."

"Oh..."

"Well, I mean, it's no secret that my family didn't exactly get along with yours after the whole CPS thing."

"Which was obviously the right thing to do," Julie said.

"Well, whatever, I've obviously changed my mind about that but my dad was really pissed for a long time. He like, hated your parents."

"Yeah," Julie said, taking a seat next to him. "That was kind of obvious. I mean, it's not just my parents. He's been messing with me, too. When Tim punched him the other day, he'd been trying to be all friendly and stuff. It was weird." J.D. stared at her, his lips parted and his brows ever so slightly together and Julie held a hand to her forehead. "Crap. You weren't supposed to know about that."

J.D. furrowed his brow and leaned in a little closer. "Tim Riggins punched my dad?"

Julie pressed her lips together as she nodded.

To her surprise, J.D. smiled. "You saw?"

Julie laughed. "Wow, that was not the reaction I was expecting."

"No, tell me what happened."

Julie told him the story of how Joe had sauntered up to her after the game and tried to make small talk, only to trade insults with Riggins and receive a punch in the face for his trouble.

"No way," J.D. said, fighting back a laugh.

"Way," Julie said with an arched brow as she took a sip of her milk. "It was a pretty good punch, too."

J.D.'s amused expression faded after a few moments. "And your parents told you not to tell me?"

Julie sighed, setting aside her cup. "They just want you to feel safe."

"Yeah, but they also didn't tell you that he was here this afternoon." He glanced at the clock and realized it was now 3:30 in the morning. "Well, yesterday afternoon. It's kind of important for you to know that."

"Um, yeah. The guy is kind of a raging psycho."

J.D. took in a deep breath and let it out shakily, and Julie worried she'd upset him by calling his father such a name, but held her tongue in correcting herself, for a truer description she had never felt.

"God." He rubbed his face with his good arm. "Your parents must think I'm an idiot."

"Why would you say that?"

"Because they're hiding stuff from me. They think I can't handle knowing what's really going on."

"They're doing the same to me. They just don't want you to worry about your dad."

J.D. met her gaze, his voice flat. "I had to have half my blood replaced and will probably never play football again because of my dad. I'm gonna worry about him no matter what."

Julie bit her lip and nodded. "Good point. You should tell my mom that."

"No way."

"Why not? You can tell my mom anything. She's a counselor, remember?"

He shrugged one shoulder, drawing designs on the counter top with the end of a spoon. "I know. But... I don't know."

Julie bumped her knee against his. "What?"

"She already has enough to handle. I've been pretty... retarded."

Even in the dim light, Julie could see the way his cheeks were coloring with embarrassment. "Hey," she said softly, and when he didn't respond, she gently touched his chin to get his attention. "You're not retarded. Not even close. In fact, I'm really, really proud of you. We all are. If something like that happened to me..." She shook her head. "I'd be a mess. A total mess. And on top of it all, your mom is across the country and you're living with people who aren't even your family. I think you're doing pretty damn well."

He bit the inside of his lower lip. "You guys are starting to feel more like family than mine ever did."

Julie smiled. "Good. Then I can make fun of you. I can't make fun of Gracie because that would be just cruel to pick on a baby."

J.D. smiled a little with one side of his mouth.

Julie glanced at the clock. "It's really late. We should try to get some sleep."

He nodded and watched her slide off her seat and put her cup in the sink before following her down the hallway. "Hey," he whispered as they each rested a hand on their doorknobs. "Do we tell your parents that we know what we're not supposed to?"

"Um," Julie glanced down to her parents room then back over to him. "Well, first off, they're your parents now, too. And I don't know. Let's talk about it tomorrow."

J.D. nodded, smiling a little. "All right."

"Goodnight."

"Sweet dreams." They each slipped into their rooms. J.D. lay down in his bed, his back to the portion of carpet his father had stood on earlier. He took in a deep breath and let it out, happy to note that he only felt stiffness in his ribs as he did so, as opposed to pain. The knowledge that Tami and Eric were keeping information about his own father from him buzzed around in his mind, keeping him awake despite his sleepiness.

While earlier he was more preoccupied with the fear of his father paying him another visit, he was now caught up on the fact that his foster parents had lied to him. If they had lied to him once, they would again. Though Eric had frightened him earlier in the night, at least he had been brutally honest in sharing their reality, unlike Tami. J.D. bit his thumbnail as he realized that the sick sensation slicking his stomach was a growing distrust for his foster mother.

**Please share your thoughts! :)**


	22. The Calm Before the Storm

**Author's Note: I hope you all had a lovely holiday! I had hoped to post before the holidays, but it was a fool's wish. I'm sorry that it has taken me so long between updates, but know that I have used my time well. I just re-watched season 3 so I now have a better grasp on the _FNL _world. And while I've said it before, let me reiterate that the Madison in this story is not the girl in the show. The Madison in the show terrifies me. It has something to do with her looking 30 (and thus akin to a pedophile) and being so pushy and forward. I'm convinced she's secretly a murderer.**

**THANK YOU SO MUCH TO ALL REVIEWERS! YOU GUYS KEEP ME GOING. :)  
**

**BROKEN WINGS**

**CHAPTER 22: THE CALM BEFORE THE STORM**

Tami looked out the window at her foster son who was lying on the lawn in the backyard, looking up at the stars. His breath clouded before him and she knew he couldn't possibly be warm enough in just his sweatshirt and jeans, but she didn't dare bother him to bring him a blanket. Even at a distance, she could see that though his nose was pink with cold, his face was relaxed and he was at peace. Peace so rare that she didn't dare do anything to disrupt it.

A week had passed since Eric had suggested that Joe McCoy had snuck into their house while J.D. was home alone, and ever since, the boy had changed. He had become even quieter than he'd been in the past and didn't speak unless spoken to. There were times when Tami caught him lost in his head, his blue eyes dark and unfocused as he tread down a shadowed path in his mind. He was never rude and did everything she or Eric asked of him, as if he welcomed being told what to do. He'd been told what to do his whole life, so Tami knew that the comfort of being obedient and not having to think was an easy habit for the boy to slip back into. But the fact that he was slipping back into it at all disquieted her.

She had felt like she had made some progress with J.D. He had shown her fear and anguish and affection with little hesitation, but now he was stoic and reserved. Tami sighed as she studied his profile in the distance. She couldn't help but feel that the more his body healed, the more he was pulling away from her.

"You coming to bed?" Eric asked as he stepped into the living room and spotted his wife by the sliding glass door.

"Yeah… in a minute."

Eric furrowed his brow and stepped up beside her to see what she was looking at. "He's still out there?"

"It's a clear night. He loves looking at the stars."

"Yeah, and it's also in the 40's. He'll catch his death out there." Before Tami could stop him, Eric opened the sliding glass door and hollered out to the teen. "J.D.! Why don't you come on in inside now, huh?"

J.D. stiffly got to his feet with a quiet "Yes, sir," and Tami shot Eric a brief look.

"What?" he asked.

"Nothing."

"Tami, it's 10:30."

His wife ignored him as J.D. neared and she shot the teen a warm smile. "Y'all must be freezing." J.D. shrugged, stepping into the house with only the briefest of glances at his foster parents. "You think you want an extra blanket for tonight?"

The boy headed for his room without turning around, muttering "No thanks."

"All right." Tami sighed again and waited until she heard the door to J.D.'s room shut before she spoke again. "He's been quiet, don't you think?"

Eric locked the sliding glass door then headed to the front of the house to turn on the alarm that had been installed a few days ago. "Yeah. He's been quiet. But his therapist says everything's fine. Maybe he's just talking to him more than us."

Tami furrowed her brow. "Well, hun, that doesn't make sense. He knows he can tell me anything."

Eric shrugged. "If he wants to talk, he'll talk. You can't force him to be an open book."

"I know that." Tami tucked her bangs behind her ear. "I just think it's a big change. And to be honest, I'm a little worried by it."

"Honey, men don't like to walk around talking about their feelings all the time."

"Oh, don't be ridiculous," Tami hissed quietly as they headed down the hall. "You talk about your feelings all the time."

"I do not."

"Yes, you do, only you're too ignorant to know you're even doing it."

Eric paused inside their bedroom. "What're you talking about?"

"I'm talking about this." Tami imitated Eric by leaning her head in slightly and breathing hard through her nose. "And this." She straightened and slightly parted her lips before narrowing her eyes.

"I look nothing like that."

Tami chuckled as she headed over to the bed. "Honey, you look _exactly_ like that. I guarantee that if you ask any of the boys on your team, they'll tell you that that's your angry and your 'Oh no, you didn't,' face."

Eric smirked. "My 'Oh no, you didn't' face, huh?"

"Mmm hmm." She climbed in under the covers. "You're easier to read than an open book, hun. You don't need to talk about what's going on, you show it."

Eric shook his head with a smile as he walked over to his side of the bed.

"J.D., though… he used to show what he was thinking… now he just… wears that damn mask all the time."

Eric climbed into bed beside her. "You ever think that maybe it isn't a mask?"

Tami craned her neck to look at him.

"What're you gonna do when he's strong enough to go back to school and face the world on his own?"

"That's a silly question."

"I'm serious. What'll you do?"  
"I'll be proud of him, of course. It takes more guts than most people have." Tami sighed and snuggled against her pillow.

"What if that day is tomorrow?"

Tami stared at the wall across from her and let out a deep breath. She knew what Eric was getting at. She couldn't ever force J.D. to become more expressive or to become someone he wasn't. Slipping back into his old mask meant a return to his version of normalcy, and if his therapist thought he was fine… then it was simple. J.D. just didn't need her anymore.

Down the hall, J.D. had changed into his pajamas and was curled up under his blankets, his back to where his father had been. He thought of the stars and of the constellations he had seen. He thought of how beautiful they were in the cold. And he thought of how no matter how long he stargazed, no matter how cold he got, he could never return to that drifting state he had felt when he lay bleeding. A touch of frost glazed his heart as he realized that no matter how hard he tried, he'd never feel the oneness with the stars he had when he was dying.

The next morning, Tami sipped her coffee as she watched Julie gather up her homework from the night before. J.D. was sitting on the couch with Gracie, watching a children's show with her. Taking a deep breath, Tami set down her mug. "J.D., hun, can I talk to you real quick?"

"Sure." He glanced at her then headed over to the counter.

Tami offered him a warm smile. "Your therapist says you're doing really well. How do you feel, though? You feel all right?"

J.D. nodded. He no longer moved with the stiffness he had before, and though his arm was still full of pins and had to be elevated, he no longer guarded it as he once had. The bruise around his eye had receded into a dark sailor's moon decorated with a healing scar from the stitches. She knew that if anyone had just seen him for the first time, they would think he looked pretty bad. But after seeing what he looked like in the hospital, she couldn't help but be relieved by how well he was healing.

"You look like you feel a lot better."

"I don't need the pain pills anymore."

Her smile blossomed again. "That's great." Tami hesitated for a moment as she picked up her mug again. "Hun, what do you think about going back to school pretty soon here?"

Behind J.D., Julie had been stuffing her homework into her book bag and paused, looking over at the two. Tami watched a crack form in the boy's mask as his eyes narrowed a little. "Go back to school?"

"Mmm hmm." Tami took a sip of her coffee, her eyebrows raised.

J.D.'s eyes drifted away from hers and she watched his reaction intently, noting that his shoulders were growing stiff.

"What do you think?"

He shrugged, looking at the floor.

Tami pretended she didn't see the anxiety in his actions. "How about on Wednesday? You're all caught up with your schoolwork, I know that."

"Can't I just keep doing it here?"

"No, hun, you'll go insane. You need to be around other people. People your own age."

Julie bit her lip before approaching from behind. "People would be really happy to see you again."

J.D. cast his foster sister a doleful look as she stepped past with a smile.

"Julie's right," Tami added. "Don't you miss your friends?"

"Not really," the boy mumbled.

Gracie laughed from the couch at something on TV. "Jay Gee!" she called. "He went over to da guy's house, and… and… and… da guy, he had his whole house filled up with bubbles dat floated out of da windows."

Both J.D. and Tami smiled at Gracie as the little girl returned her attention to the cartoon. When J.D. looked back at Tami, she arched a brow. "I know it's tempting, but you can't stay here and watch cartoons all day." She took a sip of her coffee and grabbed her purse as Julie went out the door. "I know you don't like it but you and I have a responsibility to give you a good education. And as your foster mother it's my job to sometimes make you do things you don't want to. But I think you're ready, hun. I really do."

"Okay," he replied, so quietly that Tami nearly missed it. She smiled and grabbed his face to give him a smooch on the cheek before bustling out of the house after Julie. J.D. sighed, feeling knots form in his stomach, his mind immediately hunting out excuses he could use to stall returning to school. The mere thought of all the people, all the staring, and all the whispered questions made his heart race. He didn't want to go back. Ever. Least of all in a day.

Tami watched J.D. closely that afternoon and evening, looking for signs that the boy wouldn't be able to handle her suggestion, but he seemed to be weathering it well enough. Had he shown any outward signs of not being ready to go back to school, or even said as much, she would have changed her decision. But he was quiet and collected, and she began to believe in Eric's words. The boy was getting better and didn't need her like he used to. She knew she should be happy for him, but a part of her, against all reason, was sad.

For his part, J.D. put forth a valiant effort to keep his true feelings on the matter hidden. He didn't realize that Tami had asked him so offhandedly in an attempt to get a candid response. All he knew was that his foster mother had made a major decision for him, out of the blue, and hadn't asked him how he felt ahead of time because she undoubtedly thought he wasn't capable of making the decision. Just as he wasn't capable of handling that Riggins had punched his dad.

When Wednesday arrived, Tami drove J.D. to school. After some small talk about his physical therapy that had ended, the boy was silent. Tami couldn't look away from the road long enough to truly study his expression, but he appeared placid, even if he was hiding under his sweatshirt with the hood on. "J.D., I just want you to know that if you have any trouble today – any trouble at all – you can come straight to my office, okay?"

"Yeah," he said, his gaze out the window.

Tami glanced at him. "I mean it. Any trouble."

"I know."

She sighed as she pulled into her parking space. "Well, here we are." She pivoted to look at him. "It's probably pretty embarrassing to be seen coming to school in the principal's car, isn't it?"

J.D. stared ahead and shrugged.

Tami glanced at her watch. "You better get inside. You've only got ten minutes and I'm sure you'll want to talk to some people."

"Yeah," he breathed before shooting her a brief glance. "Thanks."

Tami smiled. "You're welcome."

J.D. got out of the car and gently pulled the strap of his book bag onto his left shoulder. Tami watched him as he headed into the building, noting that he was keeping his injured arm close to his abdomen and seemed to have tried to disguise the cast with his sleeve. Letting out a long breath, she tried not to be nervous for him and got out of the car.

J.D. strode purposefully into the building, but once the door was shut behind him and he was out of sight of Tami, his purposefulness faded. His senses were invaded by the din of two thousand students talking, the scuffing of their feet, the scent of their shampoos. The air was unnaturally warm and as he stepped past a trash can, the smell of mildewing milk reminded him that he was back in school. The thought of being confined for six more hours made him swallow past a lump in his throat.

He wanted to go home. He wanted to be watching the morning grow brighter outside while sitting on the warm couch beside Gracie Bell, watching _Sesame_ _Street_. He wanted to smell the Taylor's coffee and feel secure in the quiet of the house once the two women had left for the school. It should just be him and Gracie right now, watching Big Bird sing about the alphabet while Eric showered. He should be –

"Hey, look who's back," Landry drawled as he strolled over, a wide smile on his face. J.D. was forced out of the comfort of his mind and into the present, realizing that he'd been standing by the garbage can at the entrance for a while now. "How's it going, buddy?" Landry asked as he rested a hand on the younger boy's shoulder.

"Good," J.D. replied, forcing out a small smile. "I'm good."

Landry nodded, and though he tried to keep the friendly look on his face, J.D. noticed his eyes dart to the bruising on his face, even if only for a second. "Good. You look good."

J.D. didn't know what to do, so he pretended to adjust the strap on his book bag.

"Must be kinda weird, huh?" Landry asked.

"What?"

"Coming back to school after you were gone, what, like a month or something? Was it longer than a month?"

"I don't really know."

Landry furrowed his brow, noting the fact that J.D. had hardly looked at him the whole time, much less made eye contact. "Wanna meet up at lunch or something?"

J.D. shot him a brief glance. "Yeah. Sure."

Landry hesitated. "Okay." When J.D. didn't offer anything further, he took a step back. "Seeya, then."

"Bye."

Landry swiveled about on his heels and sauntered over to his locker, hoping that the shell behind him wasn't going to stick around for much longer. There had been times that he'd found J.D. annoying, and plenty more times when he'd been irritated with all the attention he'd received as QB1, but now he wanted nothing more than to see the annoyingly naïve, enthusiastic kid he'd first met on the field.

J.D. watched Landry go, realizing that he wouldn't blame him if the older teen thought he was a freak. He felt like a freak. He had wires sticking out of his arm and scars from stitches in his face. Subconsciously, his good hand rested on the large scar on his stomach. The bell rang and the students in the halls began to dissipate. J.D. swallowed hard then headed for his first class. He didn't know if anyone stared at him or not, because he didn't look around him enough to find out. He bowed his head and walked straight to room thirty-seven.

After stepping inside the English classroom, he realized with a jolt of horror that he couldn't remember where his seat had been. Rows of empty desks sat before him, and if he sat in the wrong one, he would draw attention to himself as he moved. Students began filing in behind him, slithering to their seats, and J.D. tried to remember who it was he had last sat behind. When the desks were half full, he turned to the teacher, Mr. Collins, and told him that he couldn't remember where he sat. "I've lost my seating chart," Mr. Collins said with his head bent over a book. He smiled when he glanced up and recognized J.D. "No problem. Just hang out here for a minute."

That was the last thing J.D. wanted to do, but he obeyed the teacher. Mr. Collins waited until the second bell rang and all of his students had taken their seats before directing J.D. to an open one in the middle. J.D. tried his best not to look like a dog with his tail between his legs as he made his way to his seat, and could feel nearly everyone watching him.

"Welcome back, bro," the boy across from him said as J.D. sat down.

"Yeah," several other students added. "Welcome back."

J.D. forced himself to glance around at the owners of the voices, muttering a quiet "thank you," both tickled and intimidated by his classmates' attention. Mr. Collins cleared his throat and began a lecture about _Lord of the Flies_, and J.D. felt his cheeks burn as he overheard a female voice whispering to her friend, and caught the words "…lives with Principal Taylor.." Everyone in the school undoubtedly knew that he was living with the Taylors, just as everyone probably knew that his own father had injured him so badly.

A lot of people he'd never met knew who he was because of his success on the football field, and he could just imagine them wanting to know more about what happened to shatter his perfect career, lusting for details as if he were a character in a soap opera. He wished he'd never even touched a football. He wished he didn't know who his dad was.

While Mr. Collins continued to draw a Venn diagram for Jack and Ralph, J.D. noticed that everyone in class was either stealing glances at him, or pretending he wasn't there at all. Tugging his binder out of his book bag, he realized that taking out a clean sheet of paper would be too hard with only his left hand, so instead he opened to a blank page and grabbed his pencil. Studying the Venn diagram on the board, he tried to copy it, only to wind up with two scribbly ovals that were too narrow to fit much in.

He'd had practice writing with his left hand while doing his homework, but he now felt the pressure to write everything down quickly to keep up, and the worry that he wasn't writing fast enough combined with the way everyone kept looking at him was making taking notes much harder than it should have been. What if someone looked over and saw how pitiful his handwriting was?

The hour-long class seemed to stretch out for an eternity, and J.D. didn't think he'd ever seen the long hand on a clock move so slow. In fact, he was sure it went backwards a few times. At long last, the bell rang and after copying down his homework, he clumsily stuffed his binder back into his bag and shouldered it before heading to Biology.

Biology was no different than English, and most everyone tried to sneak a look at the bruise on his face. Everyone except the kid in the back who had already seen it since they shared their English class together. Their teacher showed a video for the majority of the period, which was a pleasant distraction for J.D., and soon the bell rang again, signaling brunch. As J.D. hurried from the classroom, he accidentally bumped into an older student he didn't know. By the looks of him, the dark, tall boy played basketball. "Whoa, whoa, whoa," he said.

J.D. muttered an apology and tried to keep going but the older boy grabbed onto the sleeve of his hoodie. He tugged J.D. back over, getting a good look at his face as he did so.

"What's the rush, Frankenstein? Don't you know Halloween's not till Friday?"

J.D. jerked his arm free and hurried away, the laugh of the basketball player and his friends echoing behind him. He thought of trying to find Landry or waiting out the break in Tami's office, but knew that if he did either of those options, he'd have to face the same torture again right after. Changing direction, J.D. headed for the door and strode out of the school.

**PLEASE SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS. :)**


End file.
